Cardboard Boxer Page #2

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Anybody... ask any one of these...

pick any one of these sorry motherfuckers,

any one of them...

and I'll beat their ass.

Yeah, how much?

What do you mean "how much"?

How much... how much to see you

fight somebody right now?

Right now? Sh*t. How much you got?

I got $50.

Get the f*** out of here,

get off of my row.

There's no fight. $50 ain't sh*t.

Sure, it is. Hey, who wants 50 bucks, huh?

Raise your hand if you want 50 bucks.

Hmm?

Anybody?

Hey, buddy.

You wanna make some money? Huh?

What do you say?

Come on. You go... you wanna make a 50?

Dead motherf***er!

Oh sh*t!

Yo, yo, dude, we're on!

We're on! F***ing film this, man!

Whoa! F***ing film!

Come on!

Jesus!

Dead motherf***er. Get up.

No, man, don't let

anybody do that sh*t to you.

- Yo, what's his name?

- Come on, man!

Yeah, man!

Hey! Come on, Willie!

You've got to get back up.

Yeah!

- Yeah.

- Yeah. Hit him in the face.

Kill him now!

Dude, he's messing him up pretty bad.

Maybe we should just call it, huh?

F***ing film.

Get up!

Come on, Willie!

Come on, Willie! Come on, boy!

Yeah.

Hey! Hey, that's enough!

That's enough! He's had enough.

Whoo! Willie, you f***ing won! Ha!

Dude, I thought you were dead

for sure, motherf***er! Oh my...

You f***ing won, Willie!

Yo, pay him motherf***er.

Yeah, yeah. No problem.

None whatsoever.

Willie!

Ladies and gentlemen,

please put your hands together for Willie.

My main man, Willie the Cardboard Boxer!

Whoo! You get that?

Go, Willie!

Hey, man. You need some help?

- What?

- Here, let me push you.

Get the f*** off of me, man!

I got it.

Hey, do you know how to read cursive?

What?

Do you know how to read cursive?

Yeah, I know how

to read cursive, motherf***er.

Then if you read this,

I will push you up the hill.

You wanna read this?

I ain't readin' you sh*t!

- Hey! Don't do that!

- Get the f*** off of me!

You know where the pawn shop is?

Aha, you thought I was lying, right?

Whoa! Is that really him?

Yeah, it's President

of the United States, bro!

And me, you see that?

You believe that?

I'll show you something.

What! Purple Heart.

Wow!

You know what the President

said when he gave that to me?

He said, "I thank you on the behalf

"of the American people.

I thank you for your service.

You're a real life hero, Pinky."

"Pinky"?

Yeah, that's my nickname, son.

I told him. I was like,

"You call me anything, you call me Pinky."

Sh*t. Can you believe that, though?

You're pushing an honest-to-God

war hero, motherf***er.

Iraqi War hero.

Why did they call you "Pinky"?

Because I used to wear a f***ing

dope-ass pinky ring.

But I pawned that sh*t

just like I wanna pawn this sh*t.

Yo, take me in.

Are you out of your f***ing mind, sir?

That's a Purple Heart right there.

You ain't from America, though, are you?

Where you from, my man?

Pakistan.

Pakistan? F***ing figures. God!

They only give them to war heroes.

That's a Purple Heart, right there.

Understand it? To... to heroes!

I know what it is. I'll...

I'll give you $15.

My man you said 50 or 15?

Because I know you said 50. Come on.

- 15.

- 15?

Very few want to buy this.

It's... it's worthless.

It's f***ing not worthless, man.

It's my legs right there.

You... you want to...

you want to sell this to me or not?

F*** you, man.

Keep your money, bro.

I don't need your money.

Let's go, Willie.

Let's go. Let's go.

Yo, yo. Let me tell you something, my man.

This is me and the President

of the United States!

A country you living in right now.

Let me ask you something.

Who f***ing knows you, bro?

Nobody f***ing knows you.

Who knows you? Answer me.

No, nobody f***ing knows you.

F*** you.

Let's go, Willie. Nobody knows this guy.

You're lucky I don't come back here, bro.

This chicken looks okay.

It's not bad.

- It's got ants on it.

- I know there's f***ing ants on that sh*t.

That's an ant.

God! You've been over there?

No.

Too shy.

How much is it?

$5 for a blow-job.

$10 for a p*ssy.

They're really nice.

Yeah, I bet.

I suppose you gotta be

in the band to get the girl.

- You ever play in a band?

- Sh*t yeah, man!

Played piano.

Opened for the Dramatics when I was 15.

You ever heard of them?

No. You any good, though?

On piano? I was good enough.

Wasn't no Mozart and them.

But, sh*t, you know,

it was just for fun, brother.

Just fun, huh.

Backstage this older girl...

she took me to the bathroom.

Girls' bathroom. I got to finger her.

Ah!

Yeah, man.

See, that's what you've got

to grasp on to, little brother.

You gotta filter through the memories.

Pick the best one and hold that sh*t tight.

Let the rest of them fade away.

What about you, Eavesdrop?

What you want to do, man?

- What?

- You had any dreams when you was a kid?

Yeah, I used to dream at night.

Nah, I mean, if you could have anything

in the world that you want,

what would you want?

I don't want to be alone when I die.

Sh*t. You got plenty of company

down here, man.

You couldn't be alone if you tried.

Believe me, I've tried.

Dear diary...

I'm so lonely.

Other kids used to stare...

but now no one looks at me.

Uncle Craig hates me.

I keep waiting for the angel

Mommy sent to hug me,

but...

there's no one there.

Hey.

Sometimes I wonder

if Mommy can even hear me.

Maybe she's not there either anymore.

Maybe you have someone

in your life for just a little while.

And when they go, they're gone.

And you're all alone.

I know how it feels to be lonely.

There have been long times

when I didn't talk to anyone at all.

Sometimes people stare at me...

and I don't like it.

But other times,

I wish someone would see me...

just to know I am here.

But, you started talking to me...

and then I started talking to other people.

And now, I do have friends.

You and Pinky.

And if I can make friends...

then you will make friends, too.

So, don't worry.

I hear you.

And your mommy... she can hear you, too.

I know you exist.

P.S. There's going to be thunder, tonight.

Don't be afraid, though,

'cause I'll be with you the whole time.

Your friend, Willie.

Happy new year, everybody!

Happy new year!

Yo! Easy.

You know, I wouldn't smoke in the war.

Mmm-mmm.

Oh, that's real.

Everybody in my unit,

they took up smoking,

because they weren't thinking long term.

They was all like, "Sh*t,

I'll be lucky to die of lung cancer."

I'd be like, "Yeah, whatever. You 50

"and dyin', and your wife

and your friends are still chillin'

"with mad time ahead of 'em,

you gon' feel stupid."

"Yo, yo, Pinky,

you could die tomorrow or your ass

could get blown up by a mortar right now."

"Yeah, but, If I don't,

I want to live to be an old-ass man."

Now thinking about being

an old-ass man out here...

I'd be lucky to die of lung cancer.

Sh*t.

F***ing went out

'cause I was f***ing talking.

What do you want your sign to say?

"Give me you f***ing money.

I ain't got no legs."

No. You shouldn't use bad words.

You should say "Veteran."

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