Black or White Page #2

Mm.

She's got a whole lot of family

down with me. Mm-hm.

I got my Kristen, and her cute little

gay family across the street.

And her darlin'

little music teacher wife.

Got two of my brother's girls

and my sister's boy.

- All on my dime.

- Go figure.

Well, you can always come visit,

come for a swim. How's that?

I know you don't like my boy.

I know you're still angry,

but this isn't about Reggie.

He's not in the picture.

This is about Eloise.

OK, got it.

Got it. Jeez...

Have a sandwich, Rowena.

Maybe a drink. All right?

Enjoy yourself.

I'd go somewhere and play some poker

if I was looking to enjoy myself.

Maybe a Lakers game.

Not here for a good time.

- It's a wake, remember?

- Fine.

Point taken.

Toothpaste, toothbrush,

in your mouth, now.

- What?

- Madder.

You gotta be madder at me

like you mean it.

Let me, uh...

Want me to just go out and start again?

Yeah.

Eloise, you brush those teeth!

I mean it.

Don't make me come in there

and have to say it twice.

Nice.

Aren't you going

to drive me to school?

Yes.

OK.

Morning.

You're in the third grade

and you're dealing...

You're in the third grade and you're

dealing with this level math?

I didn't deal with

this stuff until... ever.

Does that mean

you're not going to help me?

Of course not.

Not at all. Let's take a...

Let's take a shot at this.

I'm not very good at math, though,

all right? I'm a lawyer.

- You know what we're good at, right?

- What?

Nothing.

That was...

That was a joke.

Hi. I'm Duvan. Are you Elliott?

Yes, yes. Uh...

- Nice to meet you. Come on in.

- Thank you.

Come on in.

My rsum.

A list of my study courses.

A paper that I wrote

for the National Math Board

on systemic dysfunction

in proper Algebraic education.

That's good. This is good.

- You want a drink?

- I would... like a drink, yes.

OK, good.

What do you like? I got the works.

Oh, no, just a water, please.

And... another paper that I wrote.

In the flyer, my piano lessons.

I have a fall special that I'm currently

running that offers the piano lessons

half off when purchased with tutoring

in either math, science

or any of the eight languages

that I have listed there.

You sure you don't want a cocktail?

You're very, very qualified, Duvan.

That's good.

Because Eloise, she's special.

She lost her grandmother... my wife,

about three weeks ago in a car crash.

I don't want her to fall behind

in her studies.

- What about her mother?

- My daughter?

She died during childbirth.

She had congenital heart problems.

My wife and I weren't with her

at the hospital when she was born.

Weren't invited. Or included.

We, uh... We weren't called,

let's just put it that way.

The doctors weren't aware

of her medical history.

I lost my father, my grandfather

and two of my brothers.

Killed by murderers,

along with 300 others from my village.

I'm sorry.

A paper I wrote on literature's

effect on grief

for the library of the National

Endowment for Children's Literature.

I have also written a paper

on channeling our emotions

in a positive direction using meditation

and alternative grief counseling.

That's good, but there's gonna

be something else, all right?

It's not gonna be just Eloise.

It's gonna be me as well.

I'm gonna need a little tutoring

in math myself.

Is that gonna be a problem?

No, that will not be a problem at all.

I do, however, charge by the student.

Yeah, I'm sure you do.

Elliott, it's Rowena.

Now I need you to pick up that phone

and call me, baby.

I know you're in pain.

Your pain is my pain.

That little girl is my little girl. OK?

Pick up the phone. Call Wee Wee.

Call Wee Wee.

Kyle had 32 shells.

He gave eight to his friend.

- How many shells does Kyle have now?

- Eight to his friend?

Eight to his friend.

This might be a bit easier for you.

But write it down, please, both of you.

- No, I'm good.

- You sure?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm good.

So what's the deal with, uh,

Jonny Quest's sidekick?

- Where'd you find him?

- Craigslist.

- Oh, yeah?

- He's very good.

So what's going on?

What's so important you had to see me?

It's Reggie's mother.

You know who her baby brother is, right?

He's a senior partner

at that new firm over there on Flower.

She's got him threatening

to file a family court hearing

on custody of Eloise

unless you deal with her.

- Threatening or filing?

- Threatening, at this point.

Well, that's hilarious.

They don't know jack about family law.

They sue corporations, Rick.

They make billionaires beg.

They don't...

They don't do custody hearings.

Well, guess what, Elliott,

neither do we.

Have you thought about that?

Listen...

Do you really plan on raising this girl?

Full time?

I'm not being a dick. I'm just asking.

Are you sure you're up for this?

You know... raising a little

black girl all by yourself?

Little black... What the hell

does that mean? She's not black!

- All right? She's half black.

- All right.

She's also half white.

Which, by the way, what does that

have to do with anything?

That's the stupidest thing

you ever said to me. I expect that...

I expect that from Wee Wee, not you.

OK, well, technically,

she has just as many rights as you do.

Just enough to have it

brought up in a hearing.

So I suggest you go and talk it out with

her before she gets the state involved.

I'm telling you, Rowena's brother is

not somebody you wanna mess around with.

The guy has like six different degrees.

Well, you know how many degrees your

rectal thermometer has at home, Rick?

You know where

you put that thing? Sh*t.

These are the study papers

for the next time that we meet.

Can I go watch TV now,

since I worked on my homework?

Of course you can, but first,

say good-bye to Duvan.

- Bye, Duvan.

- Bye.

- Thank you, Elliott.

- Hey, Duvie, can I ask you something?

I know you offer a lot of services,

teach a lot of languages.

- Different skills, you know, sh*t.

- Yeah, I do.

Can you drive?

I mean, for some good money.

I'm not, um...

...capable of driving... right now.

Could you drive me around town

a little today?

Of course, I can do that.

Good. Good. Uh...

Don't tell me you've written a paper

on driving, though. Don't tell me that.

All the waiters

in your grand cafe

You do drive well, Duvan.

Thank you.

Um...

Where are we going?

South of downtown. South Central.

Have you been there?

No. No, I have not.

Probably seen it on television, though.

- CSI or something?

- I don't watch much television.

No, of course not.

I'm afraid, for me, it is not

a nourishing form of entertainment.

Maybe you should consider

curtailing the amount of hours

Eloise watches television.

OK. Got it. Good tip.

Let's get off at this exit here.

Right here.

Don't wait for answers

Just take your chances

Don't ask me why

Mm, you can say the human heart

is only make-believe

I am only fighting fire with fire

But you are still a victim

of the accidents you leave

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