Death Defying Acts Page #2

It's such an honour to

have you with us...

Hey!

Be careful with that trunk,

you schmuck!

Sorry, sir!

Mr. Houdini's very tired

after his journey.

I'll deal with it, boss.

Come on! Quick as you can!

Quick as you can!

There! Carefully...

A dollar!

Thank you, sir!

Thank Mr. Houdini!

Harry! Are you all right?

Harry!

Are you all right?

I think I can wipe my own arse,

Mr. Sugarman, thank you!

It's OK, Morry.

Nothin' to worry about.

The golden goose is still laying.

'Houdini's Mother Dies... '

'Houdini in Mourning.'

'Houdini Finds

Hope in Spiritualism.'

'Lt's a fake, says Houdini.'

A very private man...

'My greatest ambition is to live

and die being worthy of

the mother who bore me.'

Another bereavement,

Mrs. McGarvie?

I'm always happy for you to...

probe the higher shelves for

those 'cherishable details'.

I already have all

the details I need.

Listen to this...

'Madame Clare De Lune,

Psychic Extraordinaire... '

'... respectfully accepts

Mr. Houdini's Psychic challenge'.

Clare de who?

Clare de Lune,

it's French, goddamn it.

Get yourself an education,

Sugarman.

What do you think?

Do I look like a fruit?

Like a fruit?

You look beautiful, Harry.

I look like a fruit.

They've got class.

I like 'em.

If you wanna look like a fruit,

Morry, you wear 'em!

And as well you know,

I've got an education -

in Law and in Business Management.

I've got a Diploma.

I bought it in

your glorious country.

Harry, everyone's a fake.

As soon as you scratch the gold-leaf,

all of these so-called

psychics are just made of lead.

It's all hocus pocus,

mumbo jumbo.

- So?

- So why waste our time?

I don't want to be remembered

for a bunch of dumb stunts.

For once, this ain't about chains

and friggin' padlocks.

It's about science.

It's about proof!

You've been pushing yourself

too hard, Harry...

Oh, get off me!

See this?

This is from

the Scientific American.

The Scientific American!

And my psychic experiment

is science!

Showbiz is Showbiz, Harry.

It's not about science...

It's about nickels and dimes.

Nickels and dimes.

Yeah, well, you look after

the nickels and dimes

and I'll look after the science.

Mistress of the Skies -

that was my mam.

Madam...

She could just pluck

a character off a shelf

and act as swish as

the best of them...

...and just about manage

to convince herself.

We've got two hours

to check the tank.

The boys'll be set

by the time we get there.

Curtain's at 8:
00...

How's Security?

Like Mrs. Clam with a headache.

'I am with you, my Harry,

even in dreams.'

'Your little darling wife, Bess'.

'Little darling wife'.

Excuse me!

He's mine!

I do Mr. Houdini.

Who do you think you are?

Who do I think I am?

I'm the one who does all

the bloody work around here!

You little thief!

- I was just looking!

- Yeah, sure you were!

That's our audience you're

kickin' in the pants there,

Mr. Sugarman...

I'm sure she's OK.

You can let her go.

What's your name, kid?

Lost your voice, huh?

When did you last hear it?

Oh, wait, I know...

Help! Help!

I'm in here!

I'm in here!

I'm in here!

C'mon! Open up!

Open up! Open up!

Open up!

How's that for size?

Want a sandwich?

Yes please, Mr. Houdini!

The voice fits!

A little gummed up still,

but it works.

What else can you say?

Name's Benji, Mr. Houdini.

'Benji Mr. Houdini'.

Well, I'd drop the second part;

it's already spoken for.

Just plain Benji

sounds good to me.

'Just Plain Benji'

isn't much of a name either.

Well, we have a comedienne here,

Mr. Sugarman.

Maybe she can do the warm-up.

I'm not a comedienne,

Mr. Houdini.

No?

So what do you do for a living?

Rob banks? Train fleas?

Dance the Highland Fling?

And steal from

dressing rooms?

I'm a psychic...

Well, more a sort of disciple...

Oh, a psychic's sidekick, huh?

'The Tantalising Princess Kali

and her Dusky Disciple'

That's you, huh?

We were top of the bill

at McTavish's Palace!

Top of the bill

at The Palace, eh?

Well, I think I have a little

something for you too.

Tonight's performance.

Don't be late!

Thanks, Mr. Houdini!

My mam doesny do tricks, like.

It's real, Mr. Houdini.

It's no jiggery-pokery.

Solid gold. I'm sure

she's great, kid. Goodbye.

- She's got 'The Gift'.

- 'Bye, 'bye, now.

Fellow travellers.

Dear friends.

Modern Science tells us

that Life...

...had its beginnings in the gloomy

depths of the great oceans.

Our own little lives are

but a brief gasp...

...before we plunge back down into

that dreamy darkness

from which there is no return...

Or is there?

I, Harry Houdini, shall discover

the Truth for all of us!

Naked we emerged from

that sea of the unconscious...

...and that is how I now

propose to travel.

Lights, please!

Ladies and gentlemen...

I entreat you; do not attempt to hold

your breath in emulation of me...

May God guide me...

...and have mercy

on my immortal soul.

Mama...

Mama!

Harry!

Get him out!!

Bravo! Bravo!

Nearly two minutes over!

Then that's two minutes you

didn't know about, Morry.

You don't have to do this, Harry.

You don't have to push yourself

to the wire every time...

Yes I do!

I met Houdini!

I met Houdini!

I met him, ma!

He's got these eyes thatjust burn

through to the back of your head!

He's incredible, ma!

You got caught!

What did I tell you?

Rule number one:

Never get caught!

So what did you find out?

Or were you too busy

making eyes at him?

Do you think

I like livin' like this?

Surrounded by grime and filth

and other people's hand-me-downs?!

I want new things.

Nice things.

I want $10,000!

Did you find out anything, mam?

There wasn't a single personal

thing in his hotel suite.

Like he doesn't exist...

He has a fancy trunk

with his initials on...

The kind of trunk you

keep your secrets in.

A big trunk

that only takes a tiny wee key.

Now where would Mr. Houdini

keep a key like that, eh?

And this...

His mother.

It's a start.

I'll busk the rest.

Eat your tea now.

Next!

Good afternoon, Mr. Houdini.

I have, sir, a secret message.

It's from your mother.

It's in Hungarian,

isn't it, Jock?

You should have done

your homework, Hamish!

She didn't speak Hungarian -

she spoke German.

Next!

You're a hoofer.

Aye, sir! A hoofer, I am!

We're interviewing psychics.

Think of a number...

Message from your mama...

Very cold, very cold.

Message Little Harry,

growing old, growing old.

Arky, parky, tory roop.

Rang tang, toozy Jock.

Eerie, orie! Eerie, orie!

You are oot!

Macbeth. Act 1. Scene 1.

Right?

Alright, thank you very much

young ladies.

We'll let your mother know.

Out you go. Thank you now.

Very good.

She'll never forgive you,

Harry.

- Out you go.

- What did you say?

Forgive me for what?

I never hurt her

in my goddamn life!

What the hell's she

talking about, Sugarman?

10,000 American dollars.

That's what she was

talking about, Harry.

If God ever permitted an angel

to walk this earth,

it was my mother!

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