Darling Companion Page #6

like you're having a heart attack.

- Let me talk to Beth.

- Hold on.

- Beth.

- What?

- Penny, for you.

- Okay.

- Hi, Penny.

- He sounds terrible.

No matter what you're feeling,

don't kill him.

Where are you, anyway?

I'm underneath the gondola.

Carmen had a vision

about porta-potties and took off.

I think she's coming back.

Don't worry,

I'll check in with you in an hour.

Don't drink that so fast.

That's drinking too much.

God, really.

Careful.

I love this.

We're on the job, like those cop partners.

I'm the grizzled old guy,

and you're the young kid

who thinks he knows everything.

You mean the one the older one resents

cause the younger one's actually smarter?

Yeah, until you save my life.

You know, Carmen said there was...

The house was either yellow or green.

I don't know. Maybe she's confused.

Yeah, maybe she's really a Gypsy.

You think she's faking?

Beautiful women get away with a lot of sh*t.

Hello?

Carmen?

I am not sure about the color of the house.

I'm getting mixed messages.

Something about blue.

Blue, okay.

Don't lose faith.

Hello? Carmen?

- What?

- She's getting mixed messages,

something about blue.

Okay.

God, maybe we should have just taken...

I don't know, the other trail.

- The one that went up? No, no, no.

- No, because...

If we'd done that,

we'd be sleeping out here tonight.

No, we've got to get down.

But we don't know where we are,

so maybe we should backtrack or...

I don't know.

No, no, no, no, no.

Dear, we've been out here

for about five hours.

- Yeah.

- It'll take at least that long

to get back by backtracking.

- How do you know?

- It's almost 4:
00 now. it's gonna be dark

- in a couple of hours...

- I know it's gonna be dark,

but how do you know this is going down

and not just deeper into the woods?

- We're following the creek.

- I think we should call someone.

Creeks always run downhill.

I think we should call someone.

What? And say what?

- And say that we're lost.

- We're not lost.

- Oh, God.

- Honey, look, look.

- See over there?

- What? Yeah.

There. That's Mount Wilson.

Yeah, which means what?

You can see Mount Wilson from Utah.

Oh, sh*t.

My battery is way down.

Please, come on, come on.

- What are you gonna say?

- Well, I'm just gonna tell them

that if they haven't

heard from us in an hour,

they should call Search and Rescue.

That's embarrassing. You're panicking.

- Penny!

- Hi.

Penny, oh, God. Thank God.

No, I'm so happy.

Listen, I just didn't think

this phone was gonna work.

- Where are you guys?

- I don't know. I think we're lost.

Listen, if you don't hear

from us in an hour...

Penny?

Penny? Oh, shoot!

Beth?

Beth?

Lost...

The phone is dead, honey.

Can you please turn yours on, quick?

Shoot.

Damn. It's already on.

I forgot to turn it off.

- Yeah?

- Joseph, what happened?

Penny, listen, listen,

I've got to talk fast.

There's no reason to panic,

but we got Mount Wilson on our left,

and we started out from Bear Creek,

so that means that right now,

we are somewhere between those two...

Penny?

Joseph?

Joseph!

Sh*t, sh*t,

sh*t!

You're panicking.

What made her call right then,

right when we were talking about her?

Gypsy sh*t.

It's weird.

Hi. How are you?

Did Hector send you guys?

No, no, we lost our dog.

And we heard you might

have seen him, you know?

Blue, behave. Blue.

I seen this poster,

but I don't recall seeing Freeway his self.

Let me think. You know what?

Ever heard of Christus Bonheur?

No, ma'am.

Your dad's a charmer. Watch and learn.

Yes, ma'am.

I could tell you two was father and son

right away.

You're so much alike.

- Christus...

- Christus Bonheur,

a stone-cold psycho, if you want to know.

That degenerate's always got a bunch

of loose dogs hanging around.

Seen him in town the other day,

which is unusual.

Now, where could we find him, ma'am?

He's got a filthy shack halfway to nowhere.

You know where you turn off

North Fork to Rattlesnake Trail?

Up behind 17 Heifers?

Much obliged, ma'am.

Blue.

All right, thank you, ma'am.

Hey, if you hit Squirrel Head,

you gone too far.

Okay.

All right.

You know how to lay on the charm, Russell.

I just all of a sudden had a

Southern accent.

Did you ever hear of floaters?

Yeah, in your eye?

I never heard of them till last week.

Now I got 'em for the rest of my life.

It's no big deal. Older people get them.

It's fine. Your brain will adjust.

You won't even notice them.

You know, I'm not sure

this is such a good idea.

You think maybe we should

get a deputy or something?

No, we're just gonna go up there

and talk to old Christus, man-to-man.

You mean, stone-cold-psycho-to-man?

Well, my experience...

And I've been around quite a bit, Bryan...

Is that most people don't want trouble.

In fact, old Christus will probably be happy

to have some company.

Maybe.

My father left us for one of his students,

never lifted a finger for Penny or me.

And the guy is an ethics professor.

Hadn't been for Joseph,

I couldn't have gone to medical school.

I bet you wish

your mom was dating a millionaire, huh?

Not a millionaire, Russell, okay?

Just someone who's making a living.

I mean, Mom worked hard

for that buyout money.

She shouldn't have to support you with it.

What happens if the Pigeon and the Truck

doesn't make any money, huh?

Do you actually know anyone

who likes warm beer?

It'll all work out. I'll Always.

No, it doesn't!

I love your mother,

and I'm gonna take care of her.

And I've been working since I was 15

so I can always find a job.

And the pub is gonna do just great,

but you shouldn't feel

any pressure to buy in.

Well, I don't.

Yeah, well, I think everybody who invests

is gonna make a lot of money.

Why? Why? 'Cause anything's possible?

That's my motto. Anything's possible.

Snake!

He's leaving. Don't piss him off.

You got to relax.

We've got no flashlight.

We've got no clothes. We've got nothing.

It was hot and sunny when we left.

You said we were only gonna be gone

a couple of hours...

Right, it's my fault.

Look, we both screwed up, okay?

Why can't you ever admit

you've made a mistake?

No, I guess it's genetically impossible,

given your father.

- I'm not like him.

- Well, then name one mistake you've made.

Besides coming out here with you?

I don't think in terms of mistakes.

I take responsibility for everything.

That's what doctors do.

That's right. I forgot. You're a doctor.

You hadn't mentioned

it in the last eight minutes.

Here we go. "Doctors think they're gods

"Doctors are self-absorbed egomaniacs. "

- And full of sh*t.

- Doctors are full of sh*t?

No, I am not talking about doctors.

I am talking about you.

Have I ever put my work

before you or the girls?

Okay, sometimes.

When I'm doing surgery on someone's spine

to relieve them of a life of pain,

I have put my work first.

The girls always understood,

and they never complained.

Were we living in the same house?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes