Dark Days

When I first came down into the tunnel,

it looked dangerous, man.

It was lookin' real dangerous,

'cause even in the daytime it was dark.

And, like, I was scared.

I said, "Somewhere down the line,

it can't be bad as it is up top".

Because out in the street,

you had kids f***in' with you.

You had the police f***in' with you.

I mean, anybody can walk by you

while you're sleeping on a bench

and bust you in the head.

At least down in the tunnel,

you ain't gotta worry about that.

'Cause ain't nobody in their right mind

gonna come down there.

So you ain't got to worry about nobody

comin' down there messin' with you.

'Cause they're not.

They gonna be too scared

to come in there.

But to me, once you get past your fears,

the first or second night-

See, after that, man, you adjust.

You'd be surprised what the human mind

and the human body can adjust to.

- Tommy.

- What?

Damn, man, I'm tired.

I'm tired, yo.

Give out.

Mmm.

I could sleep

for about two or three-

I guess about

two or three more hours.

I don't feel like getting up.

Mmm.

Sh*t. It's f***in' late.

Or early.

- I gotta take a f***in' piss.

- Good morning, people.

Good morning, yeah.

Do me a favor, man.

Bring you back an empty bottle?

No. Take it out for me.

Sure.

- It's f***ing cold, man.

- It is.

It probably just feels cold.

It's probably like yesterday.

Sh*t.

I'll get up. I'm ready.

Ready to hit the street.

When I first came down,

I was scared to death, man.

Scared that- Not scared. Just lookin'

at this goddamn place and sh*t.

I said, "Damn".

At that time,

the only reason I came down here -

just to get out the public eyesight.

But as I looked around and sh*t

and started noticing sh*t,

I started building and sh*t, man.

And that sh*t just became

into like a little project.

At first, I took it as a little camp

for two weeks.

And then this f***er became like home.

After, I start building.

Found, you know, stuff that I can use -

clothes, TVs, lamps.

Got power.

That camping sh*t, it went right away.

Left right out my goddamn mind

and sh*t.

You know what I'm sayin'?

And look at me now.

I been down here

for f***in' five years, goin' on six.

Who knows it's been that long,

you know? It's been that f***in' long.

I just forgot completely

about the damn time.

I see the place

looks a little cleaner.

Yeah, but, you know,

it's the f***in' dog, man.

Ever since I got that dog, the

f***in' place been f***ed up, man.

What you mean it looks a little

cleaner? It looks terrible.

I was just being sarcastic.

I can see the dog

chews everything up and sh*t.

Yeah, man.

It's hard to keep a place clean

with a dog. -Mm-hmm.

Especially out here.

He drags everything in.

Was it clean before?

Yeah, it was always- It used to be

real nice and clean. -Yeah, it was.

He used to make us

take off our shoes.

Almost every time I came in,

he had a different rug on.

Yup. Every couple of days,

he'd put on another rug, another rug.

The place was really nice,

you know.

And he was always working

on the house. Yeah.

Like what?

Fixing the door. Always the door. If

not the inside door, the outside door.

Working on the roof.

Making the trapdoor to get out

and escape, to come in.

Putting a window in.

Then he take the window out.

You know? All kinds of stuff.

He even had a ladder in here.

Oh, the ladder, yeah. Used to be

in this corner. -Yeah, I took it out.

It used to go

straight up to the roof.

And he was putting a balcony

up there. Then he changed his mind.

He's the only one that I ever see

working on their house.

Everybody else like they's just-

No, they got some nice houses

here, bro.

Yeah, but I've seen 'em.

They did their house,

but then they never did

anything else to it.

Whenever I used to come down here,

I'd always see him working on his house.

I thought I had the nicest house

down here. -Yeah.

But I don't, bro. Well,

it don't look nice now. -Yeah.

But I don't have the nicest house.

You know who got

the nicest house down here?

- Tom. Tommy.

- Tommy? Yeah.

Tommy's got the nicest house.

But he's been down here

a long time, sh*t, though.

No. Tommy's been down here about

maybe a year longer than I have.

A lot of my friends, you know,

a lot of my fellas come down here.

Like, my boy came down

last night to visit me. -Yeah.

He brought one of his boys

from school down here.

Ain't never been down here.

The kid like to sh*t on himself...

when he came in

and saw the place and sh*t.

Hey, that ain't no help to you.

Well, you feel good about it,

I guess, you know.

You think you're livin' outside,

and it ain't as outside as you think.

- Make you feel a little better, yeah.

- Oh, yeah.

You ain't much tramp as he thought

he was when he walkin' down the track.

- That's exactly-

- That always make you feel good.

I don't consider myself homeless,

'cause a homeless man

ain't got a home.

If you don't consider yourself homeless,

then you ain't ready

to cope with this then.

If you don't consider you homeless.

Well, I mean, I do.

It's, like, in the back of my mind.

It's way back in the back of your mind

if you don't consider you homeless.

You know that? You got it a little

too far in the back of your mind.

But what's the purpose- What was the

purpose of me building this place, right?

It's not to be helpless.

That don't say you ain't homeless.

- This stop you from being helpless.

- Oh, yeah.

But if you consider you ain't homeless

once you get down here,

you're not doin'

but throwin' brakes on your life.

Sh*t. I got real comfortable down here

in this f***in' dump and sh*t, man.

Let's face it, man.

I mean, like, down here,

didn't have to pay no bills, no nothin'.

Look at me. I'm shavin' with-

I'm using power right now...

and I ain't even got to pay

the motherfuckin' bills and sh*t.

I mean, that's part of comfortability

and sh*t. You know what I'm sayin'?

Turn the TV on, leave the TV on all night.

Ain't gotta worry about paying Con Ed.

You know?

That's f***ed up, but that's one reason

how I got so comfortable and sh*t.

You know?

In the winter time, I don't freeze.

Summer time, I don't burn up.

You know? All they don't got

down here is running water.

And we did have that down here,

believe it or not, at one time.

We had running water.

Of course I got f***in' comfortable, man.

Got too goddamn comfortable.

That's why I'm really

pissed off at myself, man.

'Cause I, like, lost five, six years

of my motherfuckin' life

being down in this motherf***er.

Man, I'm gettin' ready to

go out and make me some money.

I got to get paid.

Got to make that almighty dollar.

So, what's happenin'?

How you go about doin' that?

I got to do my normal, man.

I got to go out,

try to find me something to sell.

First I got to find out what I got here

from last night.

I got these off of 75th Street.

CDs. You know what I'm sayin'?

I can sell these

to my man on 82nd Street.

And these some good CDs.

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