Correcting Christmas Page #3

So you really dated that guy

in high school, huh?

What? No.

Why would you

think that?

Oh, I... no,

I mean, you live

across the street from him.

I figured maybe...

No.

No, Nick's always

felt just as much

like a brother to me

as Jason.

Just checking.

Deck the hall

with boughs of holly

Fa la la, la la,

la la, la la

'Tis the season

to be jolly

Fa la la, la la,

la la, la la

- Don we now...

- You know, Dad,

I could've gotten to your

place from the airport.

They have these things now called cabs.

That is

a waste of money.

Come on. You know how much

a taxi would cost out here.

Dad, you think everything's

a waste of money.

No, that's not true. Your

father likes nice things.

He just wants to pay as

little as possible for them.

And join the chorus...

That's just

a diplomatic way

to admit

that he's cheap.

Yeah, Dad's

Scotch-Canadian.

In the world of cheapness,

that's a blackjack.

I heard that.

Good, than we won't

have to say it again.

You know, Jason,

if you'd taken a cab,

you might've missed

the toy drive.

You know, you could've

just written a check.

Now, where is

the fun in that?

Oh, first fun thing

just happened.

Can't feel my butt.

- Thank you.

- Oh, thank you, sir.

All right. Same bet

as every year.

He or she who wraps

the fewest gifts

gets to wash the Christmas dinner dishes

tomorrow at our house.

This could be great.

I don't like that bet.

I never have.

That's 'cause you're

a perfectionist.

If you'd just

cut out that nonsense,

you would stop

losing every year.

You know what?

I like pretty wrappings,

and I refuse

to rush the process.

Okay, Mom, these presents

are the only ones

these kids

are gonna get.

I don't think they're

gonna notice the wrappings.

Yeah,

but I would.

Yes, and civilization

as we know it would end.

Oh, I'd pipe down if I

were you, Mr. Giggles.

Next to Mom,

you're the absolute

worst gift wrapper

in this group.

Dad, think

about that bet.

I don't own

a single dish.

Do you really

want me washing yours?

Uh, let me

answer that for you.

No.

These gifts, these are

for needy children, right?

Yes.

Okay, so if

you're a needy kid,

do you need a doll?

Why not

a useful gift instead?

Each kid gets a toy

and something useful,

like you said,

shoes or clothes.

Okay, so why

the toy at all?

That's all

I'm saying.

Why not

two useful gifts?

You were a child

at one point, right?

Heh.

I mean besides

this moment right now.

I'm just saying it

seems like a big waste.

Well, you know what?

I doubt there's

much magic in their lives.

You know, when your

whole life is about need,

it's probably

a welcome distraction

to have

something frivolous.

Aha! You admit

it's frivolous.

See?

Look, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I know

you love Christmas.

I just... I've never

caught the whole

magic of the season

fever.

Just always seemed a

bit ridiculous to me.

I'm starting to see things

a little more your way.

Hold on a second.

Last night, you are

wearing antlers

and literally

chasing me

around the house

with mistletoe.

This morning,

you're gonna wake up,

and all of a sudden,

you give up

on the holiday spirit

altogether?

I've not given up on it.

I just... I think I've been

focusing on it too much.

You know, it doesn't

matter that it's Christmas.

What matters is

that some little girl

is gonna get

a nice doll

that we wrapped

and that we get to spend time

with the people that we love.

Like me?

Of course.

Come here.

Mmm.

Eggnog for

my darling girl,

and sparkling water

for my darling guy.

And if it turns out

to be champagne,

whoops, my bad.

We're out of paper.

I'm gonna go

get some more.

Okay.

Does Ali seem a bit weird to you today?

Oh, Ali's always

a little weird.

It's part of her charm.

Oh, these are all

gonna have to be redone.

Excuse me. I need

some more wrapping paper.

Sure thing, doll.

Anything in particular?

What are you doing here?

What aren't

I doing here?

I'm the wrapping

manager.

Getting no help!

So I really get to redo

Christmas Eve with Cam?

You said that was the

part you wanted to do over.

You got your wish.

But how?

And why me?

Okay, did you see

"Men in Black"?

Yes.

This is

nothing like that.

Did you see

"Back to the Future"?

Yes.

It's nothing like that.

Okay, look,

you brought me here.

Well, maybe,

but from

here on out,

you're on your own,

chickadee.

I'm just here in case you

need any further guidance,

which you will.

Yeah. Well, okay,

give me some further guidance on this.

Cam just told me

that he's never understood Christmas.

So you claim

neither do you anymore.

Right, but that's...

that's not the point.

The point is that

he's never said that.

He never said it

a year ago.

He's never

said it ever.

And...

Well, isn't this supposed

to be all like dj vuish?

Aren't people

supposed to be saying

the same things

they said last year,

and then I get a chance to

respond differently and fix things?

Okay.

I see the problem here.

What we need is

a basic physics lesson

before we proceed

with your Christmas redo.

Physics?

Yes.

It's something called

the Heisenberg

Uncertainty Principle,

which says that the very

act of observing something

inherently changes it.

Okay.

So I can't violate

the laws of physics,

other than

time travel.

You got it.

Heh heh heh.

Okay, but so how am I supposed

to know what's gonna happen next

if everything is

happening differently

than I remember it

the first time?

I know, right?

Those guys in "Groundhog

Day" had it easy.

Come on!

$5 for whoever

can catch me.

You'll never catch me.

I'm the king of toys,

I'm the king of toys

Can't catch me.

Sorry, Cam.

I got distracted.

Oh, hey, uh...

- Sorry.

- Let me help you.

Ali, look...

I know...

that you are

a big stickler

for holiday tradition,

okay? Yes.

But I was just

wanting to give you

your big present,

um, early,

not Christmas morning,

but instead tonight.

Before you say anything,

I just feel

like it would be

a lot more romantic

that way.

Big present.

I'm not answering

any questions,

not giving you

any hints.

Sure.

Whenever you want.

Whenever I want?

Did I...

this is coming

from the girl who last

Christmas, I was eating,

remember, the 11th day

of Christmas chocolate

on the ninth day

of Christmas,

and you got

so upset with me?

I didn't get upset.

I believe

your exact words were,

"You wrecked Christmas. "

Yeah, okay,

that rings a bell.

You know what? But this

is the new and improved,

more flexible Ali.

Well, I... I like

this new Ali.

You should

keep her around.

That's the plan.

Oh, I'm thinking

strawberries

and gorgonzola

for the salad tomorrow.

Why don't we throw in some sunflower

seeds, give it a little texture?

Ooh, I love that.

So how are things going at work, kitten?

Dad, I'm 30.

I'm not a kitten anymore.

You'll always

be my kitten.

You're gonna have

to deal with that.

- Things are good.

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