Blue Jasmine Page #4

She's looking for a job.

EDDIE:
Yeah?

I know a dentist

who's looking for help.

Oh, yeah?

No, I'm actually thinking

of going back to school. Hm.

CHILI:
School?

Heh. To study what?

I don't know. I mean,

the biggest mistake I made

was leaving college in my last year

and not completing my education.

What would you be?

An anthropologist.

Really?

Like digging up old fossils?

That's an archaeologist.

Ginger told me the

whole story.

That must be terrible, right?

One minute you're on top

of the world, the next--

(IMITATES FART)

Guy turns out to be a crook. Heh, heh.

Yeah.

GINGER:
Her husband,

he owned racehorses.

EDDIE:
Is that so?

GINGER:
Yeah.

Oh, yes, yes,

for a year or two,

Hal became quite obsessed

with thoroughbreds.

So, what are you gonna

study in college?

EDDIE:

Let me guess.

A nurse. Huh?

Ooh.

Is that how

I impress you?

A nurse?

You got something against nurses?

My sister's a nurse.

Nurses are very hot to go to bed with.

They have extensive knowledge

of how the human body works.

Careful what you accuse my sister of.

CHILI:
Just saying, I know good nurses.

GINGER:
Chili, why don't

you change the subject?

You think you're being charming,

but you're not.

You always stare into space

like that?

I had a friend who used to do that,

but there was something wrong

with him. He was epileptic.

I'm not epileptic.

If you see the waitress,

I'd like another Stoli martini.

CHILI:
What are you gonna study?

GINGER:
Leave her alone.

It's like the third time you asked.

So? She hasn't answered.

I don't know, but I'll be sure

to keep you informed.

Oh, okay, sorry. I'll back off.

I'm sorry, I don't mean to be curt.

I just don't know what I'm gonna

do with the rest of my life.

What do you wanna do?

Why don't we take her to see the sights?

Then back to my place. She likes vodka.

My buddy's just back from Russia.

Brought me this incredible vodka.

Great idea.

You're gonna love my place.

Yeah, let's go.

(LOUIS ARMSTRONG'S

"AUNT HAGAR'S BLUES" PLAYING)

(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)

(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)

Wait till you try this vodka.

EDDIE:
All right, man.

I wish my apartment

had a garden.

We didn't take her inside Alcatraz.

Thank you.

They got tours in there, Jasmine.

Ginger said your ex-husband did time?

He'd still be doing time

if he didn't hang himself in his cell.

Really? Like with a belt?

Well, it had to be a belt. Or a bedsheet.

Could be a bedsheet.

JASMINE:
No.

He managed to get

a piece of rope.

Plain rope.

You can get anything

if you got juice.

That's some way to go, huh?

Strangle yourself to death?

No, it wasn't strangulation.

When you hang yourself,

your neck breaks.

I wouldn't feel sorry for him.

He hurt a lot of people.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, including me and Augie and her.

A lot of people are under

the misapprehension you strangle,

but your neck snaps.

Okay, we got it.

GINGER:

He was a bad guy, you know?

He lived like a big shot

on other people's money.

And he played around behind her back.

No.

Jasmine, go and start your cooldown.

JASMINE:
Oh, good.

(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)

Hey, Jas.

Yeah?

I know you don't wanna go

to the Yankee game tonight.

I'd go to any sporting event with you,

you know, but I just never got baseball.

I thought I'd ask Melanie. She's a fan.

Oh, sure. God, she'll be thrilled.

Hey, Mel?

Yeah?

You like baseball, right?

I love baseball. Why?

I got two season tickets behind

the Yankee dugout for tonight.

I don't have anybody else

to go with me. Are you free?

Absolutely, if you're sure

there's nobody else.

No.

No, no, you'll do just fine.

All right, thanks.

This is where you live? Nice.

Yeah.

CHILI:
Hey, grab the groceries for me.

Yeah.

GINGER:
I can get this one.

Get them.

You got it? All right.

I got it.

Oh! Oh.

Oh, no.

That's okay, don't worry.

EDDIE:
No more vodka for you.

GINGER:
I didn't have any vodka.

I didn't have no vodka.

EDDIE:
I know about you.

Hey, hey, come here,

come here, come here.

Take it upstairs?

Yes?

GINGER:
Yeah.

All right.

Eddie wants your

phone number.

Why?

I think he wants to call you.

I think he wants to ask you out,

you know, for dinner.

Look, I'm busy at the moment.

He's a terrific guy. Look at him.

Well, why doesn't he

ask me himself?

Because he's shy, you know?

He thinks he's short.

Look, I'm concentrating

on school, okay?

And getting a job.

That's perfect.

Right, he knows this dentist.

No, I have no interest

in being a receptionist.

What did you have in mind,

running a bank?

Is this what you wanted to talk about?

And how long you're planning

on staying with Ginger.

Oh, right. It's just till I find my feet.

We have a lot of big plans.

Don't worry, I'm not gonna ruin

any of your big plans.

No one wants to get out of here

as fast as I do.

I'm sure this is a big comedown

from what you're used to.

It's fine. it's--

I'm grateful for her help.

So you don't want Eddie

to call you?

No, I'm not ready to go out

at the moment.

Ginger said

you had a nervous breakdown.

She tends to be

quite dramatic.

Said you were in the street,

talking to yourself.

You know, I don't think

that this is any of your business.

No, but since I'm marrying her,

we don't have any secrets between us.

Ugh.

What did Chili want?

JASMINE:
Oh, nothing.

His retarded boyfriend wanted a date,

but he was too shy to ask.

What do you think of Chili?

He's very anxious to move in with you.

Yeah, I know.

He's got the hots for me.

Can I speak frankly?

You hate him?

Yeah.

I could tell you two

didn't hit it off.

He's another version

of Augie. He's a loser.

Hey, didn't I hear Eddie say

he knows a dentist looking for help?

Oh, forget it!

Jesus, it's too menial!

I'd go nuts.

I wanna go back to school.

I wanna get my degree and become,

you know, something substantial.

I can't just do some mindless job.

Ugh. I was forced to take a job

selling shoes on Madison Avenue.

Oh, so humiliating.

Friends I'd had at dinner parties

at our apartment came in

and I waited on them. I mean,

do you have any idea what that's like?

You know, one minute,

you're hosting women

and the next, you're measuring

their shoe size and fitting them.

Erica Bishop came into the store.

She saw me

and was so embarrassed for me,

she slipped out

thinking I didn't see her.

I saw you, Erica!

Are you okay?

Hey, you got great taste.

Maybe you could do something

in fashion.

Or designing. Yeah?

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah.

Everyone used to say

I'd make a good interior decorator.

There's courses,

but, you know, they cost money.

No, Eve Logan got

her decorator's license online.

On a computer?

I guess you could, but--

Yeah, I'm so computer illiterate.

But I could take a class

in computers.

And then when I can handle a computer,

then I can study decorating online.

That sounds too complicated.

Why is your reaction always negative?

I'm just saying.

You know, first you gotta

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