Calvaire Page #2

I was kidding,

I was always

the first one to crack a joke...

Listen.

A dwarves association...

...decides to create a football club.

So...

They play games every Sunday.

and... they meet in a bar,

on the first floor, in a private room.

One sunday, there's this guy,

standing at the bar,

he's quite messed up already,

and then he sees 2 dwarves,

dressed in blue,

coming down the stairs.

then 3, then 4, 5, 6, 10, 11 !

He thinks he's having hallucinations,

then, he pours himself...

he orders another whisky,

then he sees dwarves again,

dressed in red,

coming down the stairs,

He orders another whisky,

and calls the bartender,

and he says...

I don't want to worry you,

but I think your Foosball's running away !

Your Foosball's running away !

That's a good one, isn't it ?

And I'm not telling it right !

Back in the days,

People were rolling on the floor laughing.

You know why ?

Enthusiasm Marc.

Enthusiasm I tell you.

Enthusiasm is the key to success.

When Gloria left,

I decided to fill my head with work,

I decided to write an essay,

"Notions...

...of enthusiasm in the principles of humor. "

It was the title.

I never finished it.

I never finished it,

'cause when a woman leaves you...

You become a mess.

It was very good.

But I got a long road tomorrow.

I need to sleep.

Already ?

You're gonna leave without...

...singing me a song ?

I beg your pardon ?

You got to sing me a song...

show me your talent.

I don't know,

it's late and I'm tired.

Come on, don't make me beg you.

We're both artists.

I did told you a story.

Ok, but I don't know what to sing,

I got no music...

Improvise.

A love song.

Love songs are always great.

I told you:
enthusiasm is the key.

Like a rose of May,

Youth and beauty were given to you,

Me, in the dark, staring at my life,

I see too many looks shining with envy,

You're too beautiful and too sensual,

for a guy like me.

I've the simple dream, of a peaceful happiness,

you couldn't give me.

Here you are.

You mean that's all ?

I didn't tell you half a story.

You have to finish that song.

You're too beautiful and flirting

wouldn't be enough for me.

I'd like to offer you my bed,

but for all my life.

Even the dove,

happy in its nest,

sometimes flies away,

for ever to infinity.

I'm afraid,

but am I right or wrong,

that some day you fly away,

making for new horizons.

You're too beautiful and too sensual,

for a guy like me.

I've the simple dream, of a peaceful happiness,

you couldn't give me.

You're too beautiful and flirting

wouldn't be enough for me.

I'd like to offer you my bed,

but for all my life.

This time it's over.

I'm going to bed.

Don't forget to wake me up tomorrow.

- Marc.

- Yes ?

Thanks for this wonderful moment.

Bartel ?

Anybody here ?

Bella !

Boris.

I'm looking for Bartel.

- You hear me ?

- Leave me alone.

Please answer me.

You saw him ?

- I'll never find her again.

- Who ?

Bella, my dog.

I'm sorry about your dog

but did you see Bartel ?

She's alone in the woods.

In the cold.

Bella...Bella...

Boris do you hear me ?

I'm looking for Bartel.

Lost.

- Boris.

- She must be so afraid...

Can I help you ?

I was looking for you.

The door was open, I thought...

I was ordering a new battery

for your van.

The mechanic should be here soon.

Just wait a little more.

You didn't wake me up and

I got a problem with my van.

You were sleeping so well

I didn't want to woke you up...

You found it?

You left it yesterday night...

I was about to give it back to you.

What are you doing ?

You're crazy !

Stop !

Calm down Bartel,

I don't wanna hurt you.

That's what you're looking for ?

That's what you're looking for !

Why do you leave now you're back,

you wanna step on my heart again ?

What are you doing ?

Bartel...I won't tell anybody

Let me go...

You see. It's easier

when you don't move your head.

I'm doing this to protect you.

I don't like making you ugly.

I'm suffering as much as you do.

I'm happy too.

It's gonna be the greatest Christmas

that ever took place here.

Where is my axe ?

You know, the one with an oak handle...

You should know that.

You never put things at the same place.

Here it is !

We're gonna find the best Christmas tree,

and you'll decorate it.

You always loved to hang balls up,

stars, garlands,

that's you thing, isn't it ?

You try to leave me again,

I cut you in two like a log !

Let's go.

You got a ticket to ride ?

You hear ?

Bartel's laugh !

My enthusiasm is back,

thanks to you !

Let's go.

Hey ho, let's go !

You see that,

like a young man.

B*tch !

What a f***ing b*tch !

What a f***ing damn b*tch !

Gloria...Gloria...

Gloria !

Gloria for Christ sake !

Anybody here ?

Boris.

Daddy promise to Bella he'll find her.

Bella won't stay alone in the woods.

- Untie me.

Untie me.

Boris...come back...

come back, untie me Boris...

Here you are Mr Bartel.

Cheer up Boris,

You'll find your dog.

But you got to insist.

Obstinacy pays.

Obstinacy's the key.

So, you're coming with us ?

No thanks. I'm gonna do like you said.

I'm gonna insist.

You're damn right to insist !

I gotta go.

You see what you make me do.

What's in your head ?

I don't like it either,

but you don't want to understand.

You, don't forget I know.

I forgive you,

but I know what's going on.

A beer.

Two beers.

A beer I said.

I'm here to warn you.

I'm gonna be happy.

Starting now.

All I want is to live in peace.

You understand ?

- I'll kill anyone looking at my wife.

- Your wife ?

Why do you think she's your wife ?

Probably his sense of humor.

Don't come around my house anymore.

You hear me ?

Stick your threats up your ass.

She's my wife.

My wife.

You've been warned.

What do you want ?

Good.

Good to eat Bartel's soup again,

isn't it?

Eat slowly.

We're gonna live just like before,

aren't we ?

Aren't we ?

Watch out, it's pouring everywhere.

I thinked about it you know.

We're gonna reopen the inn.

You'll sing of course,

I'll do the support act.

I don't want to worry you,

but I think your Foosball's running away.

I found Bella.

That's great Boris.

I did like you said Mr Bartel.

I insisted,

and I found Bella.

I insisted and I found Bella.

So let's drink.

Let's drink to Christmas miracles

gathering the lovers.

I insisted...

and I found Bella.

- How does she look ?

- She looks good. That's great.

I think you're great too.

- Are you all right Mr Bartel ?

- I'm all right.

Bella came back home,

Gloria came back home.

We're all together for Christmas.

I love you, you're my family.

You hear that ?

We're family !

Don't move.

Help me...

Help me...

Rescue me.

I got it dad, let's go.

What's going on ?

Shut up b*tch.

Come on, sing.

Sing I said.

Come on, sing.

Better than this.

Come on.

- Yeah come on.

- Come on, come on, come on...

Shut the f*** up !

Why did you come back Gloria ?

I loved you.

I'm not Gloria.

I'm Marc Stevens.

A singer.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes