Blood Suckers from Outer Space Page #3

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Death, destruction, devastation.

That's all you military

people think about.

- What else did you

wimps have in mind?

- I have a proposal here for

a two year study

which has been broken down into

four independent stages.

- Studies are not worth a sh*t.

I have got weapons.

- How rude.

- I've got it!

- Those lunatics are gonna

screw it all up.

We've got to calm this thing down

before they do something drastic.

- Hey B.J., I think you're

a little confused

about what's going on here.

The public is in grave danger.

- Come on.

The public doesn't give a damn

about whether or not

they turn into Blood Suckers as

long as they have cable TV.

- Sure, maybe it's not so bad

being a Blood Sucker

from outer space.

But what about the people that

are gonna get sucked?

- Yeah, they don't even get to

be Blood Suckers.

They just get to be dead.

- We all have to make compromises.

That's what life's all about.

This is the most important

scientific discovery

since cancer.

We can't let it slip

through our fingers.

If they destroy this thing,

we'll probably all be sent to

do some ridiculous

medical research in some

place like Oklahoma.

- Okay, okay, you've

made your point

but I still think we

should've told

General Sanders about Dr. Pace.

- And have him shove

some hand grenade

down Dr. Pace's throat?

No way.

- This whole thing makes me

ready to get blown away.

Let's go to the supply room and

see what's on special.

I know there's some things we

haven't experimented with yet.

- Why do we always have

to use something

that hasn't even been tested on

laboratory animals?

There's no telling what

it's doing to us.

Let's try something

completely different.

- What do you mean?

- Let's go get drunk.

- I'm ready.

- Come on, Ralph,

you look like your brain could use

a good dose of alcohol.

- No thanks, I'm really not

feeling very well right now.

You two go ahead.

I think I'm gonna stay here and

lie down for awhile.

- This is it.

Thanks a lot for the ride.

- Maybe we could do it

again sometime?

- I'm ready for it.

Would you like to come in and look

at my stamp collection?

- I'd love to.

- You'll have to excuse the--

- Clutter?

- Yeah.

- Sit down.

- You live here alone?

- Yeah.

It's my grandmother's house.

She's in a nursing home

and I'm sorta holding

down the fort

until my uncle can decide

what he wants to do

with the place.

I've had a lot of good times here.

Been spending time here ever since

I was a little kid.

- Does your family live in town?

- My parents were killed

when I was five.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- My brother and I lived with

our aunt and uncle

until we were old

enough to escape.

- That bad, huh?

- Mhmm.

My uncle's insane and my aunt's

brain ceased to function

sometime shortly after birth.

- Well, what about your brother?

- I don't get to see

Ralph very much.

He's really wrapped up in his work

and right now he's involved

in some top secret government

project at Research City.

Hey, I don't know why I'm

doing this to you.

I'm getting really depressing.

- It's all right.

You're just being honest.

- You don't mind?

- Not at all.

Honesty is sort of a

curiosity for me.

It's so rare.

- Well, honestly,

right now I'm faced with a

major decision.

I can either keep doing

what I wanna do

and try to make some sense

out of all this,

in which case I'll lose all

outside financial assistance

or I can become a dairy farmer.

- I think you're making

something complicated

out of something

that's very simple.

- Maybe you're right.

I just have so many questions

about everything right now.

I'm confused.

- Well don't be confused.

There's only one answer to

all our questions.

- Bye the way, I'm Julie.

- I'm Jeff.

It's nice to meet you.

- So what do you think?

- I think it's time to redecorate.

Sh*t.

My uncle.

I'll be late.

He'll be pissed.

- Lawrence,

daddy's home and look what

he brought for you.

Blood plasma.

Lawrence?

Lawrence?

Lawrence?!

- Uncle Joe?

How's it going?

- Well, Jeff,

it's going great.

I've never felt better.

It's a new world and I'm enjoying

every minute of it.

I'm particularly interested

ininvesfigafing

this piece of farm machinery.

- Uncle Joe, are you all right?

- All right,

well no I'm not.

I'm better than all right.

I've found the answer

to everything.

- What happened? Did you

find Jesus or what?

- Oh, much more than that,

Jeff.

Very soon, you'll find it too.

- Is Aunt Kate in the house?

- Yes, I believe she's in

the house cooking supper.

I don't think you

should go in there.

The place is a mess.

- I'm gonna go see Aunt Kate.

- Go on in.

I'll be in directly.

- Okay, I want you to stay out

here and keep and eye on him.

- No way in hell I'm gonna

stand out here.

Your uncle's insane!

- That's exactly why I

don't want you

to stay inside the house.

- You mean you think your aunt is?

- I think maybe he's

axed her to death

or beaten her to death with a

lamp or something!

- Jeff?

I think you better come in here.

- Oh god.

How could he do this?

- Jeff, I'm so

glad you made it.

I was so afraid you wouldn't come.

I've prepared a

wonderful meal for you.

- Looks like part of the

preparation took place in here.

- What did you say, Jeff?

- I said it looks like you

slaughtered a cow in

the living room!

- I'm sorry the house

is such a mess.

The funniest thing happened

this afternoon.

- Cut it out, Uncle Joe,

you're scaring me!

- Don't be scared, Jeff, I

won't hurt you.

- Get out of my way.

- I've got to keep you here.

Soon you'll be one with us

and then you'll understand.

- Understand what?

- I'm an entirely new creature,

Jeff.

Just relax.

- Don't tell me to relax!

You're monsters, both of you!

- Does this mean you're not

gonna stay for supper?

- Jeff, I think we're on the menu.

- I'm giving you

just one more chance

to get out of my way!

- Just be patient.

Very soon you'll be ready.

Ready to feel the urge

and then you'll love to

satisfy the urge.

Your upwards passion needs time,

you'll suck the warm life

from your prey,

holding it in your arms,

caressing it

as you suck, suck, suck.

- Why don't you make up your mind?

First you want me to be

a photographer

then you don't want me to

be a photographer.

Then you want me to be

a dairy farmer

then you don't want me to

be a dairy farmer

and now you want me to

become a Blood Sucker!

I can't deal with this!

- You cut my f***ing arm off.

- I've got a recipe for spaghetti

I know you'll love.

- First time, every time.

- General Sanders, I've prepared

these briefs for you.

- The whole world's gone insane.

Blood Suckers from outer space,

wimpy research scientists

and my wife spending my life

savings on a f***ing facelift.

And this coffee tastes like sh*t.

Why don't you sit down

and say something

instead of just standing there

like a goddamn Gomer Pyle?

I told you before, Harry,

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