Deception

Sorry for scaring you.

I was just heading home.

- We met before in the can.

- Oh, you're Wyatt, right?

Yeah. So, you working late or...

you downloading a

multitude of porn.

I have to be out of

here by tomorrow...

so I'm just trying

to finish up.

- What about you?

You kidding? This

is an early night.

Hard to believe

once upon a time...

it was a measure of

a man's success...

on how little he worked.

What's the deal? Our

firm hires you...

to bless our books

they send you?

I'm the audit manager,

yeah. I handle...

the same 7 or 8

clients every year.

I must've done Stern...

for something

like 4 years now.

- Wow. So you like this work?

I do. The order of

it appeals to me.

The symmetry.

It's alright, I guess,

if you like workin'

with numbers.

Do you like being a lawyer?

It's alright, I guess,

if you like workin'

with a**holes.

- I'm probably

disturbing you, so...

Hey, no, it's alright.

I'm almost done.

- Really.

- Oh.

So...

Worth and Berman, huh?

Did they headhunt you?

Yeah. My senior

year of college.

They subsidized my

graduate degree.

Ah, I see.

So you were poor, right?

I guess I was kind of poor.

I was brought up by

my mom on her own...

and she died when I was 19...

so it was kind of

like a lifeline.

- Wow. Sounds like

you needed it.

I'm sure there's

a lot of people...

- that had it worse.

- Not here.

Practically every suit I know

is Harvard by way of Andover.

- Are you?

- Oh, hell no. No, no.

- I'm Princeton

by way of Exeter.

But that's like

the same. Oh yeah.

So, Jonathan...

I think I have something here

which might help you to focus.

- You smoke?

- Not for a long time.

Good. This'll give

you a real buzz,

then.

I don't know...

I just sometimes

feel so, uh...

you know... removed.

I work for one of the biggest...

accounting firms

in the world...

and there's not so much

as a desk there...

to prove it. My new

senior manager...

I haven't even met

him in person yet.

I try and meet people at work

but it's always the same.

To the accounting staff

I'm a pain because...

for 2 weeks they must

hold their breath.

They hope I don't pick up

any of their screw-ups.

To everyone else I'm just

a temporary fixed...

so I bother them.

Sometimes...

I sit and I look

through the glass,

and I see life..

- literally passing me by.

- Jonathan.

Yeah?

By the clock on that

wall you have been...

talking for 37

minutes straight.

I don't remember

a word I said.

So, God says to Jesus...

I haven't felt this good

since I saw Van Halen in '97.

Stand clear of the

closing doors, please.

- Is this the train

to Canal Street?

Yes, this is the right train.

So, I guess that's it.

This is my report

for Mr. Cross.

Could you point me towards

Wyatt Bose's office, please?

- Who?

Wyatt Bose. He's

one of your...

Hey, quit looking

down Daphne's shirt.

So, get in, get out,

huh? So where's next?

Clancey Funds on Friday...

and then Clute-Nichols

after that.

Sounds like fun.

Wait up a sec.

- Good to meet you, Jonathan.

- You, too.

So... wait.

You have the day off tomorrow?

How's your backhand?

- I'm sorry.

- Good game.

Commiserations, McQuarry.

You develop a killer instinct,

you'll beat the

crap out of me.

When these things

first came out.

I think I was a frosh

at boarding school.

Geez, where did

you get this thing?

You steal it from

Jimmy Connors?

- What is this?

Natural gut, hm?

No, natural gut and Kevlar.

I should have 'em replaced.

They're pretty frayed.

Those two girls

were so pretty.

You don't get much, do you?

- Do you mean sex?

- No, flood insurance.

How many women have

you slept with?

Of course you know.

Everyone knows.

- Maybe four.

- Maybe four?

Alright. Four. What about you?

- Me? I have no idea.

You just said everyone knows.

I meant everyone like you.

C'mon, hurry up.

Let's go for a drink.

You can borrow

something of mine.

Ah. Guten Abend, Herr Kleiner.

This way, Jonathan.

Like it?

It's a Gerhard

Richter. Actually.

Kleiner, the guy we

just saw downstairs.

He's a hotshot art dealer.

He hooked me up with this

fantastic gallery in Munich.

I'll be back in a second.

Try this one.

What?

C'mon, Jonathan.

You remind me of this

guy, Jamie Getz.

I met him my freshman

year at Princeton.

Oh, he was real smart.

He was witty, too,

when you loosened

him up. But he had...

It was bounday. Now you assume

that it was never scaled out.

The truth is he was

the only one guarding.

- What happened to him?

- Oh, he killed himself.

What?

You're kidding.

- Go get changed.

- Down here?

Down there.

Second door on the right.

Okay, Jonathan, so

just the four, huh?

Oh, come on.

Now, look...

I've never been

too adventuresome.

- What's the lamest?

- Well, I once...

- No, c'mon, share

it with the group.

I once phoned one

of those sex lines.

- Alright, now were talking.

- I talked to girl named Star.

I ended up explaining

a Section 179...

deduction on the new Escalade.

- You paid to give tax

advice on a sex line?

That's about the size of it.

Oh, thank you for

sharing, Jonathan.

That is pretty lame.

Oh, hello.

- Do you... is

she looking at me?

Yeah, she's looking at you.

- No, she's not. C'mon.

- Maybe it's the suit?

Listen, you don't think

women have the same urges?

Successful women working

their asses off...

to stay that way?

And?

Well, let's just

say there's a way...

that it can be taken care of.

You make it sound

like a mob hit.

- Had a good time tonight?

I had a really

good time tonight.

- I did. I had a great time.

Whoa. I wasn't

sure at one point.

No, I'm shy. But...

Thank you. And thanks

for the tennis...

and for takin' me out.

It's okay. Tennis anytime.

Particularly if you

play that badly.

At the corner, please.

The Waldorf Astoria.

I gotta go meet somebody.

- Take care. Have

a nice night.

I'll call you tomorrow.

Any problems,

you'll want to see

Julie Levinson.

She's our Assistant

Controller.

But, like I said,

I don't anticipate

any problems.

- Never had any before.

- Okay. Thanks.

It's really nice out here.

I usually just brown bag it.

You have to get outside.

Those fluorescent...

lights will kill you.

I read about them.

Hello.

Sh*t. No, I got

it here. Hold on.

See if you can change

it to the 6:
30...

out of JFK flight

#4. Right. Yeah.

Rutherford wants

me to join him...

in London ASAP.

- We're papering some

finance with Lloyds.

I tell you about this? - No.

- I'll be gone a couple weeks.

- Sounds sort of interesting.

Gonna be as boring

as sin, but...

Anyhow, I gotta get back.

- Ready?

- Alright.

That's disgusting.

I don't want to hear that.

Why?

That's repulsive.

Don't ever tell

anyone that. Ever.

You're the kind of

girl that pees...

in front of men, aren't you?

What goes in the Xerox Room

stays in the Xerox room.

Jonathan McQuarry, hello.

Hello?

Wyatt? I've got your

cell phone. I guess,

you've got mine. What

a pain in the ass.

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