Chasers

Synopsis: A hapless Navy grunt is assigned SP duty. The catch: he must escort a beautiful female prisoner on her way to prison for going UA. She in turn will try anything to escape.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Dennis Hopper
Production: Warner Home Video
 
IMDB:
5.0
Rotten Tomatoes:
33%
R
Year:
1994
102 min
290 Views


Hey! What the hell's

going on here?

Today's a big flag day.

lt's the Fourth of July.

Yeah! Yeah!

Fourth of July! Discharged!

l'm out of here!

Discharge!

All right, l'm out of here!

One more day!

Discharge! So long, suckers!

Stig speaking.

lt's Mr. Devane.

Oh, yes, sir.

l've been expecting your call.

You're working on the 4th?

-l'm gonna be working late.

-How's my baby?

l'm looking right at it.

She's completely loaded.

Everything you want.

lt's got a phone in there.

The Riccaro buckets.

Everything you wanted.

Loaded.

But when you phone in your order...

...and wire in cash, you're one

of our preferred customers.

l'll be in tonight. You'll recognize

me by the smile on my face.

Right.

-Morning, sweetheart.

-How you doing?

Morning, sexy.

-Good morning.

-Morning.

-How did you remember my birthday?

-How could l forget, gorgeous?

You are so sweet.

Same day as the frigging country.

Processing,section 7, Finster here.

-Hello?

-Howard. Storage room.

Howard?

Howard?

Storage room, five minutes.

No.

-Howard?

-No, no.

Howard, you listen to me.

Get your ass in that storage room.

No! No, no, no.

Howard?

The guy's a designer.

He works out of a loft in L.A.

He calls me, l tell him

what l can get, and boom!

He wants 1000 dress-white

bell-bottoms.

1000, Howard.

Now, Howard...

...l got him to 1 2 bucks a pair.

That's 1 2 grand COD.

l can't believe you're trying

to pull something like this...

...on the last day before discharge.

No!

Howard, my hand to God...

...this is the last, final one.

The last one was the last and

final one, and the time before that...

...was the last and final one.

l'm getting hives again.

l thought you'd be thanking me.

l'm talking an extra six grand each.

This much inventory has to be

split into separate lots...

...each with its own manifest, each

with its own point of entry. No!

l didn't realize it'd be

such a problem.

l never would've transferred

a consignment and re-routed a truck.

These are the invoice numbers.

Take them.

l mean, if you don't make it disappear,

we could be in some serious sh*t.

l've gotta get on this immediately.

Come here and give me a hug.

That's it, pal. Good, good.

All right.

-How about lunch later?

-Hey, Eddie.

Master Chief wants to see you ASAP.

You just can't stop, can you?

lf l did, you wouldn't love me.

Come in.

You asked for me?

Yes, l did.

l won't hoist half-sails with you.

Those SPs outside...

...they're here for you.

Due to the holiday...

...the N.A. is short of bodies.

So your name came up.

N.A., chief?

Naval Apprehension, son.

They got a prisoner brigged

at Camp Lejeune Weapons Center.

Gotta transfer him back here to

Charleston, and that someone is you.

They need somebody for chaser duty.

Chaser duty.

The trouble with youth is

that they shirk their duty.

No, no. Never behind the desk.

Your name was on the computer

because you're unassigned.

That means you don't have new orders.

No, but l'm discharged tomorrow.

Yeah, well, your availability...

...combined with your experience

at base security...

...got you this detail.

You should be proud of it.

Begging your pardon, chief.

A colleague in personnel can

cancel this obvious mistake.

Forget about that. Orders are orders,

and you're in the Navy.

But chief, it's my last day.

l had plans.

Change them. Dismissed.

One last time.

Very last time.

That guy could sell a freezer

to an Eskimo.

That gay thing, man. Congress is

full of black, gay sympathizers.

Oh, wow.

Destroy the evidence.

They'll go to Eddie's desk first.

l love you, Mom.

l love you, Dad.

-Hi, Howard.

-Hello.

-How are you?

-Good.

l need to make a call.

Can you stop at that phone booth?

Thank you, l appreciate it.

F***ing redneck.

What'd you say?

Nothing. l was just thinking

how sad it is when cousins marry.

My friend.

Yo, Rock. What's the hap?

Scuttlebutt is...

...your last partner busted himself up

chasing some brother.

Should've shot that motherf***er.

Why you still driving this piece

of sh*t? We just got a new rig.

We're ready to break her in. We're

gonna kick some asses this morning.

Bunch of Marieletos holding people up

down near Patriots Point.

We figure they'll hit today.

Reason being, everyone's celebrating.

We're gonna f*** us up some beaners.

Hi, chief, how you doing?

ls there a pay phone around?

lntroduce Rock to his new partner.

What'd you say your name was, sis?

How could you confuse me

with your sis?

Her dick's much bigger than mine.

Sh*t! Goddamn!

-Goddamn, man! He ducked!

-What the f***?!

About that phone....

lt could wait.

Wear it.

Sign for it.

Wear it.

Does it have a name?

Eddie Devane. Of course,

you can call me Ed or Edward.

How about l just call you a**hole,

and you answer to it?

That'd be a first.

Listen up, a**hole.

You're here because the Navy requires

two people to transport a prisoner.

l don't need you, l don't want you,

and l don't want to repeat myself.

l've had hundreds of partners.

The smart ones stay out of my way.

The ones who don't...

...come back worse off than

the prisoners.

You f*** with me...

...l will make this trip the longest

six hours of your life.

Now, get in the van!

This thing go any faster?

There's a guy running alongside

asking for a ride.

l got things to do tonight.

l get out tomorrow, you know?

lt's cool. Discharge is honorable.

That's hard to believe.

Why's that?

Let's just say l've been

doing this job for a while.

Meaning what?

l could see you from

a mile away, slick.

That tailored uniform, a wad of bills

in your pocket...

...you look like the poster boy

for petty crime.

Maybe not even so petty.

Leave it alone, it's broken.

Two bacon chilidogs, large fries

and a large root beer.

Hey, buddy.

That won't do you no good.

lt's broken.

l'll take your order.

Well, two bacon chilidogs,

a large fries and a large root beer.

We got no bacon chilidogs.

-Since when?

-Since l've worked here.

Wait, l've been here at least

50 times. l always have those dogs.

So what?

-l'll have a Flying Pig burger.

-l'm not finished.

Just giving you time to look.

Come on, pop. What'll it be?

Pop?

Listen up, we can always go

somewhere else to eat.

What? Oh, no.

You'd take your business elsewhere?

Hey, you know what?

Beat it!

-What?!

-Go f*** yourself!

l'm gonna kill you, you f***ing pig!

Oh, great.

Next food, 68 miles.

Pop!

l should've popped him,

that civilian weenie.

How old are you?

That's not the point.

The point is, he had no manners.

That's what's wrong with this country.

You're just not good with people.

You're pushing it.

You're great when

they're wearing cuffs.

Otherwise you got as much charm as

a bulldozer. l'll give you advice--

l gave you some when we started

this detail.

Don't hit people head-on. lf you

want something, try the back door.

-That's usually open.

-Like your mouth.

Go on.

Ollie North's a fag!

Welcome to Jarhead City.

Look at them.

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Joe Batteer

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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