Blonde Ambition Page #7

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to the Marina group.

Hi.

- Hi.

- Hi. Hi.

And so having thoroughly covered the

helicopter zoning addendum,

for the third time,

are there any further questions?

Ones that don't have anything

to do with helicopters?

Okay, so let me begin.

The brown area. The boulder, I assume?

Yes. Yes, and I am so glad

you brought that up. Thank you.

Of course, the boulder,

which has been a huge obstacle.

We believe destroying it with explosives

is the best alternative.

Blow it to high hell.

Could I get involved in that?

Yes, of course, absolutely.

So imagine it being gone.

As you can see by the data in front of you,

we have over 150 units,

starting with the base price of $600,000.

I appreciate the point

you're trying to make, son,

but you could show me all the figures

and numbers you want,

but the fact remains that if you don't

come up with a clever and very cheap idea

on how to get rid of

that big, fat boulder there,

then we don't have a deal.

We're actually running behind schedule,

- so could you please call the driver?

- Yeah, okay. Yeah.

Ladies and gentlemen...

- Ladies and gentlemen.

- This will only take a minute.

Okay. Sit down, sit down.

There's an old saying where I come from.

When the cow won't move,

best not try and push her.

- Did she say cow?

- I heard cow. Yes.

Yes, she did, ma'am.

The trick is to work with the cow

no matter how stubborn she is.

All of this time we've been approaching

this boulder as a roadblock.

There's actually another way to look at it.

Did you bring the rock?

Yeah. Excuse me.

Well, look how easy that was.

That was great. It didn't cost a dime.

Sorry, it's just not quite that simple.

We've kind of come up with another...

- Wow!

- Look at that.

We use the boulder and we turn it into

an extreme sports bonanza.

It can be used by visitors or residents.

There's rock climbing, bike paths,

anything you want.

Could you move it a little closer?

What was once a negative

has now become a positive.

Wait. How do people get up on that thing?

That's a very good question, actually.

A tram.

- A tram, of course.

- That would be perfect.

A tram. Then the fatties could run around

and lose weight and be healthy.

- Let's get back to the boulder.

- Yeah.

Because we know that this has been...

Excuse me.

Do you have to be a sailor to live there,

i.e., own a boat?

Good question.

Well, you don't have to be a sailor.

- Do you have to be a pirate?

- You have a Pirate's Cove pictured...

- That's just a theme.

- Like a theme park?

- We like theme parks.

- Yeah, that'd be nice. Yeah.

A great deal.

Snacks. We can have snacks.

Will people be required to wear

an eye patch?

No, there won't be any characters.

Yeah, theme parks are very nice.

Water slides?

Are you gonna put a water slide in?

I wanna do a cost benefit analysis

of your entire...

...on St. Patty's Day,

but that is just crazy.

Yeah, if you could go through that book.

It's the other book.

It would be the other book.

- Quiet! Everyone.

- I love helicopters.

So, Miss Stapleton.

Where did you get your MBA?

You've been misinformed.

I don't really follow basketball.

It's violent.

- Pretty little hairdo, huh?

- Thank you.

The jig is up, sister! You freak!

- Okay.

- You're all frauds, aren't you?

I knew it!

- Who are you people?

- This beard! This beard is fake!

- Chill out.

- It's real, it's real, it's real, it's real!

That's extremely important.

- Very good.

- Very good.

- Ben's gonna take over from here, okay?

- Okay, Ben.

Thank you, Miss Gregerstitch.

I'm gonna utilize a visual aid here.

You deceitful little tramp.

How dare you undermine me?

Well, I guess you did

teach me something, Debra.

I called security.

Get in there, Freddy!

Try me, Freddy.

Find another way in!

You don't have to yell at me!

Katie. You okay?

I've got this one taken care of.

- All right.

- Thanks, guys.

We were good, weren't we?

- We got you so good.

- Get out of here!

That was uncalled for.

Excuse me.

I'm right in the middle of a presentation.

Yes, excuse me. Thank you.

Hello. Please do not listen to this man.

Neither he nor she represents this firm.

They have misled you.

So before security comes to take...

Oh, good God!

What is that awful looking thing?

That is the extreme sports bonanza.

Oh, is it?

That's wonderful.

'Cause maybe that gimmicky crap

works out there in Milwaukee,

but not out here in the Big old Apple.

I've been to Milwaukee

and I like the hell out of this idea.

It's ingenious. It works.

It's better than we expected.

Perfect use of the boulder.

And, in fact,

I'm gonna give them the contract.

- You are?

- Yeah, why not? I like it.

Oh, no, no, no. No.

No. You must be kidding.

No, that's crazy.

You cannot take this person seriously

because she is just this little, small-town,

good-for-nothing, white trash bimbo.

You know, lady, in our company,

we have a name for somebody like you.

A mean person.

A little stronger than that.

A really mean person.

Why don't you just do it a little more?

B*tch.

That's the word.

Very good.

You have done it this time.

You know what? Maybe you're all right.

You know, I'm gonna... I'm gonna take

a closer look at this little creation.

- No...

- Here we go.

- Let me look at it.

- Please don't touch that.

Oh, look at that.

You know, it's so adorable.

It's so lovely. Wow.

You know what? On second look, it's just...

Oh, whoops. Oh, did I do that?

Look at that. And that. And that! And that!

Don't do that. No, don't do that.

Thank God. There she is.

That woman is trespassing. Oh, no, no, no.

Wrong person. No, not me!

- Oh, gosh. Gosh.

- Holy mother of pearl!

What are you doing to her?

- My queen!

- Please.

Get your hands off of her.

He hits like a girl.

You damn dirty apes!

- Louie, Donovan, get her out of here.

- Come on, let's go.

- No!

- Get her out of here!

I'm president! It's me, I'm the president!

I'm gonna be president!

No! No!

I never liked her.

Well, this has been a fun day.

Now, you two. Do we have a deal or what?

Actually, I think I know somebody

who deserves to close this deal

a lot more than me.

Is he gonna come from the ceiling?

- It's official.

- Congratulations and thank you.

Oh, it's my pleasure, dear.

You have some

very good people working here.

We do.

- And some not so good.

- Some not so good.

- They're very loud.

- I like loud.

Of course you do!

- Boss, some champagne?

- No. Champagne makes me cranky.

- How about whiskey in my office?

- Oh. Whiskey makes me frisky.

- To the office!

- It's down there to the left.

Oh, boy.

Well, hey, you did a really good job.

You did.

- You deserve some credit, too, you know.

- Thank you.

I almost forgot something very important.

This is the deed to the store in Minden.

My gift to you, with great gratitude

and affection. Thanks very much.

Thank you so much, Mr. Connelly.

- You're most welcome. You did a great job.

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