Batman Page #34

INT. CATHEDRAL - A MOMENT LATER - NIGHT

Ancient and creepy. A huge pipe organ, shattered stained

glass windows, row after row of mahogany pews... all

forgotten, covered with dust and cobwebs. The JOKER wanders

about, staring at the statuary, the rusted icons.

DICK enters silently behind him. He kneels behind a rear

pew, brings up the gun, and squeezes off THREE QUICK SHOTS

at the JOKER. The JOKER dives, takes cover, and RETURNS

DICK'S FIRE. Then: silence.

In a crouch, groping his way along the wall, THE JOKER

finds what he wants: a small door opening on a wooden

stairway, leading to the belltower. He ducks inside and

starts up.

DICK'S GUN drops with a thud. His hand slips from the back

of the pew. In the second before he slumps to the floor,

unconscious, he sees a curious sight: a TINY BLACK NINJA

WHEEL, imbedded in the flesh of his leg.

Behind him -- framed in the arched doorway -- A RAGGED

BLACK GHOST begins his final unholy march down the center

aisle of the old cathedral.

INT. CATHEDRAL - BELLTOWER - NIGHT

A tiny stone chamber, 8'x8', open on four sides to the

wind. The enormous church bell has long since been removed.

The JOKER stands in an archway, gazing at the gargoyles on

the roof below. He hits a button on the walkie-talkie:

JOKER:

I'm in the belltower. Don't land.

INT. HELICOPTER - MOVING - NIGHT

A PILOT replies through his radio headset.

PILOT:

E.T.A. two minutes. Hang on.

The PILOT swings the copter right in a wide, swooping arc.

INT. STAIRWAY TO BELLTOWER - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

BATMAN. Broken, beaten, his right leg useless, he hauls

himself up the steps one at a time. He should be dead.

Dried blood cakes his face, his chest.

Dizzy, exhausted, his body strained to the limit, he slumps

against a wall to steady himself, then reaches into his

utility belt for a painkiller -- and forces the capsule

back onto his dry, swollen tongue.

Quaking all over, he tries to draw himself erect... and

TOPPLES OVER, landing with his full weight on the rotten

wood of the belltower stairs.

THE STAIRWAY COLLAPSES, turning to splinters beneath him.

And suddenly BATMAN finds himself DANGLING PRECARIOUSLY IN

MIDAIR, hanging by one hand to an upper step.

It would be so much easier to let go. He looks down at the

fragments of the shattered stairway, STILL FALLING,

vanishing into the dark depths of the stairwell.

Then he looks up. At the trapdoor. A mere six feet away.

His TEETH CLENCH in a monstrous grimace. AND WITH AN

INHUMAN EFFORT, HE HOISTS HIMSELF UP ONTO THE UPPER STEPS.

For a full five seconds he's blind with pain. A RAGGED

WOODEN SHAFT is buried in his right shoulder. Twitching,

trembling, he reaches up and YANKS IT OUT with his last

ounce of strength.

The trapdoor is a foot above his head. It could be a mile.

BATMAN finally realizes he's not going to make it.

He reaches down and rips open a Velcro seal on his utility

belt, revealing the strange TIMER DEVICE we saw him making

earlier. Before he can activate it his hand falls limply at

his side.

THE BATMAN is out like a light.

INT. BELLTOWER - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

The JOKER glances casually down at the trapdoor, wondering

what all the noise is about. He draws his gun, moves

cautiously to the trapdoor, and lifts it a few inches...

just enough to see the unconscious form on the stairs.

JOKER:

... Batman?

No reply. The JOKER stands there and lets out a little

snicker. He looks out through the archway, sees no sign of

his rescue copter. Then -- a look of curious amusement on

his face -- he steps down THROUGH THE TRAPDOOR and LUGS

BATMAN up into the belltower.

He props BATMAN up against a wall. Still no sign of life.

The JOKER crouches beside him and -- almost tenderly --

pats his face.

JOKER (cont.)

Batman? Batman?

THE BATMAN's lips part. But he's too weak to speak.

JOKER (cont.)

I thought you'd be more comfortable

here in the belfry.

(chuckling to himself)

Before I kill you I'd like to see

who you are. Would that be okay?

BATMAN emits a tiny low moan. The JOKER takes it as a yes

and reaches over to undo his cowl.

BRUCE WAYNE stares up with dulled, sightless eyes. The

JOKER reaches into his pocket for a purple handkerchief,

moistens it, dabs at the caked blood on BRUCE's face.

JOKER (cont.)

Oh my, aren't we pretty.

(brightening suddenly)

I know you! You're the rich boy!!

The JOKER is enormously tickled by this discovery. He claps

his hands together in sheer glee.

JOKER (cont.)

My goodness, what in the world made

you do it? It must've been

something pretty terrible!

He's practically dancing now. He's made a friend.

JOKER (cont.)

You know, we should've sat down and

had us a little heart-to-heart. I

bet we would have got on famously.

BATMAN:

Mad... man...

JOKER:

Well now, you're not exactly the

picture of mental health, are you.

BATMAN:

... Murderer...

JOKER:

Bruce, we're both murderers. Think

how many people you've killed by

letting me live.

A SPOTLIGHT cuts through the night sky. The JOKER hears his

helicopter approaching in the distance.

BRUCE reaches down furtively. Finds the timer on his

utility belt. FLICKS A SWITCH... and the countdown begins.

The JOKER pulls a straight razor from his pocket and opens

it gingerly.

JOKER (cont.)

I have to do it now, Bruce, but it

won't even hurt. Now relax. The

bat's in his belfry, all's right

with the world...

He has the razor almost up to BRUCE's throat when BRUCE

reaches out and GRABS HIS LAPELS in a death grip. The JOKER

is momentarily amused by this seeming display of affection.

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