Beau Geste Page #2

his Knights of the Round Table.

How do you play that?

Well, I'm

King Arthur.

First, you put me

in this suit of armor...

Aunt Pat

wouldn't like that.

I'll take the blame

if she finds out.

Digby,

you're Sir Lancelot.

John, you're Sir Gawaine.

Isobel is Queen Guinevere.

And, Gussie,

you can be Sir Mordred.

Who's Sir Mordred?

He's the knight

who betrayed King Arthur.

Oh, I like that.

Digby, John, and Gussie will

have to get swords and helmets.

Now, help me into this

suit of armor before you go.

Can you manage?

l... I think so.

Oh! Oh.

We'll be back

in a minute, Sire.

Can you breathe

all right?

Fairly well.

Go, my people!

That will be all,

Burdon.

Ram Singh.

Aunt Pat!

Well, there goes

our king.

Thank you,

Ram Singh.

Beau, Beau,

are you all right?

Yes. Help me out.

What was that man with the

towel on his head doing here?

I don't know.

You were close enough

to hear what he was saying.

Oh, I suppose

I'll have to tell you.

He was from the Arabs.

He wanted me to fight on their

side against the Foreign Legion.

And... and he asked

Aunt Pat if I could go.

What did Aunt Pat say?

Well... well, no.

It sounds like a big lie

to me, John.

Just a moment, Digby.

Are you doubting

the word of King Arthur?

Why, no, Sire.

Are you, John?

I didn't say

a word, Sire.

Excuse me.

I hope I'm not intruding.

Oh, no, Aunt Pat.

We were just...

Please go on, Isobel.

May I?

Aren't you a little old for

those childish games, Beau?

Aren't you a little young for

those grown-up cigars, Gussie?

Is he still there?

Yes. Don't make

so much noise.

What's the difference? He

knows we're after him now.

All right.

Then let's get to work.

Let's not act hastily.

This requires

some preparation.

All we need to do

is move the couch.

He'll move fast.

We gotta watch out for him.

Well, one of us

on each side.

And have him walk out

right between us?

I can see you haven't done much

of this sort of thing, Digby.

Now, you move the couch

and I'll cover the ground.

The minute he shows his head,

I'll be on him like a tiger.

Now look, I flushed him,

I stood watch while

you armed yourself.

It's up to you

to move the couch.

Sorry, old boy,

I don't see it your way.

Well, then we'll need a

third party to move the couch

while we do the dirty work.

John.

No, he's too busy.

We can't disturb him.

What's more important

than this?

When you get a little older

you'll realize. Love.

Love?

You mean he's in love

with Isobel?

Horribly. Worst case

I've ever seen.

Well, he has

my blessing.

Here he comes!

Cute little fellow,

isn't he?

Probably been here

for years.

Has a family, too,

I suppose.

Well, go ahead, Beau.

After all, it's your room.

It must be your mouse.

Digby, we can't go down

and face all the others

with blood all over

our hands, can we?

No.

Remind me tonight to bring

him up some cheese, will you?

Did you have fun?

Think of him

behind that couch.

Same form of rodent.

Thank you.

The Gestes are

such witty fellows

to themselves.

Ghastly!

If I could only...

Shush!

Don't argue with

the heir, Digby.

Thank you.

A telegram.

First one in 5 years.

Who's it for,

Burdon?

Her Ladyship, sir.

I wonder if anything's

happened to Sir Hector.

Now, please don't start

reciting the will, Gussie,

until we find out

definitely.

Telegram, Madam.

Oh, thank you,

Burdon.

Sir Hector is well,

I trust?

Quite well, Augustus.

And we are going to have

a visit from him.

Oh.

That's splendid.

I don't understand.

He never comes home

this time of year.

Only because he's

never needed money

at this time of the year

before, Augustus.

Well, I don't see what more he

expects to get out of the estate.

You forget the Blue Water.

Why, he wouldn't sell the

Blue Water, would he, Aunt Pat?

I'm afraid that's

what he intends doing.

Why, there wouldn't be

anything left!

Excuse me.

Aunt Pat,

would you show us

the Blue Water before you go?

We may not get

another chance to see it.

Very well. Burdon.

Yes, Madam?

Will you come to the Priests'

Refuge with me, please?

And bring a candle.

Yes, Madam.

Well, why are we

all so glum?

Selling the Blue Water isn't

the end of everything, is it?

It is for Gussie.

Poor Aunt Pat.

She probably doesn't mind

losing the Blue Water.

It's having Sir Hector

around again.

Well, that's a splendid way

to talk about your benefactor.

Where would you be

if it weren't for him?

I don't know, Ghastly,

but not with you, at any rate.

We couldn't quietly arrange

to dispose of Sir Hector

in some way before

he gets home, could we?

Oh, nothing gory,

of course.

Thank you,

Burdon.

It looks like a piece of sky

that had become solid,

with sunlight

imprisoned in it.

Cold sunlight.

Cold as the unhappiness

it has brought so many people.

Well, must have blown a fuse.

Isobel, you're the closest.

Try the switch.

So somebody

turned them off.

Another Geste joke?

It's... It's gone!

Why... why,

it's impossible!

Somebody in this room

took it.

Now, don't be any more of an

ass than you can help, Ghastly.

There's no one in this

room but the family. Well?

It seems there's

someone here

with a sense of humor

all his own.

Your joke, Augustus?

Me? No, Aunt, really.

l... I swear it.

You, John?

No, Aunt Pat.

Digby?

Positively not.

Beau?

I didn't take the Blue Water.

Surely not...

Oh, no, Aunt.

I'm very much afraid

someone is lying.

Put it back, John.

I said

I didn't take it.

Suppose you put it back.

Suppose you do.

Whatever the humor

of the joke,

it's rather bad taste

to prolong it.

I think

we're agreed on that.

Perhaps our humorist

wouldn't mind

returning the Blue Water

the way he got it,

in the darkness.

Turn off the lights,

Isobel.

Turn them on, Isobel.

I was trying to catch the thief. So was I.

Whoever took the Blue Water

has had his chance.

I don't want a scandal

in Brandon Abbas.

I will leave the box

on the table until morning.

If the Blue Water

is not back by then,

of course, I shall have

to call the police.

Good night.

Have we

a magician here?

Or is Brandon Abbas

haunted?

Well,

there's Augustus.

What about you?

Please don't quarrel.

Somebody's just joking.

You don't joke

about 30,000 pounds.

But this is dreadful.

It's got to be a joke.

You go to bed, Isobel.

We know it wasn't you.

Gussie,

I hate to do this,

but it's necessary.

Now, then, n-n-n-now,

wait a minute!

Now... now, wait a minute!

Wait a minute! l... I...

Wouldn't it be wonderful

if he really did have it?

Be sure and look

in his mouth, Digby.

You know, I'm really very sorry

you didn't have it on you, Ghastly.

I wish I could search you.

I'd wager I'd find

the Blue Water.

And if one of you is to blame,

then all of you are

because you always

stick together.

Well, what's

the next step?

We all search

each other?

No, if I have

a brother who's a thief,

I'd rather not know

about it

till he sends me

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