Breaking Up Page #6

- Finally moved.

Michael got to me.

We're downtown with the boys.

- Well, that's excellent.

- Thank you.

- Why are you in Santa Barbara?

- A film, Artichoke.

We're very near Castroville here.

- I don't do much still stuff anymore.

- That's terrific.

We do, like...

...educational, documentary stuff.

But I actually did take

some stills recently.

They're very nice.

Would you like to see them?

Yeah, I'd love to see them.

Organically grown.

Your Honor.

- Oh, my God.

- Yep. That's what I said.

Look at him.

- Is it a him?

- No, it's a girl.

- She's just a baby.

- Six months.

- You didn't tell me.

- No, I...

- You didn't tell me either.

- She's beautiful.

- Yeah, you think so?

- I can't believe you did this.

Not hard. I had years of practice.

Some with you.

No, it is hard.

But it's funny.

Because after you do it, you wonder:

"Why did you wait so long?"

That's enough.

It's disgusting anyway.

I don't show them to anybody anymore.

They smile, but they hate it.

Is she good to you?

- The baby?

- The wife.

- Oh, yeah.

- Dumb question.

Not at all.

I know what you mean. But she is, yes.

I used to do that.

I used to ask people

if they were happy or stuff like that.

I don't do it anymore. It's stupid,

and it's none of my business.

Are you happy?

Yeah, I am. I am happy.

That's great.

I worry a lot. I think maybe

I should have been smarter.

I think I did it all wrong.

I should have...

I don't know if I can give them

what they need. You know?

Sometimes I think...

...I don't even know if I know what

they need. That's okay, really...

...because I enjoy trying.

Sometimes I think it's working.

Sometimes not.

- Sometimes it's best not to think.

- Right. Just do it.

Funny, isn't it? You know?

I feel more alone now.

That surprised me.

That really did.

There's so much more going on.

People and work and the baby,

and it's all good.

But I still feel more alone.

Well, it doesn't get any easier.

Listen...

...it's getting late.

Yeah, I better get moving.

Yeah, I got an early flight.

- You're leaving tomorrow?

- Yeah.

Well, it was good to see you.

It was good to see you too.

I'm gonna have the worst hangover.

I better go, huh?

Yeah.

So do you have any good or bad

breakup stories you can tell?

The lowest...

... would have been the guy

right before him...

... who asked me to marry him

and then went away...

... and wanted me to visit him.

I called him to firm up the details,

and a woman answered the phone.

And this was at midnight,

and she tried to wake him up.

He was in a drunken stupor

and could not be awakened.

He called the next day and said,

"Honey, I'm sorry. "

I said, "You asked me to marry you.

What were you doing with a woman

after proposing to me?"

And he said,

"Darling, we're not married yet. "

The worst breakup I ever had

took two years.

I moved across the country,

3000 miles away.

He followed me, and when he left,

we were back together.

But by the time he made it to New York,

we had somehow broken up again.

He got a girl pregnant.

I'm always...

Spread my wings and fly.

Does it every time. And even then,

he still wanted to go out with me.

He was gonna marry her, but he said

we'd still stay the same...

... meaning we'd still be together

because at this point, we were together.

My girlfriend and I

used to e-mail each other.

It was a romantic thing we did

when we went to different schools.

One night I got home,

and she broke up with me over e-mail.

And the reason that she gave me

was that she had met someone else...

... over e-mail.

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