Casino Jack Page #2

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-Ice tea?

-Thank you.

-Merlot with three ice cubes.

-Thank you.

Seriously, I think I once got a

lap dance from her on "Nexus Gold."

-I wouldn't know, Mikey. I'm married.

-I thought I recognized her too, si.

I liked the good lord would

prefer I have deaf ear on this one.

-We all set?

-Check! 18 holes,

St. Andrews, 5 stars hotel.

Hugh Fraser, the British

Open champion on hand

to give a lesson lolly f***ing doll.

Restaurants tour in Edinburgh,

two days stopover at the

Hyde Park Oriental in London.

Oh... VIP tickets to

The Lion King for Tom.

Nice soft grip, soft hand.

Take a whack at her. Come on.

Great shot!

Great! Now I gotta sandbag my drive

so Ponchos doesn't spew on his shoes.

Ponchos been prime to arrange that

he got his picture taken with Bush.

Three years ago, his tribe is weaving

pine needles and selling key chains.

Now he must be able to drive a

Hummer and buy condos in Hawaii.

You tell me why these clowns get to

own casinos and made 20 millions a year?

Well, I don't know? Maybe

that's not good enough

reason for you, champ?

-Are you part Mohawk now?

-Yes indeed, Kimosabe!

-One of the lost tribes of Israel.

-Yep yep. You tried to play Indian.

-No wonder they liked you so much.

-Background talking crowd.

You know what blows my mind?

All these Indians are so

damn rich and still acting

like Wal-mart shoppers.

He is a multi-millionaire,

Jack, with a $10 watch.

Listen, if you and I could

accessed some of that liquid,

-we would be running D.C. in no time.

-What are you suggesting?

I'm suggesting that they pay us a

ridiculous amount of money, okay.

And then, you and I can split

the fees 50-50 under the table.

It's a little tough on the

Chippewa, not to mention is it legal?

What are they gonna do? Cancel

my membership at the ACLU?

You know, I've got a

limit on what I can charge.

Shucks for you but I'm freelance, Jack!

I'm grass root, baby. You're always

complaining about living hand to mouth

You know what? You deserve better.

And Chief Shack-a-lot there, is

our ticket out of our leady health.

-That's it, chief.

-Okay, put together a pitch for Tonto,

-let's see what he says.

-It looks good.

Now chief, it's a simple thing.

Look, I've handled the Coushattas,

the Tiguas, the Aguas, Caliente's...

and I tell them all

the same thing, chief.

I know what it feels like

to be a persecuted minority.

Yeah, well it's about

time you guys in Washington

finally did something

good for Indian people.

Like give America back?

You've got a real sense of

humor, Jack. I like that.

Look! The casinos are a

plus if it's profitable.

But in reality the gaming

industry is very competitive.

You know, the Jena tribe, they want

to open up their own casino now.

-They're just one state away.

-Yeah, I know those guys.

They can be brutal.

They can shut you down mega

fast. No more Chippewa casinos.

You need our help, chief.

-You heard Mike's proposal?

-It's a tough call.

It's a hell of a fees you're asking for.

-Kind of a record, isn't it?

-But think of the billions

that you're gonna saved.

I can guaranteed you that goddamn

Jena tribe casino will never opens.

And before you know it, the Jena

tribe gonna be back selling moccasins.

You know, Mr. Abramoff, we

can't afford to lose this one.

You won't. Swear to God!

Give me five!

I told you, team Abramoff!

-Team Abramoff!

-To giving America back to the Indians

All hail to Washington

-biggest retainer.

-F***ing A!

You're no one in this town, if you

haven't met Jack f***ing A Abramoff.

-Take it easy, Bill.

Jack, you know I

believe my fianc Emily,

-everybody from the Bush's inaugural.

-I'll never forget that night.

McCain was in his office

pounding Bush bills: "We lost!"

It's very sincere moderate

believe from every voters.

Amen to that!

Hey, Jack. Those Polynesian

factories you wrapped

to make the blue jeans

on the Mariana Islands...

-Yeah, what about them?

-Words on the streets,

is they're goddamn sweat

shops and rape camps.

Oh, all you guys from the

Washington Post wants to be

Woodward Bernstein. F***ing pathetic.

That's so? The Labour

department just fined your client

$9 million dollars.

Must be for something.

Hey listen, bad breath. The mistakes

will happen but the truth is you can't

tell me those immigrants are making

more money than they would in China

-sending it back to their families.

-That's right,

we are greasing the wheels

with American dollars, baby.

-Capitalism at its finest.

-Doing the Lord's works.

Doesnt sound much like

American democracy to me.

Don't be stupid. No democracy,

no f***ing capitalism. No

capitalism, no f***ing democracy.

Chrissy only goddamn communists

slave-driven Bolshevism.

-Thank you, Joe McCarthy.

-F***ing elitist.

-What?

-What's wrong with you? Calm down.

Someone called 911.

Scott is a hemophilic.

You just hit a hemophilic reporter

from the Washington Post. Come on!

-Grey another bleeding liberal.

-It's okay. It's fine.

Did you see that?

This is not good.

-Enid, get Delay for me, will you?

-Should I remind him

of Bible class Thursday afternoon?

- Bible class is Thursday?

- Yeah... Jack.

Remember I switch it

with your golf game.

Well... Enid, you know

sometimes even those of us

who occupied the oval office

can have our senior moments.

Yes, Mr. President.

Oh Jack... Mr. Rouvelas is here.

Make sure I see it

before it goes out, okay!

Manny.

-Let's grab a coffee.

-Hey listen, if it's about

the Jarrell incident, no worries...

I fired him yesterday.

The guy was a loose cannon.

It's not like The Post is an

important paper in this town.

-Yeah, can we saved this for later?

-Bear with me, it's important.

Alright, Manny. So, where's the fire?

We hired you because the

partners felt we needed

someone who have friends

in the Bush administration.

It's not about friends,

Manny... it's about ideas.

Then you guys on the

right used to have ideas.

But now that communism is gone,

all you think about is money.

So you invite me out for an iced

vanilla cha just to remind me

that I'm a right wing fascist, that's

kind of beneath you, isn't it Manny!?

What's beneath me... Jack, are the

clients you dragged into my shop.

Bottom feeder in the rag

trade in the Mariana Islands.

You know there's an upside

for the poor Chinese.

They get to send money back to

their families in the mainland.

And look at all the great

works we're doing for

the Choctaw, the Chippewa...

That all sounds nice

and philanthropy, Jack-

but you're buddies with the White House.

Hell, you're the reason that idiot

cinched the Republican nomination.

That because we destroyed

McCain in the South.

Bush still owes you.

Why not used that? Aim a little

higher when bringing in clients.

-Such as? -Such as..

Fortune 500-company or two.

You mean rich, white people?

Listen, I've got a situation

in Florida with a client...

a very important client.

With your background in gaming,

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