Birdman Page #2

RIGGANForget the understudy. We have to postpone

the preview.

JAKEWhat are you-- It’s a full house. We would

have to refund all the--

RIGGANThen do it.

A crew member· passes in the opposite direction.

CREW MEMBER·

How’s Ralph?

RIGGANHe’ll be fine.

JAKEWait. Wait. F***. Wait.

RIGGANListen to me. It was going to be a

disaster. That guy’s the worst actor I've

ever seen. The blood coming out of his ear

was the most honest thing he's done so far.

JAKEHe's not that bad.

Riggan stops in his tracks and stares at Jake.

JAKE (CONT'D)

Okay, he's f***ing horrible. But--

Riggan starts walking again.

JAKE (CONT’D)

You have the press in your dressing

room in a few hours. How are we--

RIGGANI'll make something up.

Two Technicians· hurry up in the opposite direction.

RIGGAN (CONT’D)

Jake. This happened for a reason. It wasn't

an accident.

JAKEWhat do you mean?

10/29/14 / 7.

(CONTINUED)

RIGGANI-- (A beat.) I made it happen.

JAKEOh. Okay.

(Beat.)

Are you drunk?

RIGGANFind me an actor. A good actor.

Philip Seymour Hoffman...

JAKEHe’s doing the third Hunger Games.

RIGGANMichael Fassbender?

JAKEDoing the prequel to the X-Men

prequel.

They arrive at Riggan's dressing room.

RIGGANWhat’s his name? Jeremy Renner...

JAKEWho?

RIGGANThe... the Hurt Locker guy.

JAKEYeah. He’s an Avenger.

RIGGAN(With disgust.)

F***. They put him in a cape, too?

(A beat.) Look, I don’t care. Find

me someone.

Riggan enters...

INT. RIGGAN'S DRESSING ROOM - THEATER - CONTINUOUS55...his dressing room and tries to shut the door. Jake, still in

the corridor, stops it with his foot.

JAKE(Sticking his head in.)

Ralph'll sue us. He'll sue us. And he's got

a case.

10/29/14 / 8.

(CONTINUED)

Riggan releases the door.

RIGGANThen make him go away.

JAKEHow do you suggest I do that?

RIGGANYou're my lawyer, my producer and

my oldest friend. We are going to

make this work. Now just get out

there and do what you were born to

do.

JAKEWhat's that?

RIGGANI have no idea. But I have faith.

Now go away from me.

JAKEDo you think we should--

Riggan slams the door shut on Jake. A beat. On a television, a

segment of E! News. A busty blond, with an exaggerated smile,

hosts.

BLOND WOMAN...and when we come back, an exclusive

interview with Robert Downey Jr., who tells

us about the billion-dollar Iron Man

franchise. The talented actor invited us

onto the set of Iron Man 3...

Riggan slams the tv off, his mind racing. He sits on a chair.

MAN (V.O.)

That clown doesn’t have half your talent

and he’s making a fortune in that Tin Man

get up.

Riggan stares into the mirror, in the reflection he catches

sight of a poster from a movie called "Birdman 3". The

superhero, Birdman (a younger Riggan in a bird costume), wings

widely spread, stares directly back at him. A hand written

note on the top of the poster reads: "Thomson, break a wing!

From the boys at Local 1." Riggan tries to calm himself with a

mantra...

RIGGAN"Breathing in, I embrace my anger.

Breathing out, I smile to it."

10/29/14 / 9.

(CONTINUED)

BIRDMAN (V.O.)

Embrace it. Kiss it. Turn it around and

f*** it in the--

A knock on the door behind him.

RIGGANNot now!

Laura opens the door and sticks her head in.

LAURACan I come in?

RIGGANNo.

LAURAOkay. Two words. Shia La Beouf.

RIGGANThat's three words.

LAURAIt's two.

RIGGANGet out.

LAURAI love you.

She closes the door. Riggan tries to calm himself down, but

Laura opens the door again.

LAURA (CONT'D)

I take it we’re not going to dinner

anymore?

