Brigsby Bear Page #5

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Fire away!

That's good. Now, foot off the brake.

Just drive,

and we'll just get out of here.

- I'm doing it!

- Hey, no, look forward.

- I'm driving a car!

- He's driving a car!

And remember, always sweep your corridors,

and if you're feeling romantic emotions,

only touch your penis twice a day.

Okay. Is that everything?

Yep. This is everything I need

for my new garden.

Hey, excuse me.

- Are you the bear guy?

- Mmm-hmm.

Holy sh*t!

Oh, my god!

I saw you, and you got the shirt on...

Oh, it's Brigsby's art grid.

That's right. The art grid.

Wow. My friends and I

love those videos, man.

They're incredible.

I know you didn't make them but

they were made for you by your freak dad.

That's so messed up.

Can I get a photo with you?

- Do you mind?

- No. I could do a photo.

- Hi, can you take a photo of us?

- Mmm? Oh, me? Yeah.

- Is this your real mom?

- Yeah.

Wow.

Okay, there. Pretty good.

Got the thumbs up there.

Thanks. Uh...

Well, uh, peace, man.

Yeah. Peace, man.

Kidnap kid.

I guess the key thing

to think about here

is that feldo mortese

is a powerful bandith warrior.

But he's sad, right?

Yes, exactly. He's sad.

That's the whole reason

why he lives in the cave.

Makes sense. Give it a shot?

Let's do it!

Your parents aren't coming home

any time soon, right?

Yeah. One's doing golf

and the other one's at the stores.

Just try to focus on your tragic past now

if you can.

Sure.

And action.

Our kind rose up against the one

you call sun snatcher.

But we lost.

Those who survived, fled.

Leaving only me, cowering

in the dark corner of a forgotten world.

You, Brigsby bear,

are the chosen one.

You are our last hope.

Our keeper of the light!

- Cut.

- Wow.

- Perfect.

- Yeah.

Thank you, detective Vogel.

That was amazing.

We're moving on...

No, can I try another one?

I... I think, um, maybe I could

bring it to another level.

Really, another one?

I don't know... I could try something.

Okay, just don't break

any sacred codes of bandith culture.

Okay. I don't know what those are.

It's a distinct set of laws

that the bandith follow.

It's kind of their way of life.

We're rolling.

I'm not ready.

Okay. Take your time.

Your magical powers are getting

stronger by the day, smile sisters!

Soon we will be strong enough

to kill sun snatcher.

That's right. But first we have to make

our physical body strong.

Ready, everyone?

And one, and lunge,

and two, and remember,

when you sweat, that's just your body

flushing poison from your brain.

And hop.

Not bad. Good aim.

Here wait. I've got an idea.

We can make it a lot easier.

Ha! Like that.

And we can do slam dunks. Alley-oop!

- Hmm?

- I'm open. Here. Throw me the ball.

Okay, darn it. I'm okay.

Here. Your turn.

Actually, I'm pretty busy

with my movie today.

Hey, you can take a break, right?

I mean, you've been working real hard.

It might be fun to just hang out,

you and me.

No, thanks. Thank you, though.

- I'm pretty sure I've been there.

- What, the ocean?

- A nondescript body of water.

- Oh, no.

I might be making that up.

- Hello, merideth.

- Hey, what's up, man?

Not much, man.

- So, what are you guys doing?

- Good question.

We're actually going to go filming but

then we're going to go hiking and camping.

We're going to a real mountain.

You guys should come.

- I don't know.

- Come on. It'll be fun.

You could, you know, be staff master.

This is kind of cool.

I got drinks. Logan is bringing weed.

It's going to be so much fun.

And it's also going to be dope as sh*t.

Okay, one, two, three.

Spencer, let's do the transporter thing

right here.

Brigsby's just come back

from the beaches of lnra.

Lands there. We spin into it.

We'll hear the transponder...

Yeah, so I'll take two shots?

Two static.

One with you in and one without?

So, I'm gonna spin into it.

Give me an "action."

Spencei all right.

Action!

James. Oh, my god.

- What's the issue?

- Brigsby's eye is gone.

- Oh, no!

- You're blind right now, dude.

He can't even see right now!

How is he supposed to

travel inter-dimensionally

if he can't even see where he's going?

Um, I got it. I got it.

Come over here. Let me fix this.

Get him on... ta-da!

- There you go.

- Perfect.

- Now he can see.

- Exactly.

Now he can transport inter-dimensionally

- from the beaches of lnra.

- Exactly.

- Good job, man.

- Good job, man.

- Thanks.

- All right, thanks. All right, let's go.

These flowers are everywhere.

They're so pretty.

Hey, guys, it's right over here. Let's go.

- Come on, dude.

- I'm coming.

Hey, merideth. Can we talk for a second?

Sure, what's up?

- Maybe we can go for a walk.

- Oh, okay.

First of all,

I think that you're so great.

Thanks, man.

- I think you're chill, too.

- Thanks.

And, um, lthought

the party was really fun.

- Yeah, you were wasted.

- Yeah.

Um...

Listen, this is kind of hard for me

because I know that we both really liked

touching each other's bodies

- and doing sex type stuff.

- Mmm-hmm.

But, um...

I don't think I can marry you.

Yeah, for sure.

Wait. So, you're okay with that?

Yeah, of course.

I'm never getting married.

My parents are so messed up and sad.

Really? That's great.

I was so nervous. Thank you.

I was like, "am I going to

have to get married to her?"

But I'm still also totally into doing

that other stuff we did, too.

- Yeah, not a chance.

- Okay.

- Hey, James.

- Hey.

Hey, you wanna try that?

Was it this song?

I don't think so, but I do... I like this.

- Okay.

- That sounds good to me.

What about this one?

Yes! That's it right there.

Dude, I'm obsessed with this song.

I'll make you a playlist.

What? I've always wanted that,

and I'm going to get one?

- Yeah, dude.

- That's awesome.

- For sure.

- For sure.

They probably didn't let you

listen to much music, huh?

No, no, I did.

But it was mostly just stuff

by the beatlers.

Because my old dad was in band.

Did you just say "beatlers"?

Yeah, the beatlers.

Actually, I think I've got

one of their tapes.

Oh...

Let me... can I borrow that, Logan?

- Sure, man.

- I think you're gonna like this.

No!

They suck.

This is definitely

the worst song I've ever heard.

Mmm.

I kind of love it.

Right?

It's too bad you weren't abducted.

I bet we would have had fun together.

Yeah, I guess.

I'm sorry that I've...

I've been kind of whatever to you.

It's okay.

I'm glad you came out.

Yeah, me, too.

- Give me one of these right here.

- Oh. Yeah.

Aw!

Shut up.

No, but for real,

it's about to get dark enough.

We should go head out

set up the next shot.

Yes! Let's do it!

It is time.

- And he's coming with me.

- Bye, guys.

- Have fun.

- Bye, merideth.

- Check this out.

- All right.

- No!

- Mmm-hmm.

- No sh*t.

- Yeah.

- You made this?

- I did.

Mainframe right here. Quadrium processor.

Dude, it's going to look so frickin' good.

It's going to look so frickin' good.

Make sure to get out of the way

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