Dead Mary Page #2

-He's a bit insane.

-That was not... That wasn't me.

-That was so you. That was hilarious.

-Sure.

-Where the hell is Ted anyway?

Sorry, I thought it was you, man.

Qh, look, she's going out to play.

Be nice.

You didn't have to try to make small talk

with her for three hours

waiting for someone else to get here.

She just doesn't know anyone.

Anyone her own age anyway.

-Where did he meet her?

-Babysitting.

Hey, weren't you supposed to be

bringing some new guy up this weekend?

-Yeah, Eve, what happened with that?

-Same thing that always happens.

Qh! His wife wouldn't let him.

No. This guy wasn't married, he wasn't

cheating with me on someone else.

I don't know, maybe that was the problem.

You know, just with all of them,

I get to that point

where things just seem broken and I just

don't have the energy anymore to fix it.

-Can you change this song?

-Why, you don't like it?

No.

Qh, that's new.

I thought you were all anti-tattoo,

anti-piercing, anti-scarification.

No, no, I never said that.

-Qh, yes, you did.

-No!

-Really?

-Yes, you did.

Well, if I did, I don't remember it.

Anyway, Dash and I both got these.

We did it instead of renewing our vows.

-His idea?

-Yes, it was his gift to me.

Amber, did you know

when he was cheating on you?

Well, in my case, Kim, it was a little obvious.

-No, I mean, I wasn't talking about...

-Walking in on him?

Qkay, you know what?

I don't want to talk about this.

Qkay? I mean, it was...

It was a one-time thing,

and he's not like that anymore.

-So, things are good?

-Well, they're better.

You're lucky.

-You look like you could use one.

-Yeah. Thanks, Eve.

-It's good to see you.

-Yeah, you, too.

-So?

-So-so.

-You look good.

-So do you.

I like your hair.

Yeah? I don't know. I'm growing it.

I'm still not sure if I like it.

-So, you guys gonna try and work it out?

-Why'd I know you were gonna say that?

Because I'm obviously terribly predictable.

I knew you were gonna say that.

I don't know. You know?

What do you want me to say? We'll see.

Why, what'd she say?

Hey, see that?

-What's that?

-I got them for you. They're veggie burgers.

-Qh, sweetie, I eat meat now.

-What? Since when?

These things make you sickly.

How was your nap?

It's freezing.

Trying to call your girlfriend?

Trying to get a hold of Ted.

It keeps saying, ''Call was lost.''

-Think he got the dates wrong?

-I doubt it. The weekend was his idea.

We are talking about the same Ted here,

aren't we?

Yeah.

Whatever, it's not like

we're locked out or anything.

So, what are we gonna do?

We're just gonna eat?

We're not gonna wait for him?

Why don't you try the reception

out by the road?

Qh, forget it. It's his problem.

Did you try holding your golf club

up over your head?

''Did you try holding your golf club...''

-Hey, Lily. You hungry?

-Yeah, kind of.

We were just starting to wonder

where you'd gone.

I was just walking.

The woods are really beautiful.

-You want a drink?

-I'm good, thanks.

-Drugs?

-No.

You're bleeding.

Yeah, I fell.

Do you guys know where Bryce is?

You wanna maybe put something on that.

Qh, I'm okay. I'm just gonna

put some water on it. Is he inside or...

-He's in there somewhere.

-Qkay, thanks.

Maybe she's rabid.

Rabid.

So? How you getting along with everybody?

Yeah.

Yeah? What do you mean, ''Yeah''?

Yeah. I mean, they all seem nice.

You say that like they don't all seem nice.

I just think it would be better and more fun

to be able to hang out with everyone

when, you know, they're sober

and maybe not in a group.

That would, of course,

negate the whole idea of the weekend, but...

So, how's work?

-They wanna promote me.

-Matt, that's great.

Yeah, is it? Growing with the company

and all that crap?

Yeah, you sound really excited.

More hours, more responsibility, same pay.

Are you still writing?

No. I'm up at 6:
00. I'm home at 7:00.

I mean, who has energy

to do anything else?

Exactly.

What's that supposed to mean?

Nothing. Just that.

I know just what you're talking about.

Qkay, well, it sounds like

there's something else there.

-Oh, really? Well, what does it sound like?

-No, man, I'm exactly the same way.

You know, I come home from work,

watch T.V., eat and pass out.

You know, you rinse and repeat.

Dash, that's not true.

We do stuff on the weekends.

I'm taking a class.

Qh, I'm hardly ever home,

unless I'm sleeping.

It's too depressing.

So, is this what you expected?

Damn, Matt, I don't know, man.

Like, what did you expect it to feel like?

I don't know.

Qlder.

Like, adult?

Yeah, I guess.

Hey, I pay adult taxes.

Would you grow up?

What did you expect? To chase teenagers

around campus bars your entire life?

-Poor, poor Baker.

-Eve, don't start.

I guess now you got your chance, huh?

Hit up a few last calls.

Yeah.

Happy New Year!

I'm sorry, honey. It's not usually like this.

Like, it's usually so much more fun.

I mean, how was I supposed to know

they were gonna break up?

-Like, how was I supposed to know?

-Bryce, you think that's the big problem?

-Come on, let's go.

-Where?

Down to the point. I found this great place.

We can go for a swim. It'll be fun.

Honey, why didn't you wanna go earlier

with the girls?

Well, now you and I can be alone.

-We are alone.

-More alone.

-I'm scared of the fish.

-You're a baby.

-Please?

-I just feel...

I feel like I should be with these guys.

I mean, it's the only weekend.

I never see them.

ls it just gonna be a bunch of stories

about funny things

that happened to people you used to know,

I'm never gonna meet?

Yes. Probably. Definitely.

Yeah.

I promise it will not be lame, okay?

-Little bit. A little lame. All right, let's go.

-Maybe.

Come on.

Qkay, Amber. Truth.

What's the weirdest thing

that's ever happened to you?

The weirdest thing? Qh, man, I don't know.

Nothing weird ever happens to me.

Qkay, I guess...

I think I saw a UFQ this one time.

Someone else go.

How about the Hag Syndrome?

You know that thing when you wake up

in the middle of the night

and you can't move,

and you get this pressing down

on your chest,

and you feel like something's

in a room with you?

Yes, I've totally had that.

It scares the crap out of me.

ls that what that is?

When you feel all numb and cold?

So, what do they call it

the Hag Syndrome for?

Because they used to say it's like a hag's

crawled on top of you, holding you down.

Yeah, I've had that,

and you, like, want to scream but you can't.

And there's, like,

all these voices in your head,

and there's, like, wind

and it feels like you're in a tunnel.

Well, I felt something pulling me

down the bed, it wasn't the hag.

It's just sleep paralysis.

Yeah, your brain's awake, but your body's

still asleep and you're dreaming.

That's all it is. I've had it happen.

You know what I think?

When that happens,

your soul leaves your body.

That's what I think.

-It was probably just squirrels.

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