RIGGANI don’t have an actor.

LAURAI don’t have a life.

RIGGANLaura...

LAURAFine. Whatever.

(Goes to leave but stops.)

You remember at Joan's when you

asked me to come do a Broadway play

with you? You said it would be

fun...

10/29/14 / 10.

(CONTINUED)

RIGGANGo away.

LAURASo far? No fun.

Riggan closes the door and looks at the Birdman poster.

BIRDMAN (V.O.)

Fun? You know what would be fun? Getting

the f*** out of here before we humiliate

ourselves. That would be fun.

Riggan looks at himself in the mirror and begins to pull at

his hair. As it comes off his head, we discover it was a wig.

He turns away from the mirror, trying desperately to stay

calm. Something catches his eye: a vase of roses on the end

of the table. A card in them says, "They didn't have the

whatever you wanted - Sam". Enraged, Riggan focuses on the

vase. It begins to shift. Then, with a surge of anger,

without ever touching it, he sends it crashing against the

wall on the other side of the room.

The camera pans over the roses scattered across the floor. It

hovers over the carpet and around the perimeter of the room,

until it finally settles on Riggan, now dressed in a casual

blazer.

A5A5It is later the same day. He is sitting on the sofa and on three

chairs in front of him are three journalists:

Gabriel, a geeky theatre journalist, wearing thick glasses and

a thin tie. Clara, a reporter from an entertainment blog. And

Han, a polite, obese Japanese journalist, who sits next to his

translator, another Japanese guy.

GABRIELWhy does somebody go from playing the lead

in a comic book franchise to adapting

Raymond Carver for the stage?

Riggan tries to remain calm.

GABRIEL (CONT’D)

I mean, as you're probably aware, Barthes

said, “The cultural work done in the past

by gods and epic sagas is now done by

laundry detergent commercials and comic

strip characters.” It's a big leap you've

taken...

Riggan shifts nervously.

10/29/14 / 11.

(CONTINUED)

RIGGANWell... Absolutely. As you said... that

Barthes said... Birdman, like Icarus...

CLARAHang on. Who's this Barthes guy? Which

Birdman was he in?

GABRIELRoland Barthes was a French philosopher,

who--

CLARAOh. Okay. Sure. Now, is it true you’ve been

injecting yourself with semen from baby

pigs?

RIGGANWhat?

CLARAAs a method of facial rejuvenation.

RIGGANWho told you that?

CLARAIt was tweeted by... (checks her notes)

@prostatewhispers.

RIGGANIt's a lie.

CLARAI know. But did you do it?

RIGGANNo!

GABRIELAre you afraid at all that people will say

you're doing this play to battle the

impression that you're a washed-up super

hero?

RIGGANNo. I’m not. And that’s exactly why

20 years ago I refused to do

Birdman 4.

HANBirdman 4??? You do Birdman 4???

Jake opens the door and the camera pans to him.

10/29/14 / 12.

(CONTINUED)

JAKEOkay. That's enough for today.

Thank you for coming. We’re

expecting some great pieces from

you...

Riggan stares at the Birdman poster.

JAKE (CONT’D)

Publicity guys are trying to get

you a Times feature.

Riggan stands up and pulls the Birdman poster off of the

wall.

JAKE (CONT’D)

So, How’d it-- Whoa. If I were you

I wouldn’t do that.

RIGGANI don’t want to look at it anymore.

JAKEThat was a present from the crew.

Don’t f*** with those guys, they’re

union.

RIGGANI don’t care.

Riggan leaves the poster on the floor, facing the wall, and

walks to the window. He opens it. We can hear distant drums

coming from the street.

JAKESo... How'd it go?

RIGGANGreat.

JAKE(Worried.)

Did they ask about Ralph?

RIGGANNope.

JAKEGood. He did it, you know? The

motherf***er threatened to sue us.

Didn’t even wait to get out of the

hospital.

RIGGANAnd, what did you say?

10/29/14 / 13.

(CONTINUED)

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