Darling

I do want our readers to feel

that this is really your story.

So I thought I'd ask you a few questions...

and if you'd just answer them

in your own words...

Yes, I see. All right, ask away.

Let's start at the beginning, shall we?

I had a terribly ordinary childhood,

I'm afraid.

Born at an early age, and all that.

Fell off lots of bicycles,

ate too many cream cakes...

A normal childhood, you know.

This is me, age six.

Probably a piece of chewing gum

stuck under my hat, only you can't see.

I do remember...

I was always the sort of child

who got picked on to do things.

What a darling little baby he is.

Joseph is actually my older sister, Felicity.

I told everyone she had grown the beard

especially for the part.

Felicity, poor thing, was not amused.

You must be very proud of her, Mrs. Scott.

She's a darling.

She's going to go a long way.

You can see that.

Yes, I think she is.

This is me, age 20.

I don't know what I was wearing.

Terribly Chelsea, I thought I was.

Really, I suppose I was

as square as an ice cube with it.

- Try that one over there.

- Right you are.

- Me, on the telly?

- It won't take a minute.

How fascinating.

You must tell me what to do.

Could you come this way?

I hate convention. You can't breathe.

You have to break away.

But isn't the breakaway of yesterday

the convention of today?

Then you have to break away again.

Just for the sake of it?

Isn't that conventional?

The way young people live today...

the way they dress, dance, talk...

It's more conventional

than what they're trying to escape.

Would you say

the way I dress was conventional?

Your dress is in the height of fashion,

and your hair is...

She's fine. We'll use that. Very good.

How conventional are we

in matters of public taste?

The London skyline is constantly altering,

and yet young architects...

Thank you for letting me see

the finished product.

- It's a very good program.

- You really think so?

I thought I looked ghastly,

but it was a super program.

I thought you looked super,

and the program looked ghastly.

What's more, I'm right, too.

No, I thought you looked

frightfully lean and intelligent.

I am frightfully lean and intelligent,

not that it helps.

- You must lead such an interesting life.

- Being a professional question mark?

- It's better than being a professional bosom.

- What's that?

You should try posing for Brides sometime.

I did once. It was a disaster.

A complete disaster.

Is this yours?

Yes, as a matter of fact, it is.

This one.

What do you think I am? Go on, get in.

There's so much junk in it,

though I keep on chucking things out.

- Have an icy drop.

- I'd love one. Thank you.

- One, two...

- Thank you.

Oh, dear.

We just sort of began to meet.

He had tickets for this,

or he thought I might be interested in that.

It was really mostly mental, to start with.

There was nothing deliberate about it.

We didn't know what we were doing at all.

- You're a thoroughly rotten shot.

- Thoroughly rotten target.

You couldn't miss a dickey bird.

Buried treasure.

Heads, we do. Tails, we don't.

We do.

How I'd love to live here.

- We'd have to do an awful lot to it.

- We'd have to do everything to it.

Yes, you're right.

Do you know these cottages

are being carefully rehabilitated?

At great expense.

And will emerge as unique

cottage-type homes of distinction.

- Do you want to live in such a home?

- I wouldn't mind.

With a yellow front door

and a carriage lantern?

- Absolutely lovely.

- Ghastly! I really do believe...

I do.

- You are a fantastic girl.

- Why?

I don't know. You just are.

It should be so easy to be happy,

shouldn't it?

- Should be the easiest thing in the world.

- Should be.

I wonder why it isn't.

Maybe it is.

Is it all right for Wednesday?

It's all right for Wednesday.

I hate this furtiveness. It's so corny.

- It's so embarrassing.

- What do you want to do, then?

I don't know.

I do know.

I don't know.

I know.

Wife.

Husband.

Come on, darling.

It's so boring.

Come on, darling. You started it.

It was your idea to learn the language

for our holiday.

Yes, and all we'd ever be able to say was,

"What a lovely view!"

I'm getting on with it.

All right, you get on with it.

Of course, I loved him dearly.

He was one of the nicest boys in the world.

It's just that

he was so desperately immature.

Marriage had been sort of foisted on him,

poor lamb.

He just wasn't ready for the responsibility.

He tried nobly, but he hadn't really got

the faintest idea what it was all about.

Mr. Southgate, you have the reputation

of being something of a lone wolf.

Is this a protest against the establishment?

It's true I have always preferred...

to be a mouse that walked by itself...

rather than a member of a group

of literary lions...

always licking each other,

washing each other behind the ears...

and biting each other.

And, as you know,

they're behind bars in a cultural zoo.

- They won't let you print that?

- Yes, they will, if I fight.

- And will you fight?

- He fights.

Something else.

Now that you've moved down here

into the country, into virtual isolation...

Robert had marvelous tact,

incredible maturity, sensitivity.

He had got this funny old bloke

spouting his head off.

Fascinating. I'd never met anyone

like old Southgate.

Suddenly one felt madly in, you know.

I mean, to think...

this is the one of the great writers

of the century, and here I am.

It was extraordinary.

I don't really remember much anyone said.

But that wasn't really the thing.

The thing was they accepted me.

- I'm just dying to read your books.

- They're mostly out of print.

- Do you mind if I help myself?

- Please do.

Thank you.

- It's been fabulous meeting you.

- You a truth-teller?

- Yes, I think so.

- Is she?

- I know she is with me.

- You consider yourself a very lucky man.

Yes, I do.

Gosh, that's marvelous.

I'm glad you like it. I'd rather have done it...

than written half my stories.

Probably only took him half an hour.

I should like you to have it. Both of you.

- We couldn't possibly. Absolutely not.

- Please.

- It's yours. It belongs to you.

- I'm 78 years old, more or less.

Besides, I'd much rather you left this place

with this under your arm...

than that recording of antique birdsong.

Thank you.

Just one moment, please.

I have a call for you.

Go ahead, lpswich.

Estelle.

- How are the children?

- Fine.

I shall have to stay the night.

I'm staying with him, actually.

- All right.

- Say I'm sorry. Give them my love, will you?

And tell them I'll see them tomorrow.

Bye.

Okay, your go now.

If I can get some money out...

- Euston, 4614.

- Go ahead, Southampton.

Tony? Hello, love. I'm still in Southampton.

What a bore.

I know, darling.

It's just as much a bore for me.

Okay, see you tomorrow. Bye-bye, darling.

Thank you, sir.

Wait till we get these on.

Funny pair, that Mr. And Mrs. Gold in 409.

I suppose you've done this sort of thing...

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