Confessions of a Superhero Page #9

---

We're going by numbers,

all right?

Well, my outfit

is actually based

On the actual Christopher reeve

outfit from the movie, so...

[theme from superman playing]

%%

We'll see.

I think that I've got

a really great Chance.

[cheers and applause]

(Dennis)

sounds like they're calling us.

But anyhow, yeah,

I think my chances are great.

[man over microphone]

well, without further ado,

Let's get this show

on the road.

[cheers and applause]

Come on, 16.

[man over microphone]

okay, without further ado,

We are going to announce

our winners.

In third place, number eight,

Cindy Brucheski.

[applause]

Okay, second place,

number 19, Scott Romine.

[applause]

All right,

first place,

The winner of the superhero

costume contest,

$1,000 goes to

contestant number nine.

[screams and applause]

Why don't you step up

on stage here if you can?

I want to thank everybody

who voted for me.

I appreciate it.

All right,

Again, great job,

everyone that participated,

Everyone that made

the long trips from California,

New jersey,

South Carolina.

Great job.

Thanks, everybody,

for coming out.

[cheers and applause]

[male announcer]

you're watching eyewitness news

in high definition.

Batman behind bars.

It's been a bad day

for the caped crusader

Who's become the latest

Hollywood street performer

To end up in LAPD Custody,

And this one,

like many of the others,

Was caught on tape.

The LAPD told me that Batman

was arrested and charged

With disorderly conduct.

They also say

he kicked out a window

In one of the patrol cars

And is spending

a little extra time in jail.

Robin, the boy wonder,

wasn't around today

To spring his partner

from the clutches

Of Batman's nemesis,

the LAPD

Police say Batman landed himself

in this predicament

When he insisted

on using the porta-potties

Rented by union workers

picketing a local business.

You can see the argument

between union workers

And Batman begins to escalate.

At one point,

Batman removes his cape

And appears to taunt

the union workers.

Then Chewbacca shows up

And also appears

to confront the picketers.

The LAPD Swoop in

and arrest Batman

Who now joins other

notable arrested characters

Like Captain Incredible, Elmo,

and Cookie Monster.

(Gehrt)

I was gonna make ramen noodles,

The only thing

I know how to cook.

(Chris)

well, now you tell me.

What's there

to do tonight?

I don't know.

What do you want to do?

You could go and--

what's that movie that came out

You want to see?

Well, yeah.

Well, why are you asking me

what you should do

When you don't even care

what I say?

No, I care what you said,

but I, well,

I was trying to figure out

what to do.

Well, I told you what to do.

Look at your hair

on the floor.

Well, why don't you

vacuum it, husband?

You're supposed to

take care of me.

(man)

what's going on

with you and your husband?

[laughs]

Um...

Can anyone tell

That question

made me uncomfortable?

"what's going on

with you and your husband?"

Okay, so about a month ago--

and I take full blame for this--

I'm very hard to deal with.

I'm very high-maintenance

when it comes to attention.

And he's just not willing

to supply it right now.

He doesn't have time

for that right now.

He's focused on himself

and his career goals,

And yadda-yadda-yadda.

And there's no room

for his little wife right now.

(man)

so what now?

I don't know.

I tried to--

I tried to go out and watch

a movie with him yesterday even,

And it wasn't the same.

We don't talk to each other

the same.

We don't look at each other

the same.

It's just cold.

I still love him, always will,

but it's just cold now.

And it's like

there used to be an intensity

When we touched each other,

And now it's just like,

"ppthh, don't touch me,

And I'm annoyed by you."

And I'm just angry all the time,

and I'm not an angry person,

And I don't want to be angry.

I want to be happy.

And he keeps acting like

he can make me happy,

And he used to--

could make me happy.

And now I just--

it's just out of reach,

And I don't even remember

what it's like.

[man over microphone]

we have a Christopher reeve

look-alike from L.A.

Out here today.

Christopher Dennis

is back there,

And he's got a few things

he'd like to say real briefly.

The person running it said,

"we have Christopher Dennis,

"a Christopher reeve look-alike

with us tonight,

And he has something

that he'd like to say."

Bonnie, would you please

do me the honor

And make

my life complete,

And would you marry me?

Yes, I'll marry you.

(man)

yeah, perfect.

[applause]

[man over microphone]

ladies and gentlemen,

The future Mr. And Mrs.

Christopher Dennis.

Thank you.

And I remember seeing

this superman ring,

Which I now have

on my hand,

In his hand.

And I remember him saying,

"Bonnie,"

But after that,

I don't remember

any more exact words.

All I remember is,

he asked me to marry him,

And I said, "yes."

(man)

mazel tov.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

[man over microphone]

we need to round

off the numbers.

I am getting change,

so we'll make it 436.

Kind of reminds me a little bit

Of that first moment

that I met Chris,

And I also was at a loss

for words and temporarily

What was going on around me,

Because I was so mesmerized

by Chris.

[applause]

(Allen)

this is just set security.

I do security full-time

now that Summer's over.

I do, you know,

Monday through Friday.

It's usually anywhere between

12 to 16 hours a day.

And more or less, we just--

we make sure--

We establish, you know,

a security boundary around it,

Watching the equipment,

watching the crew,

Watching the trucks.

I like being on set

on the fact

That maybe a director

will see me and say,

"you know, hey, let's use him,

give him a shot."

So at least I'm here

in the business itself.

A person, you know, who

does have an anger problem,

It just--

it's a snap of something.

Snap of something

inside his mind,

Inside his heart.

Something snaps,

you know what I'm saying?

I need to find out

what makes me snap.

It's only the bad people

that I get mad at.

You know what I'm saying?

Everybody else

has no problem with me.

But then there's some people

that I have walked away with,

'cause I know

they're as dumb as dogs,

And it's like a stupid dog.

You can beat the dog,

But he's still gonna sh*t

on the floor.

You know what I'm saying?

So to some people, I just--

I let a lot of people walk away,

But there's just some

that I don't.

They need it.

They need to be beaten down

to open their eyes,

And all I'm doing

is volunteering for the job.

Really, some people

need to be beaten down.

They need it.

Okay, really.

And yeah, and so that's all

there is to it.

(woman)

are you doing the action?

No, I'm just standing there,

acting cool.

I'm playing the part

and the role of Leroy Jackson,

You know what I'm saying?

On the cool set

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes