Cars Page #3

blow a gasket or somethin'.

Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine!

What in the blue blazes?

Crazy hot-rodder.

[Siren continues wailing]

[Hank Williams:

My Heart Would Know]

[Buzzing]

[Water hose turning on]

[Snoring]

I'm telling you, man,

every third blink is slower.

The sixties weren't good to you,

were they?

[Car backfires]

[Sirens blasting]

What? That's not the Interstate!

- [Sheriff backfires]

- Ah! Oh!

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

- [Screaming]

- [Tires screeching]

No, no, no, no, no, no!

Ow!

I'm not the only one seeing this, right?

- Incoming!

- Whoa, man.

- No!

- Hey!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

My tires!

- [Grunting]

- [Gasping]

- [Screaming]

- [Gasping]

- [Tires squealing]

- [Cables vibrating]

[Yelling]

[Shouting]

[Screaming]

- [Cables whizzing]

- [Straining]

Fly away, Stanley. Be free!

[Gasping]

[Breathing heavily]

Boy, you're in a heap of trouble.

[Sighing]

We're live at the Los Angeles

International Speedway

as the first competitor,

Lightning McQueen,

is arriving at the track.

Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl?

What's your strategy?

- [Crowd gasps]

- [Cameras clicking]

What? Did I forget

to wipe my mud flaps?

McQueen's driver arrived in California,

but McQueen was missing.

- McQueen was reported missing.

...to race an unprecedented...

[male] Sponsor stated

they have no idea where he is.

I hope Lightning's OK. I'd hate

to see anything bad happen to him.

I don't know what's harder to find,

McQueen or a chief who'll work with him!

[German accent] Lightning McQueen

must be found at all costs!

They're all asking the same question:

Where is McQueen?

[Groaning] Oh, boy.

Where am I?

- Mornin', sleepin' beauty!

- Ah!

Boy, I was wonderin'

when you was gonna wake up.

Take whatever you want!

Just don't hurt me!

A parking boot?

Why do I have a parking boot on?

- What's going on here? Please!

- [Chuckling] You're funny.

I like you already. My name's Mater.

Mater?

Yeah, like "tuh-mater,"

but without the "tuh".

- What's your name?

- You don't know my name?

Uh...

No, I know your name.

Is your name Mater too?

What?

Look, I need to get to California

as fast as possible. Where am I?

Where are you? Shoot!

You're in Radiator Springs.

The cutest little town

in Carburetor County.

Oh, great. Just great!

Well, if you think that's great,

you should see the rest of the town.

You know,

I'd love to see the rest of the town!

So if you could just open the gate,

take this boot off,

you and me, we go cruisin',

check out the local scene...

- Dad-gum!

- How'd that be, Tuhmater?

- Cool!

- Mater!

What did I tell you

about talkin' to the accused?

To not to.

Well, quit your yappin' and tow this

delinquent road hazard to traffic court.

Well, we'll talk later, Mater.

[Chuckling] "Later, Mater."

That's funny!

Ah!

[Sheriff] The Radiator Springs

Traffic Court will come to order!

Hey, you scratched my paint!

I oughta take a blowtorch to you, man!

You broke-a the road!

You a very bad car!

- Fascist!

- Commie!

Officer, talk to me, babe.

How long is this gonna take?

I gotta get to California, pronto.

Where's your lawyer?

I don't know. Tahiti maybe.

He's got a timeshare there.

When a defendant has no lawyer,

the court will assign one to him. Hey!

Anyone want to be his lawyer?

Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff!

All rise! The Honorable

Doc Hudson presiding.

Show-off.

- May Doc have mercy on your soul.

- [Door banging]

- [Gasping]

- All right,

I wanna know who's responsible

for wreckin' my town, Sheriff.

I want his hood on a platter!

I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots!

No, check that.

I'm gonna put him in jail till

the jail rots on top of him,

and then I'm gonna move him

to a new jail and let that jail rot.

I'm...

Throw him out of here, Sheriff.

I want him out of my courtroom.

I want him out of our town!

- Case dismissed.

- Yes!

Boy, I'm purty good

at this lawyerin' stuff.

Sorry I'm late, Your Honor!

Holy Porsche! She's gotta be

from my attorney's office.

Hey, thanks for comin',

but we're all set.

- He's letting me go.

- He's letting you go?

Yeah, your job's pretty easy today.

All you have to do now is stand there

and let me look at you.

Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase.

Me, you, dinner. Pi-cha-kow!

- What the...? Ow! Oh!

- Ka-chow!

- Please!

- I know. I get that reaction a lot.

I create feelings in others that

they themselves don't understand.

- [Rewing]

- Agh! Ow!

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you?

A little bit, but I'll be all right.

OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge.

Do what you gotta do, baby.

But listen. Be careful.

Folks around here are not firing on

all cylinders, if you know what I mean.

Ka-ching!

Ah!

I'll keep that in mind.

- Hey there, Mater.

- Howdy, Sally.

- Hi, folks!

- Good morning!

You know her?

She's the town attorney and my fiancee.

What?

Nah, I'm just kiddin'.

She just likes me for my body.

You look great. You do something

different with your side view mirrors?

What do you want, Sally?

[Sighing] Come on, make this guy

fix the road. The town needs this.

No. I know his type. Racecar.

That's the last thing this town needs.

OK, I didn't want to have to do this,

Doc, but you leave me no choice.

Fellow citizens, you're all aware

of our town's proud history.

Here she goes again.

Radiator Springs,

the glorious jewel

strung on the necklace

of Route 66, the mother road!

It is our job and our pleasure

to take care of the travelers

- on our stretch of that road.

- Travelers? What travelers?

Ignore him.

But how, I ask you,

are we to care for those travelers

if there is no road

for them to drive on?

- Luigi, what do you have at your store?

- Tires.

And if no one can get to you?

I won't sell any... tires.

I will lose everything!

- Flo, what do you have at your store?

- I have gas.

- Lotsa gas!

- OK boys, stay with me.

And, Flo, what'll happen if no one

can come to your station to buy gas?

I'll go outta business and...

we'll have to leave town.

What's gonna happen if Flo

leaves town and closes her station?

- [All] Without gas, we're done for!

- What?

Don't you think the car responsible

should fix our road?

The only guy strong enough

to fix that road is Big Al!

Lizzie, Big Al left like, 15 years ago.

Then why are you bringing

him up, you lemon?

Oh, he can do it.

He's got the horsepower.

So, what do you want him to do?

[All] Fix the road!

- Because we are a town worth fixing!

- Yeah!

[All cheer]

[Honking] Order in the court!

Seems like my mind

has been changed for me.

- [All] Yeah!

- No!

[VW van] Nice ruling.

Oh, I am so not taking you to dinner.

[Chuckling] That's OK, Stickers.

You can take Bessie.

Man, you get to work with Bessie!

I'd give my left two lug nuts

for somethin' like that.

Bessie? Who's Bessie?

[Gurgling]

This here is Bessie,

finest road-pavin' machine ever built.

I'm hereby sentencing you

to community service.

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