Catch Hell Page #3

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in some pictures

with some pretty-ass b*tches.

God damn, look at this one.

I'll be you

said some things.

Hey, I gotta ask,

What was it like

working with Clint Eastwood?

Now, he's the sh*t.

That's a real f***ing man.

F***ing p*ssy.

Yeah.

Yeah, it's been a good run.

I mean,

don't get me wrong,

it f***ing sucks that

it's got to end this way,

but overall,

I've been a lucky man.

I've had pretty much

every experience

I ever wanted to.

Yeah.

Yeah, think I'm good.

Hey, Mike.

Yeah?

Let me tell you that story.

So, I gave her

a ride home from work, right?

She wanted me to see

this kitten she was keeping,

she found behind her

hotel a couple days before.

We talked, hung out,

had a few drinks.

And then she starts telling me

about her scumbag of a husband.

This motherf***er's

one of those

domineering, egotistical,

f***ing pieces of sh*t

with a perpetual need

to just eviscerate others

so he feels better

about himself.

You know, like,

to compensate

for his shortcomings.

I just listened, man.

She cried.

I wanted to

hold her, so I did.

She said I made

her feel like a woman.

Then she lead me

to the bedroom

and started

going down on me.

I was surprised,

but I didn't stop her.

After awhile,

she straddles me,

pulls her panties to the side,

put me inside her.

It was amazing...

for both of us.

When we finished

a couple hours later,

she told me I made

her come four times.

And then she laughed

when she told me

that you never had once.

I guess your tiny

rent-a-cop dick

ever could

get the job done.

Kill me.

Not yet.

I...

...ain't... done!

Here they are, Mike.

I got two of 'em.

Be back day after tomorrow,

finish this up.

I just totally

lost my sh*t in there.

Hope he makes it

till I get back.

Don't you f***ing go getting

soft and sweet on me, boy.

Man up!

Save that gas in the gennie.

Hey...

come here.

You done real good

so far, Junior.

I love you.

You a good nephew.

It's 'bout to be lunch.

She came up in here. She was

trying to fill up her belly

before she hibernating.

I just saved your life.

Now, a gator jaws snap shut

'bout 2000 pounds of force,

but once you up on it like this,

it ain't got

no muscle for opening.

Even one hand'll do.

Phew...

You welcome.

I never seen 'em come

all the way up inside before.

Probably smelled

all that blood in here,

heard you moaning,

thrashing around,

figured she could

get in on an easy meal.

Huh...

Best we get you

up off the floor.

All right...

There you go.

All right, get comfy.

Phew...

Hey, now, she a pretty

little b*tch, ain't she?

Hello?

Yeah, he breathin'.

I seen it.

No, he's still right there

on the floor where you left him.

All right, then.

Hey, Mike.

See you tomorrow.

You won't ever bring me down

Down, down, down, down, down

You won't ever bring me down

Down, down, down, down, down

You won't ever bring me

I can't escape

From the disdain

Your heart, your pain

Your drama is lame

I won't chastise

Even when you think you can

Bring me down

Already had my life

turned upside down

I ride a downward

spiral round and round

But I keep flying

I keep fighting

You won't ever bring me down

Down, down, down, down, down

You won't ever bring me

Down, down, down, down, down

You won't ever bring me

You can't bring me down

Already had my life

turned upside down

I ride a downward

spiral round and round

But I keep flying

I keep fighting

You won't ever bring me down

You won't ever bring me down

Down, down, down, down, down

You won't ever bring me down

Down, down, down, down, down

You won't ever bring me down

What'd you

come up or something?

Yeah, I guess I did.

Mm-hmm, yeah, okay.

Been through

the other way anyway.

Hey, Junior...

What is it?

I gotta piss

so f***ing bad, man.

Can you hold it?

Until when?

Don't make me

piss on myself again.

That's really f***ed up.

Okay, I guess

I'm-a unhook you, but...

you gotta keep those

hands in them cuffs, okay?

All right, careful

on that-that hand there.

Come on, I'm-a get you up.

Oh, let's go

get you drained.

I can't walk, bro.

My feet are tied together.

Um...

I'm not going to run.

My legs are f***ed

and I don't even know

where the f*** we are.

Okay, all right.

I know what I'm-a do.

I'm-a hold this

bungee end like a tether.

And if you run,

I'm-a snap you down, okay?

Okay.

Come on.

Toilet's behind that wall.

Don't even think about it.

I don't want to

have to hurt you extra.

All right, now,

I'm-a stay out here.

You go on

and do your business.

Sh*t...

You all right in there?

Yeah.

Come on,

let's get you going.

That's Mike.

He's checking in.

I got to answer

that mobile phone.

Get you on the cot.

Come on!

Come on.

Come on, come on, come on.

Mike?!

Is everything okay?

Yeah, Mike.

Everything's great.

Then why the f***

didn't you pick up the phone,

you f***ing crackhead?

I went for it,

but it went quiet.

What's he doing?

Same as before,

when you left.

I got this, Mike.

All right then.

Between now and when I get back,

that phone rings,

best you pick up

or I'll have two piles of sh*t

to deal with.

I'll do it.

Junior...

What's he going

to do to me?

I mean,

how's this supposed to end?

What's the plan?

You're okay with just

letting him kill me?

'Cause you seem

like a good dude.

Thank you.

I ain't

running this thing.

Yo, he called me up,

said he had a job.

You supposed to help out family.

Even though he don't

come 'round there

too much no more,

he's still my uncle.

So, you can live with that?

Your uncle's f***ing nuts, man.

His wife never

told me she was married,

and the truth is

I barely touched her.

How do you know he's not

planning on killing you too?

You think he gives

a f*** about you?

You're the only witness.

What if he tries to

frame you for this sh*t?

The guy's a f***ing psycho.

I don't really feel

like talking no more.

I think it's best

we get some sleep.

And how about

this Regan Pearce?

This guy is making

Charlie Sheen

look like Tom Hanks.

Have you seen his Twitter feed?

Oh, you filthy perverts.

Well, needless to say,

the two ladies in the

photographs are very upset.

Yes!

And from what I understand,

Regan's rabbi is furious.

God damn, it's a shiny day!

You don't look so good, bro.

Sun might do you some good.

Yo, I figure if

I chain you to that cot,

I could set you in the doorway.

Sun'll bounce on you real nice.

Okay, let's get you going.

Let me know

if you get too hot.

I'll help you off

with your shirt.

Put some sun cream on you.

Yeah, I'm right here, Mike.

That's good, Junior.

I'm just checking in.

Everything's sweet.

When do you think

you're getting back in?

Soon as I get off work.

I told you, it's my alibi.

Well, what's my alibi, Mike?

You don't need one, baby boy.

Okay.

Figure I'll get there

about 1:
30 in the morning or so

and we'll finish this thing up.

So, 1:
30,

I'll see you then.

What are you doing here?

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