Boiler Room Page #5

in one of our stocks.

Your wife's on three.

I will call her back.

Yes. M.S.C. Sounds like

it might be interesting.

Might be?

"Might be" doesn't sell stock at the

rate M.S.C.'s going for it, Dr. Jacobs.

- We're talking very high volume.

- I still have to run it by my people.

That's great, Doc, if you wanna miss

yet another opportunity here...

and watch your colleagues

get rich doing clinical trials.

- Don't buy a share and hang up.

- Hold on a second.

- I just want to talk about it more.

- Honestly, I don't have the time.

This stock is blowing up right now.

The whole firm's going nuts.

Hold on. Let me open up

the door to my office.

Oh, my God!

See that, Doc?

That's my trading floor.

I have calls to make to a million other

doctors who are already in the know.

I can't walk you through this right now.

I'm sorry.

Okay, okay.

Let's do this.

Since you're a new account, I can't go

higher than 2,000 shares. I'm sorry.

beyond what I was thinking. 2,000?

Jesus!

Listen. I'm curious. Why can't you

sell me any more than that?

Well, we like to establish a

relationship with our clients...

on something small before we get

to the more serious trades.

Let me show you several

percentage points on this small trade...

and then we'll talk

about doing future business.

That sounds good.

Give me the 2,000 shares.

- Done.

- You sure you can't do better on this?

- I'm sorry, Dr. Jacobs. I can't.

- All right.

- We'll start with this trade, then.

- Great. I promise...

we'll swing for the fences

on the next one.

Do you want that confirmation

sent to your office or your mansion?

Very funny,

Mr. Marlin.

Let me put my secretary on,

and she'll take down your info.

It was a pleasure

doing business with you.

Done and done.

Yeah, baby!

- So, why'd you put a max on his buy?

- What?

Why'd you put a max on his buy?

You didn't tell him

how it works?

He's a trainee. He doesn't need

to know initial sell limits.

Make sure he shows you the ropes, kid.

He's too busy callin' his bookie.

F***in' Hebrews. Always lookin' out

for themselves and never the trainees.

- Hey, hey.

- Why don't you go back to Little Italy?

Go make me a latke, dreidel boy.

Abrams, look me up on the board.

The reason I capped him

is in case he's a piker.

See, we're gonna front the money

for this sale...

and if he doesn't send the check,

I'm the one holding the bag, follow me?

Right.

Last commission month, the kid on Jim's

team wrote a million-dollar ticket.

Stock was down 31/2 points

by settlement.

F***in' kid took

a 1/4 million-dollar hit.

- Sh*t.

- You know how much that hurts?

Besides, the first sell

just whets the appetite.

If he's a whale...

which it looks like he is...

then I'll get him on a day

when there's a real rip.

What's a rip?

A commission.

That's why we work here.

We make huge rips.

No, I don't... I still

don't know how it works.

Okay.

A two-dollar rip, which is unheard of

anywhere on Wall Street...

means that we're walkin' away...

with two dollars

for every share we sell.

Real money.

That's opportunity.

Jesus, Greg, you show him

where the bathroom is yet?

Yeah, Seth, I showed you

where Chris's desk is, right?

- Richie, do something with this...

- How does Michael afford that?

- Couldn't tell you.

- Okay.

If he's doin' it, he's makin' money

on it. Point is:

Service your client right,

and he'll be back for more.

Show him a three-percent return...

and he'll trust you to

watch his kids for the weekend.

- Abby.

- Hey, Seth.

- Hi.

- You wanna go get yourself a drink?

Yeah.

You want anything?

Oh. Okay.

I thought this was supposed to

be a big broker hangout.

Merrill Lynch. Salomon Brothers.

Mad, big-dick Steve. What is this place?

This looks like the f***ing

Christmas party at Mutual of Omaha.

Yo, check this out.

Joe.

Oh, my God. Would you

look at these monkeys?

So, who do you live with?

You mean, is the little black girl here

takin' care of her grandma...

'cause her mama's

a crackhead?

Yeah, exactly. I thought

it was smack, though.

Right.

Boy, you gotta get ahold

of that edge. It's kinda sharp.

I know. It's just that

I get so much sh*t at J. T...

that sometimes I have

to get in that mode just to...

fend them off of me, you know?

Yeah, I was gonna ask you

why are you there...

because it doesn't seem like the ideal

working environment for a black woman.

No, it isn't. It's just that...

how many secretaries do you know

that make 80 grand a year?

- One.

- Exactly.

- "No, no, no. I gotta call the boss."

- Look at this guy. Check it.

No way.

Vito Corleone.

You don't come all my life...

and then you show up

at my daughter's confirmation.

"Are you standin' up or sittin' down?"

By that time l...

- How you doin'?

- What's up?

- You guys lookin' for a broker?

- Who the f*** are you?

- Easy.

- I'm not doin' anything.

I thought maybe you were lookin'

for somebody to invest with.

- No. Yeah, we're fine. We are brokers.

- You are?

- Yeah.

- You guys with Jacoby & Jacoby?

- J.T. Marlin.

- Never heard of it.

Hold on a second. Who are you?

What do you sell? Car insurance?

We're with this little firm downtown.

Maybe you've heard of us.J.P. Morgan?

- And I'm a black Negro.

- Right.

I know J.T. It's a f***in' chop shop.

They named it so it sounds like ours.

He knows that firm.

It's a f***in' chop shop.

They named the firm to sound

like his. What is he, f***ing Yogi Biz?

- Shut the f*** up.

- We're not buying it.

And what the f*** is with the suits?

You look like you're on Gotti's crew.

- You look great. Seriously.

- Do you know who you're talkin' to?

- Who are we talkin' to?

- You don't know?

Here's Vito and John Jr.

I don't wanna get involved in this.

We're not bothering you.

We're not.

Patrick, call out the police. Come on!

It's my dad

that's the mess...

but that's not

really interesting conversation.

What about you?

Single mother. No money.

And now I take care of her.

- What's wrong?

- She's got chronic pneumonia.

You know, she smoked for, like,

And it's...

She's just really happy that I have

this job so I can support both of us.

- But it's scary sometimes, you know?

- Yeah.

What about your father?

I don't wanna talk

about my father either.

Ready?

- Tell me a story.

- What do you wanna hear?

I don't know. Tell me...

Tell me a story about your dad.

Well, I have

so many great ones.

Go on. Tell me.

All right.

Well, I'm ten years old...

and I just

got this new bike.

It's a silver Mongoose,

you know, like BMX.

And I'm skidding out in this puddle

like Starsky and Hutch.

- Right.

- And my foot slips...

and the pedal spins around

hard enough to break my leg.

- Oh, my God.

- But I don't fall off the bike.

- I keep going down this hill.

- And I get really scared, you know?

So I jumped off the bike...

and I landed

behind this parked car.

And I was laying there

for a good half hour.

And finally...

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