Christmas in Connecticut Page #9

I... Gosh, I guess I couldn't say anything.

I know. It's all so lovely.

So lovely.

You're lovely too.

Go on, don't stop.

- You're making fun of me.

- No.

I'm having fun,

I admit that, but believe me...

...if I'm making fun of anybody,

it's Elizabeth Lane.

- Why?

- Oh, she's so smart. Knows all the answers.

Gets herself into a mess and hasn't

the moral courage to get herself out of it.

You're not very happy, are you?

Well, I'm as happy

as I have any right to be.

I think you deserve all

the happiness in the world.

You do?

I think you're wonderful.

You do?

- Maybe we'd better turn back.

- No. Not yet.

Okay.

I'm going to spend

the night at me sister's.

That makes 50,000 I owe myself.

I'm going to spend

the night at me sister's.

Mrs. Gerzeg worked overtime tonight...

...and she'll be coming along

pretty soon for her baby.

If she cries, you better change her.

Mrs. Gerzeg?

Never mind. Skip it.

Good night.

Hey, you.

Hey.

Where do you think you're going?

That's what we'd like to know.

Stealing my sleigh

for a joy ride, huh?

- Well, get out.

- Oh, we didn't steal it.

That's what you say. You're four miles

from where Mr. Harper parked it.

- Holy smokes.

- You didn't get very far, did you?

The horse just walked away

with us accidentally.

- Oh, sure.

- Tell that to the judge, will you?

- You mean, you're arresting us?

- That's right, lady.

- Isn't that wonderful?

- Sorry, lady. In the car.

- Mister, really...

- All right, Harper. There's your sleigh.

- You better show up to prefer charges.

- Thanks, sheriff.

Yoo-hoo.

It's me, Mrs. Gerzeg.

I've come for my baby.

Hey! Hey!

Felix!

Felix!

Where is everybody?

Give me the police. The state troopers.

The FBI. Quick!

This is Alexander Yardley.

Certainly it's an emergency!

A baby has been kidnapped.

- Kidnapped?

- Yes.

Look. Don't get excited.

Everything is hunky-dunky.

Are you out of your mind?

Do you realize what this baby

means to my circulation?

- Mr. Yardley, please.

- No, don't argue with me. Get Sloan.

Go down to the town hall

and bring him back immediately.

Hello. Is this the state police?

This is Alexander Yardley.

Yes, the Alexander Yardley.

The Smart Housekeeping baby

has been kidnapped!

- Can we have a description of the baby?

- Photographs?

- We're from the Daily Press.

- How old was the baby?

He's 8 months old. A boy.

He has blond hair and teeth.

- Blond hair and teeth?

- No, no.

- No blond hair? No teeth?

- That's right.

I'll give a $25,000 reward

for the return of that baby.

Twenty-five grand.

It's the Elizabeth Lane baby,

the most famous baby.

- Where are its parents?

- Here's Sloan.

- Will you give us a story?

- Quiet, please. He doesn't know yet.

Come inside, my boy. I have something

to tell you. Keep a stiff upper lip.

Excuse me.

- I'm sorry about the arrest, Mrs. Sloan.

- That's all right.

If we'd realized who you people were,

it wouldn't have happened.

- Well, good night, ma'am.

- Good night.

Good night? It's morning.

Imagine us being arrested.

Your husband won't think it's so funny

coming home at 7 in the morning.

Oh, they all went to bed hours ago.

We seem to have company.

Yeah.

- No?

- No.

Elizabeth, where've you been?

- Yes, where have you been?

- When did you last see the baby?

Quiet, everybody.

Where do you suppose she's been?

She's been out searching every nook

and cranny for her lost baby, of course.

- My lost baby?

- There, there, Mrs. Sloan.

You mustn't collapse now.

No, indeed. You must be brave.

- Hold still, Mr. Jones.

- Did you get any ransom note?

Take it easy, boys.

Mr. Jones is just out of hospital.

Go into the kitchen, Jones.

Felix has some coffee for you.

Boys, you realize Mrs. Sloan

has had a very trying time.

I will let you know

of any further developments.

We'll take care of everything.

We'll have an extra

on the street in an hour.

- The second you hear news, let me know.

- I will.

Now, what is this all about?

Fine time to be asking what it's all about.

Lucky for you, I prevented the press

from printing the truth...

...whilst you've been gallivanting about

all night.

I've been in jail.

- In jail?

- Your baby.

- What about my baby?

- It isn't here, dear.

- Of course it isn't.

- No. I saw it being kidnapped.

Our baby, the Smart Housekeeping baby.

- Kidnapped?

- As I came home I saw a woman...

...in a cloak and hood go out of this house

carrying your baby in her arms.

- Oh, that. Don't get so excited.

- Elizabeth.

Well, of all the heartless, callous,

irresponsible women...

...l've ever met in my whole life.

You can sit there and tell me not to get

excited while your own baby...

Be careful, Mr. Yardley,

or you'll have a stroke.

This is incredible.

This is fantastic.

Here, I believe you to be the finest,

the most exemplary wife and mother.

Mr. Yardley, if you'd just sit down

and calm yourself...

Of all the brazen, cheap...

I suppose you've fallen in love with this

young whippersnapper, hero Jones?

Well, frankly, I... I have.

So your husband and child

no longer mean anything to you.

Well, let me tell you something,

Mrs. Sloan.

If you feel no moral responsibility

towards your husband and child...

...I have a magazine to protect.

If you think you can make a mockery

of Yardley Publications, you're mistaken.

My public believe in you.

Millions of women in these United States

pattern their daily lives after that feature.

You'll live up to their ideals,

or my name is not Alexander Yardley!

But if you'd just let me talk a minute.

You see, John and I were never married.

Never married?

Such blatant immorality!

But you don't understand.

We meant to get married.

Yes. But we never got around to it.

You mean to stand there and tell me

the Smart Housekeeping baby is...

- No. Oh, no.

- Oh, no. No.

Thank heaven, at last.

- You'll be rewarded, my good woman.

- Good morning.

Two babies?

Which one is yours, Mrs. Sloan?

- Hers?

- You make fun.

- These are our babies.

- Nora. She takes care of them.

- While we are at the war plant.

- We're on the early shift today.

- Yes, darling. Goodbye.

- Thank you so much.

Will someone take this...? This...?

What are you doing to that child?

- What am I...?

- Give it to me.

The poor little thing.

- Nora, you'd better take them upstairs.

- Indeed, I will that.

There now.

There now.

The poor things.

If it's not asking too much,

will you explain?

It's all very simple.

I have never lived on a farm before.

- Never lived...?

- No, I have no husband and no baby.

And she can't cook.

No husband? No baby?

Well, of all the dirty, scoundrelly tricks

to play.

But, Mr. Yardley, we were only trying

to protect the feature for you.

Do you realize what you've done?

My face will be in all the papers.

I'll be the laughing stock

of the publishing business.

Give me the police.

This is Yardley, Alexander Yardley.

It was all a mistake. The baby's all right.

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