Billy

---

Dad?

It's okay, Dad.

Lynn will be back soon.

Good evening, listeners

and welcome to...

Haven't you got any money?

He's known as the Maori comedian

with that famous laugh...

and widely recognised as one of

NZ's most loved entertainers.

Billy T James lies gravely ill

in hospital tonight.

The Kaikohe Police Station

was burgled last night.

The burglars took the toilet.

The cops said today that they've

got nothing to go on.

Billy received a heart transplant

over a year ago.

However,

complications have meant...

that he checked into Auckland's

Greenlane Hospital, this afternoon.

The tests are conclusive, Billy.

The fever you caught

has damaged your new heart.

It's beyond repair.

Well, how long

have I got, then, doc?

We can't be sure.

You know, I had a mate

in the same situation.

Yeah, the doc came in and said,

'I've got some good news,

and I've got some bad news,'

Billy.

'The good news is...

you've only got 24 hours to live'.

'Oh, hell, doc,' my mate reckons,

'What's the bad news?'

The doc says,

'Should've told you yesterday'.

I'll check on you again shortly.

Yeah.

Lynn,...

when it happens,

no tangi, okay? I, um... I can't stand

the thought of all those strangers...

staring at me for days on end.

But they're your whanau.

What do you want, Billy?

I wanna be at home,

at our home.

Then that's what's happening.

How are you holding up, Dad?

I told your Mum

not to name him after me,

but she went ahead,

and look what happened.

Jesus got us mixed up

and took the wrong Bill.

He looks so handsome.

At peace now, aren't you, love?

Whano, whano.

Haramai te toki! Haumie,

hui-e, taikie!

Ngara mai matou mo Billy.

No, no, no. You get out of here.

Kao! Kaore e tukuna e au.

Puta atu koutou ki waho.

They want our Billy.

- Hey!

- No, don't! Don't!

No, no, no, no!

You've got it wrong!

He's going to the marae

after the service at St. Matthews.

We had an agreement!

This is what Billy wanted!

It doesn't matter

what Billy wants any more.

Kati!

- That's my boy!

- Cherie, call the police!

Not my boy!

Hikitia.

That's my brother!

Billy!

Hands off him!

That's my son!

Hui-e,

taiki-e!

Haramai, Cherie.

Cherie?

What is going on?

They're his whanau.

Now he's dead, they're his whanau!

They love him too.

They have no right to do this!

Billy wanted to be here with us.

He has to go home.

Oh God.

# I say mony.

# Yeah.

# Mony.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah. Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Mony, mony.

# Mony, mony.

# Mony, mony.

# I said come on, come on, come on.

# Mony, mony. Mony, mony.

# Mony, mony. Mony, mony.

# Gonna feel all right now.

# Mony, mony.

# I said yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah.

# Yeah. #

I'm William Taitoko.

Thank you very much!

- You enjoying it?

- Yeah.

Whoo-hoo, it's William Taitoko!

Hey, can I have your autograph?

- Bill!

- CROWD CHEERS

You should get back up there.

Okay, okay, How about

that Mick Jagger, right?

His lips are so big...

is he a Maori or what?

Not as big as Billy's lips,

though, eh, mate?

Lynn.

I've been summoned.

I'll see you after the gig.

You remind that bugger

you finished work at 5.

So, what did your boss want?

Don't tell me he tried to have

his wicked way with you.

Well, he didn't sack you, did he?

He said I shouldn't be seen

with Billy.

And he's damn right.

Everyone knows musicians

are nothing but...

sex maniacs and drug addicts.

Leave it out, cuz.

He doesn't like Billy

'cos he's a hori, right?

If you're sticking with Billy,

you better get used to it.

This whole country

is full of rednecks.

Now, kids,

make sure you use protection.

# Well, you called me your baby

# when you hold my hand.

# Oh, honey, you hurt me.

# I just don't understand.

# I just don't understand.

# I just don't understand. #

Here we are, my lady.

There must be other hotels

you can play at, Billy.

I mean, you're the best.

There's just no one else

hiring at the moment.

Well, we can't let him

get away with this.

What do you want me to do?

I'm... I'm an entertainer.

It's just not right.

Hey.

I love you, you know that?

I love you too.

Then will you marry me?

Are you being funny?

I, um... I wouldn't have you on

about something like this.

Oh.

Then, yes...

I'll marry you.

# I looked into the sky.

# Everything was high,

# higher than it seemed

# to be to me.

# Standing by the sea,

# thinking I was free.

# Did I hear you call

or was I dreaming then, St. Paul?

Relax. Mum thinks you're the best thing

that's ever happened to me.

Yeah, that's before she knew

I was marrying you.

She'll be overjoyed.

How do you know?

We've been on at Billy for months.

Told him if he didn't hurry up

and ask,

you'd get bored and run away,

didn't we, Wiri?

He can be a bit shy.

Nah, just used to being talked over.

Oh.

We never thought much of those

other girls he used to bring home.

Really?

There weren't that many.

Groupies. You know the type...

short skirts and foul mouths.

Lynn doesn't wanna hear

about that, mum.

There was that Maori girl, though.

You remember the one, Wiri.

You knew her uncle.

She was nice, but, oh dear,

hadn't been out of the pa for long,

that's for sure.

How's the music going, son?

It's okay.

More than okay.

Go on, tell them.

More good news?

I've been asked to audition

for the Maori Volcanics.

With the hottest show band in the country.

Well, that's blimmin' great, son, eh?

It's just an audition.

Well, I don't know how you expect

to support a wife by playing music.

Oh, I'm not gonna be

giving up work, Ruby.

Then what about children?

Mum!

We've decided to wait.

Wait for what?

The world to end?

Kei te pai raua.

Just hope I don't die before I get

to see these mokopuna of mine.

Well, don't give up on me

just yet, mum.

I took your advice, and I applied

to become a traffic cop.

And I got accepted.

Oh, why didn't you say so?

Do you hear that, Wiri?

I can just see him in his uniform.

As long as he doesn't give me

a bloody ticket, eh?

He's really talented,

you know, Ruby.

Oh, I know he's talented.

The music's in his blood.

Did he tell you he was adopted?

A whangai?

He didn't say much.

His mother, Sally, was a cousin.

Oh, there were so many kids.

Hello.

What's your name?

Ko wai koe?

You've come to take Baby?

Ay.

Baby's coming to live with us.

You don't have to worry about that.

I told them I can look after that

little baby, so youse can go home now.

Is that Jimmy playing?

Smooth.

Oh, he's smooth alright.

That's how come

I've got ten kids.

Eh, Timi.

We only want the best for the baby.

We will love your baby,

with all our hearts.

Jimmy.

It's... time.

E hine.

Where did you hide the baby?

- I told you the old man was good, ey?

- Yeah.

Back when I was a kid,

whenever our cousins

got a... music lesson,

they shared what they learnt

with the rest of us.

Everyone could play something.

Ever think about

taking your music further?

Nah, no one went professional

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