Birdman Page #15

The waiter pockets the money and gives Riggan the drink. He

walks it over to Tabitha and places it down in front of her. Not

looking up, she pulls the drink closer and takes a sip.

Riggan sits down across from her. She looks up and immediately

recognizes him. He takes out the Carver cocktail napkin and

pushes it in front of her. She looks at him, and then down to

the napkin. She reads it in silence.

RIGGAN (CONT'D)

(Re:
The napkin.)

That was twenty years before I put on that

damned costume.

A pause. Then she pushes the napkin back toward him.

TABITHAI don't care.

RIGGANI'm just saying, when you come tomorrow

night, I want you--

TABITHAIt doesn’t matter.

RIGGANWhat are you--

TABITHAI'm going to destroy your play.

RIGGANYou haven't even seen it. I don't-- Did I

do something to offend you?

TABITHAAs a matter of fact you did. You took up

space in a theater which otherwise might

have been used on something worthwhile.

RIGGANBut you don't even know if it's--

TABITHAThat’s true. I haven't read a word of it,

or even seen a preview, but after the

opening tomorrow I'm going to turn in the

worst review anybody has ever read. And I'm

going to close your play. Would you like to

know why? Because I hate you. And everyone

you represent. Entitled. Spoiled. Selfish.

Children. Blissfully untrained, unversed

and unprepared to even attempt real art.

Handing each other awards for cartoons and

10/29/14 / 91.

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

pornography. Measuring your worth in

weekends. Well, this is the theater, and

you don't get to come in here and pretend

you can write, direct and act in your own

propaganda piece without going through me

first. So, break a leg.

Tabitha goes back to her writing. Riggan sits for a moment.

RIGGANWhat has to happen in someone's life,

for them to end up becoming a critic?

She looks up at him.

RIGGAN (CONT’D)

Whatcha writin’? You reviewin’ a play? Was

it good? Bad? Did you even see it? Lemme

read.

He snatches the notebook from her.

TABITHAI will call the police.

RIGGANNo you won’t. Let’s read your review!

(He scans the notebook.)

“Callow”. A label. “Lackluster”. Label.

“Marginalia”. Sounds like you need

penicillin to clear that up. None the

less... label.

(Looks to Tabitha.)

All labels. You’re a lazy f***er

aren’t you?

(Looks one last time at

the notebook.)

Epistemological vertigo?

Tabitha wants to reach for the notebook, but her pride won’t

let her. Riggan takes a flower from a vase at the center of the

table.

RIGGAN (CONT’D)

You know what this is? You don’t, do

you? You can’t even see it if you don’t

label it. You mistake those sounds in

your head for true knowledge.

TABITHAAre you finished?

RIGGAN(Wrinkling one of the pages.)

Nothin’ about intention, structure,

10/29/14 / 92.

TABITHA (CONT'D)

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

technique. Just crappy opinions backed

up by crappy comparisons. You’re

incapable of writing more than a couple

of paragraphs, and you risk nothing of

yourself.

(He tears out the page and tosses

the notebook.)

Well, I’m an actor and this play has

cost me everything. So you can take

your cowardly, malicious, shittily

written reviews and shove them up

your... (Showing her the wrinkled

page.) ...wrinkly, tight ass.

Riggan wears a proud smile. And suddenly, Tabitha begins to

smile with him.

TABITHAYou think you’re an actor?

(Calls to the waiter.)

Eddie!

Eddie the waiter approaches the table.

WAITERYeah, Mrs. Dickinson?

TABITHAGive us some Shakespeare.

WAITERNo problem. Got anything in mind?

Tabitha looks over at Riggan picking the perfect verse.

TABITHAThe Scottish Play. Act five...

WAITERTomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,

Creeps in this petty pace from day to

day, To the last syllable of recorded

time; And all our yesterdays have lighted

fools. The way to dusty death...

He is brilliant. The monologue is perfectly played and powerful.

Riggan being mercilessly reminded of his mediocrity... by Eddie

the waiter.

WAITER (CONT'D)

...Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a

walking shadow, a poor player, That

struts and frets his hour upon the

stage, And then is heard no more. It is

10/29/14 / 93.

RIGGAN (CONT'D)

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

a tale told by an idiot, full of sound

and fury... Signifying nothing.

A few drunks clap at the beautiful performance. Then, a powerful

silence rings out for a moment, until...

TABITHAThank you, Eddie.

WAITERYou got it.

TABITHA(To Riggan. A derisive laugh.)

You're no actor. You're a celebrity.

Let's be clear on that.

Tabitha rises from her seat and grabs her things.

TABITHA (CONT’D)

I'm going to kill your play.

She walks away. Riggan sits numb. After a moment, he reaches

over and gulps down Tabitha's entire martini, gin pouring out

the sides of his mouth. Unaware, he slams the empty martini

glass on top of the Carver napkin and gets up. We follow him

out onto...

EXT. STREET - CONTINUOUS4949...the street, where he walks through the theater district.

Tired. Drunk. Empty. Neon lights all around him. A crazy, old

homeless man passes by in the opposite direction shouting

furiously. Riggan keeps walking until he arrives at a bench,

with a tree behind. Everything is quiet. Riggan sits on the

bench, lost. We begin to tilt up, slowly, toward a tall tree.

We move closer into the branches and the green leaves.

Silence.

A49A49Night turns into day. The sounds of the city disappear and

birds begin to sing. The branches now caressed by golden shafts

of morning sun. Finally, we tilt down slowly and find...

EXT. STREET - DAY.5050...Riggan still sleeping on the bench. He looks like a bum. His

raincoat is dirty and wet.

10/29/14 / 94.

WAITER (CONT'D)

(CONTINUED)

BIRDMAN (V.O.)

God. You look like sh*t, brother. You

get that mongoloid look when you're hung

over, don't you?

Riggan opens an eye. He scratches his hair.

BIRDMAN (V.O.)

Let's go. Get up. It's a beautiful day.

Riggan sits up slowly. He is really hung over.

BIRDMAN (V.O.)

Stand up! Forget about the times. Everyone

else has. So you're not a great actor...

Who cares?!! You're much more than that.

F***! You tower over all these theater

douchebags. You're a movie star! A Global

force! Don't you get it?

Riggan stands up and begins to stumble forward. We pan around

to find Birdman (a stronger Riggan wearing a cool Birdman

outfit), following behind him.

BIRDMANYou spent your whole life building a

reputation and a bank account, and now

they're both blown. So what? F*** it. We

make a come back. Something huge. Take what

belongs to us. Take back the spotlight.

Magazine covers and billboards. Happy meals

with Birdman dolls. Remember that? That’s

who you are. That’s who we are!

Riggan just marches on. People and cars pass by, but nobody

notices Birdman. Riggan tries to ignore him.

BIRDMAN (CONT'D)

C'mon, buddy. Tell me we're going back

to the big leagues. Let’s do this.

Shave off that pathetic goatee, and put

the mask back on! Batman my balls.

We’ll start a new franchise. Birdman:

Phoenix Rising. Trust me! A billion

world wide. Swear to God.

A50A50Riggan keeps walking. Birdman, insistent, chases, until

suddenly he begins to flutter off the ground.

BIRDMANDo you hear me? You can do anything! You’re

an icon!

10/29/14 / 95.

(CONTINUED)

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