Be Kind Rewind Page #6

- We're gonna go down here.

- It's Rush Hour 2...

...and you're gonna play the girl.

Action, guys.

What...?

- Oh, damn. Damn.

- What was that?

Hold still.

- Stop.

- Sorry. I'm sorry.

He got exposed to radioactive waves.

Are you radioactive?

Is it contagious?

Am I gonna be radioactive now?

Not radioactive! Magnetized!

Give me my bottle.

I'm sorry, we didn't have a chance to...

It's not contagious.

I'm just gonna check...

Sorry. You're fine.

- This came out pretty good.

- I'm fine?

- Not magnetized.

- Uh-huh, yeah. Okay, good.

- Not magnetized.

- What about your friend?

Huh?

Hey, Jerry. I'm really sorry

about hurting your feelings.

I just, like... I got really scared

about the radioactive stuff.

Yeah, I know.

It's my fault, I should've warned you.

Yeah.

Is that you?

- I took the whole bottle.

- Why would you do that, Jerry?

I just wanted to go to sleep.

Am I gonna die?

Yeah, it's aspirin, not sleeping pills,

you dummy. Why be a dummy?

You are not going to die, okay?

- If you do what I say, okay?

- What's happening?

I need you to go to the bathroom...

...get me a bucket full of salt and water,

right now.

- Salt, salt.

- Okay?

Just sit down, relax.

- I'm gonna die.

- No, you're not gonna die, I promise.

- I've done it before.

- I have a good future.

Here, here. Drink it, drink it.

Good.

- You okay?

- That was good.

Hey, look at me, I'm doing good.

Oh, that's me.

Oh, not again.

Why does he have to puke

outside of the shop every time?

Oh, good, now he's gonna

puke out all the bad stuff.

- You see?

- But in front of the shop?

Hi. Sorry.

Wait, what's he doing now?

Oh, nice, nice. Pee.

- You guys are so weird.

- It all came out in my pee.

Yeah.

Is his pee making it do that?

Thank God for my bladder.

Okay, good. Would you just finish

and come inside?

Alma, I owe you one.

Let's test it out. Let's test it out.

Let's test it out.

Is it warping the image still?

- No. No.

- No? No?

- It worked. It's working.

- I'm demagnetized, you're a genius.

- Thanks to me.

- You saved my life.

- Hi, guys.

- Hi, Mr. Jack.

- What are you looking at?

- Oh, nothing.

We were just closing up, actually.

Yeah, so there it is.

I have to pay in mostly pennies.

That's okay?

- Fine. That's... That's okay.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

- Enjoy the movie.

Your pennies are always good here.

I'm gonna enjoy it, thank you.

Good night.

- Enjoy the movie?

- Yeah, enjoy the movie.

We worked hard on it.

It's gonna be good.

Yo, we gotta find new tapes.

We're gonna get caught.

- We can't keep doing this.

- What are you talking about?

It's going fine. So far, so good.

What? When Miss Falewicz

sees "Ghostbusters"?

- Our version is better than the original.

- She's gonna say something...

...to Mr. Fletcher. First of all,

our version is only 20 minutes.

Yeah, but 20 minutes,

it's all the brain can concentrate for.

It's the perfect duration.

It's a biological fact.

- I study this, I know.

- Yeah.

And besides, Miss Falewicz has never seen

a science-fiction movie before.

She might think all of them are 20 minutes

long. And isn't she a little kooky?

She probably won't even recognize us.

Y'all need to chill out, all right?

Craig?

- What's up, old lady?

- Yo, come on in, guys.

Yo, Craig. What's up, man?

Dude, you gotta check this out, man.

My auntie got this

from Fats' video store.

This is Ghostbusters.

- Roshambo.

- Water.

- Laser.

- Water.

- Whoa. Uh-oh.

- Oh, no.

Miss Falewicz gave it to her nephew.

It looks like they were disappointed

with the video.

- Come on, guys.

- Do they have guns?

I can clearly see you

hiding behind the counter.

We was closed,

something's wrong with these lights.

- What's wrong with you?

- Nothing.

Y'all open now.

That wasn't bad. What else y'all got?

- The whole store.

- No. No.

We actually...

We only have Rush Hour 2.

No, man, he said the whole store.

- Why you lie to me, man?

- I'm not lying.

Guys, make your choice.

- What is wrong with you?

- It just came out.

What you got?

Right. Yeah, that's for...

Hey, man, hand me one of them

little mint jump off, right there.

We'd love to rent you out

these videos today...

...but Mr. Fletcher, right, he called.

- Oh, yeah.

- We got the new policy.

Two videos per day, per account, so...

All right then,

let me open an account right now.

Yeah, man. Sign away.

We're gonna need your picture ID,

your phone bill...

...your last three rent receipts,

your grades...

...a letter from your mother

if you're a minor...

...the last three countries

you visited prior to this trip...

...your 10 favorite films

and your blood type.

You know, you're real lucky

we don't beat up girls.

- Word.

- For real.

Except Craig's aunt.

Shut up, stupid.

We'll be back

with all the necessary documents.

We still have two to choose, right?

Here you go,

you pick two of those and we'll be...

That's my choice.

- You guys pick the other one.

- No, no, no.

You get to pick your choice,

and we gotta fight over ours?

- Yeah.

- What kind of democracy is that?

Man, who told you

this was a democracy?

Hey, hey, you guys, you guys.

You guys, listen. You guys!

Life without civilization is brutal...

... nasty and short.

If you're gonna come around here...

...and spread pizza

all over the walls with gats...

...you're gonna miss out

on some good movies.

So this is what I'm saying.

I'm gonna put all of these videos

into this bag.

Alma, you're gonna pick out

two of these videos at random.

Totally random.

It's the only way to do it civilized.

And everyone will survive. Pick it out.

Shake it, shake it, shake it.

- Here they are.

- These are your choices.

Done.

How the hell?

Okay, who's the baby

that picked The Lion King? Hm?

Someone did.

- What?

- Yeah.

But we will have them for you

at 4 p.m. tomorrow...

...as long as you give us

$20 right now.

Twenty dollars?

Yo, that's a complete rip-off.

No, no, no.

These are custom made. Sweded.

- Sweded.

- It's a very rare type of video.

- Swede? Like Sweden?

- Yeah, Sweded.

- It's a country, not a verb.

- Exactly. That's why it's expensive.

Because it's a faraway,

expensive country.

- It's imported.

- Sweded.

A toast. Twenty bucks in one day.

That's never happened at Be Kind Rewind.

- That's never happened. Never.

- Never happened at all?

- Nice with the civilization theory.

- Right?

- I gotta say, that was nice.

- I pulled that out.

I do some thinking at night.

If I can't sleep,

I'm just thinking about stuff.

- Who picked The Lion King?

- That's what I was wondering.

The big guy, maybe.

One of those guys picked The Lion King.

It was me.

- You snuck it in there?

- Yeah.

You're a badass.

See, well, Pocahontas used to be,

like, my favorite movie, right?

But then I couldn't find it

when you got the bag idea...

...soI just picked Lion King instead.

It is such a good movie too.

I cry every time when the father dies.

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