Bloody Homecoming

I can't believe our school

throws homecoming

in the old gym.

Of all the shitty ways

to save a penny.

Come on, Loren.

Just be stoked

we're finally in high school

and can actually go this year.

So, it was your lame idea

to come to this stinky-ass

porta-potty of a party?

Wasn't it

Annie's sophomore boy toy

that had this brilliant idea?

Yeah.

Like you aren't aching

to see your own junior boy toy,

Jaclyn?

Yeah, Jaclyn.

Isn't Karl a little old for you?

Whatever.

Guys, put out that cigarette

before we all get detention.

Those sophomore bros

you guys hang out with

are a bunch of tools.

Ah, Steve, but they're tools

that can drive cars,

right, girls?

- Ugh. Jerks!

- It wasn't funny.

I know.

It was f***ing hilarious.

Loren, they won't let us in.

Hey, whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Sorry, freshmen.

No fishies allowed.

The dance

is for everyone, meathead.

- Move.

- Wow, Steve.

Your girl's

got some mouth on her.

Maybe you should, uh,

put something in there,

- uh, shut her up.

- Hey, hey, hey.

Come on, guys.

They're with us.

So, what?

We just decided...

we don't want any sophomores

allowed in here either.

But, you know,

we may, uh, reconsider

if you give us

that, uh, Spirit Baton.

Yeah, right.

Sophomores won it

fair and square.

Well, I guess

you ain't getting in then.

Real mature.

Man, you got

to be kidding me.

Sorry, Karl.

Looks like you

and your little fishie buddies

have to find another pond

to go swim in.

- Aw, hell with this.

- Karl.

Dude, wait up.

That was perfect.

Yeah.

20 bucks?

To guarantee you

and all three of your friends

- get laid tonight?

- That was the deal.

Sorry, Billy.

Price just tripled.

It's still worth it.

Hey, Billy.

Give it to her good.

Karl, man.

Dude, come on, man.

Just chill.

Okay.

Yeah, forget them.

It's not worth it.

What?

I say y'all

should've kicked their butts.

I didn't get all fine like this

for nothing.

Yeah. They're, uh, senior

linebackers there, Jackie.

You fight them,

you fight the whole team.

Guys, it's over.

Can we just get the hell

out of here now?

Yeah. Maybe we should

just call it a night.

Wait, where's Billy?

I'm right here.

I think everyone wants to go.

Wait...

guys... The party

is just getting started.

Geez, Billy.

Where'd you get that?

Don't worry about it.

We can't just booze it up

in the courtyard.

Who said anything

about boozing it up

in the courtyard?

I don't know

if this is such a good idea.

Actually, it's a great idea.

Good job, Billy.

Maybe you're not as much

of a dry spot as I thought.

Thanks... I think.

Come, darling.

Let's dance.

All right, class.

Attention.

Yes, miss Russell.

I would like each of you all

to write a three-page report

on Shakespeare's

"taming of the shrew"

and why it's such

a chauvinistic piece of...

how about I tame

your shrew?

Hey.

That's my line.

Hey, I need

to show you something.

Geez, Billy.

Where'd all this come from?

My brother, he hooked me...

he hooked us up

for our one-month anniversary.

That's really sweet,

but come on.

One month

isn't much to celebrate.

Are you kidding me?

This has been the happiest month

of my entire life.

- What's wrong?

- Nothing.

I mean, I've had a lot of fun

with you, too.

Just I'm not ready

for... You know.

For what?

That thing in your pants

pressed against me right now.

And just, you know,

we're both really young,

and we have plenty of time,

so we should just...

I know.

Exactly.

We are young,

so we should take advantage

of every moment that we have.

Billy, I said no, okay?

Annie, I know you want to.

Come on. A little petting

once in a while is fine,

but you are drunk.

And can we please just go back

with everyone else?

You know, Annie,

you can be such

a ripe little tease sometimes.

And you can be a ripe a**hole.

You know what?

If you're gonna be

a little b*tch like that,

I got a real woman out there

that's willing to give it up

to me right now.

Go for it.

Now get your slimy hands off me!

What the hell is your problem?

Do you know

how much all of this cost?

I'm sorry.

You know what?

I think you need

to be taught a lesson.

Stop! No! Stop!

Stop!

Stop!

Please, just stop!

Stop it!

Come on. Go.

Loren, truth or dare?

Truth...

Billy is a real prick.

Holy sh*t.

What happened in there?

Are you guys okay?

Let me out!

Annie Morgan, you slut!

Let me out right now!

What did Billy do to her?

Nothing yet, but he tried.

Guys, I just want to go home.

Look, just give me the keys.

- I'll go talk to him.

- No.

You can't just leave him

locked in the closet.

Watch me.

Annie Morgan, open up this door!

Fire!

Guys, come on!

Please!

What's going on out here?

Oh, sh*t.

Shouldn't

you all be at the dance?

Those a**hole senior linemen

wouldn't let us into the dance,

principal Patterson.

You should have

reported that to us.

You guy

are not allowed out here.

Hey... hey, guys.

Allen,

what is going on over there?

Somebody get

a fire extinguisher!

Oh, it's hot!

Aah!

Sitting in my car

we used to all hang around

this park

we were so rebellious

that's what our parents

used to tell us

we didn't care

we thought we had forever

but we were unaware

- we were kids

- we were kids

- we were friends

- we were friends

I thought it would never end

well, I don't want it to end

teen angst

it's killing me now

no matter where I run

I won't be getting out

- woke up screaming in my bed

- woke up screaming

all the words I never said

teen angst

it's killing me now

As you can see,

our theme this year

is going up to amp up

the scheme of school colors

as you head your way

up the hall.

Isn't it wonderful?

We're all finally

having ourselves

a real homecoming

around here again.

No.

I think it's a huge mistake.

Well, don't you

think it's wonderful, coach?

Oh, it's wonderful,

all right.

Honey, can we keep focusing

on the task at hand?

It's nearly 9:
00, and we still

have two halls to judge.

Sorry, dear.

All right. We're done.

Thank God.

Can we leave now?

Hey, what are you doing tonight?

Oh, uh,

Karl's off in a few,

so I'll probably just head

over to the station.

Surprise, surprise.

Oh, come on.

It's not like you two

aren't up each other's butts

24/7, too, okay?

Vulgar.

True, but vulgar.

So, is Karl coming

to the dance tomorrow night?

Are you kidding me?

He wouldn't be caught dead

back in this place.

I mean, plus, he's on duty.

Aw.

So sad

how we miss that old Karl.

You know what?

Both of you guys

can kiss my butt, okay?

And what a cute butt it is.

Don't you think?

- See you.

- Bye.

Smoking kills, didn't you hear?

Ha!

Gee, and this coming from

the one that got me started.

You guys decide skip

hall decorations this year?

Whatever. It's

a stupid token "lame"- coming

for our senior year.

Wade asked for our help,

remember?

- In person?

- No.

At the pep rally for the class.

Exactly my point.

He put this entire thing

together, Nora.

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