Dean Page #2

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at least numerically,

and completely house trained.

- Oh.

- That's great.

It's like my nephew.

My sister's got him

on one of those leashes,

which I'm sure

is not gonna add

to any weird issues later on.

Oh, yeah.

But he's really good

at chasing balls.

- Does he live nearby?

- Uh...

- Your son?

- No, uh, yeah, he's in Brooklyn now.

No, but I work in the city, so I see

him whenever he needs something.

- So you live here alone?

- Yes, uh, since my wife died.

It's just me.

- Oh, I'm sorry, Robert.

- No, no, it's okay.

I've got a terrific therapist.

I'm reading all the books

you're supposed to read, so...

- Yeah, there you go.

- Let me just, uh, show you the kitchen.

Uh, hold my calls.

This way.

Man, I haven't seen you

in a long time.

Yeah, I got to fly all the way to

Brett's wedding to see my friend?

- What the hell is that?

- I know.

You have got to be the oldest ring

bearer I've ever seen in my life.

Yeah, I'm not the ring bearer.

I'm the best man, but...

Sorry you didn't make

the cut, buddy.

I'm pretty sure Kevin

was the best man, right?

Yeah, he's one of them.

There are two of us,

so it was kind of a tie.

- Oh, okay.

- Yeah.

So you were

the second-best man?

- Okay.

- No, I'm best-also.

Brett has two best men.

We're both his best men.

It just looked like

Kevin was standing

- closer to Brett...

- Okay, dude, listen.

- We're both...

- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

- Joking around, just a bit.

- Oh, okay.

- Thank you.

- Thanks, man.

- You do bits now, huh?

- Yeah.

Is that what they do in Hollywood?

They do bits?

Well, I don't live in Hollywood.

I live in echo park.

Echo park?

That sounds very empty.

You don't know

what you're missing, man.

There are so many hot women,

and a lot of them are desperate,

which is really nice.

- You should come visit.

- Yeah, I don't know.

Actually,

this ad agency out there,

they wanna use my illustrations

in one of their campaigns.

And they were like,

"hey, we'll fly you out,

and you can do some concepting

with our creatives."

- But I can't do it.

- That... what, are you too busy?

I just... I can't bring myself

to work with people

who call themselves

"creatives."

Oh, you're a creative?

Ah, you must be very creative.

I can tell by the name

you gave yourself.

It's very creative.

Hey, guys, photo, come on.

Oh, yeah.

Here we go.

Come on, get in here.

All right.

Just the roommates.

Ready?

Oh, and Kevin.

Kev!

- Get in here, man.

- No, come on, let's grab one.

Let's grab one.

Let's grab one.

- Come on.

- Yeah.

- We got it. We got it.

- K-dog, get in here.

- Come on, come on, come on.

- Ready? Ready?

- One, two, three.

- Love these things.

- That's awesome.

- Hi, guys.

- Michelle, hey.

- Hey, how are you?

- Hi, good to see you.

- Good to see you.

- You look so handsome.

- Thank you.

- You all do.

- Thank you.

- Hi.

Hey. Hey.

How you holding up?

- He's good, right?

- Yeah, I'm good, yeah.

Michelle I'm more worried about.

Whew.

She is beautiful.

- Until one of them gets fat.

And that is how my boy Brett

bagged that hottie you see

right next to him right now.

They're one cute ass couple,

huh? No homo.

No homo.

Dad, you know what

I'm talking about.

Seriously, though, man...

You're my best bud.

We're one the same.

Mano a mano.

To Brett and Wendy.

May you have a long

and happy marriage

and an even longer

and happier life.

Aww.

Ladies and gentlemen,

your second-best man,

- aka the ring dropper.

- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa.

- Oh, excuse me.

- Excuse me.

Okay, okay, hello, test.

Thank you, Kevin, for that...

That heartfelt,

uh, toast-slash-rap,

I guess that was?

- Whatever you were doing.

- Ha-ha!

By the way, I'm... if anybody's

the actual best man tonight,

you know, it's me.

I've been friends with Brett

for a long time.

We go way back.

We were roommates in college.

He's my best friend.

Um, he actually

met his wife, Wendy,

through me and my ex,

who's here tonight, Michelle.

She's brought her friend.

Hey, man, cheers.

Uh, which I'm totally fine with.

Good-good

seeing you guys.

Anyways, the point is

it's not a competition.

We're all here to have fun.

Just wanted to clear the air

a little bit, um...

Jesus Christ.

- Are we okay?

- Are we? I don't know.

You did your thing,

whatever that was, and...

- Oh, yeah.

- I'm gonna try to say something

- actually from the heart here.

- Wrap it up.

Yeah, wrap it up.

Is that with a "w" or an "r"?

What'd you just say?

It's a play on words.

There's homonyms or homophones.

- You just call me a homophobe?

- Hold on, hold on.

Hey, Kev.

- Hey, you got a problem?

- Come on.

- Right now!

- You want to go with me?

- Come on, guys.

You want to go with me?

You know what? Forget it.

Forget it. Forget it.

I'm good.

I'm fine.

Come on, it's a party.

Let's... let's have a good time.

- Hey, dad.

- I can't believe you picked up.

- Yeah, what's going on?

- Listen, we need to get rid

of some things to make

the house more... sellable.

So I need you to come up

and clear out some

of your stuff from your room.

Wait, what are you

talking about?

I've been asking you to clear

that stuff out for years.

You know, your stuff.

All your...

Detritus.

I think we should

just talk about

what we're gonna

do with the house.

We haven't made a decision yet.

Right?

We have to decide together.

- How's Friday?

- What, to decide?

- Mm-hmm.

- Oh, yeah,

I can't do Friday.

- Why?

- Well, because I'm swamped with my book.

In fact, I was just

working on it now.

I'm really busy.

Okay, no, no. No, no.

We'll just leave it like this,

and then you'll be happy

to know it will never be sold.

Dad, come on.

That's not what I'm saying.

I'm saying let's...

Talk about it

and make a decision together.

All right, how about Saturday?

Yeah, Saturday's bad, too.

I'm not available.

Okay, well, what are you doing,

if you don't mind my asking?

Um, I'm, uh...

I'm, uh...

I'm going away, actually.

I'm going to California...

To meet with some creatives.

Yup, it's all good.

It's all good.

All right, see you.

Yes, I love it. Love you.

Love it. All right.

Peace.

Sorry about that.

Just making money.

- There he is.

- What up?

This is Chad.

He's our co-creative director.

What's up, brother?

How are you?

How you doing?

You want some almond water, bro?

- Uh, no, I'm allergic.

- You're allergic to water?

No, to almonds.

Huh, nuts.

Yeah.

Okay, so I don't know how much

you know about appar@us.

Uh, a little bit.

I checked out your website.

Appar@us is a creative company,

and what we're doing is building

- a digital audience, okay?

- Yeah.

- Basically, we sprinkle our

- love of good storytelling...

into brand management,

brand entertainment,

loyalty branding,

and what we're doing is

- building a digital audience.

We've won awards from Cannes,

one show, best show.

We won a couple Clios,

Omma awards, Webbys,

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