Desert Blue Page #3

- At least they didn't evacuate us.

That'd mean we're okay.

They didn't evacuate us.

They quarantined us.

Probably because they don't want us...

to infect the rest of the county

with the biological agent.

- They never said it was biological.

- They didn't say it wasn't.

We're like guinea pigs.

They want to sit back and watch us.

They'll study us for years.

Dissecting our insides and putting us

in those jars of formaldehyde.

- When did you last want to leave town?

- Not the point.

- What is the point?

- That nobody ever said I couldn't.

As soon as somebody tells you you can't,

you want to. It's as simple as that.

There's nothing anybody can do until

they find out what killed that man.

So you might as well stop

your complaining...

and be grateful you're alive.

Want something to drink?

- Yes, please. Thanks.

- Tea, coffee, whiskey?

Tea. But boil the water first.

They're saying don't consume water

without boiling it.

It's tea.

I have to boil the water.

I know. I was just kidding.

It's not funny.

Come on, Billy. Let's go.

She's upset.

Don't worry.

- So, where's your daughter?

- She stayed at your house.

Planning her future.

Here. Hurry up. Take this.

I don't want to get busted.

See you at the aqueduct.

I'll meet you up there.

Holy sh*t!

You scared me.

- Sorry.

- It's all right.

- Lulu?

- You know Lulu?

Yeah. That song is from that movie,

To Sir With Love.

You know To Sir With Love?

We have a bunch of videos.

50 karate movies. The Star Wars Trilogy.

And we have To Sir With Love.

I love Lulu.

I would definitely play her

if they ever made a remake of that film.

- You act?

- Yeah.

That's cool.

Would I know you from anything?

I play Maggie on Maggie's World.

Oh, right. You don't have cable.

- If we had cable, would I know you?

- Probably.

- I was nominated for a Golden Globe.

- Golden Gloves?

Wow! That's great.

So you box, too?

It's globe.

It's an award given by

the foreign press.

That's cool.

- I've never met anyone from TV before.

- So what do you think?

- We're all poisoned?

- I don't know. I feel okay.

I think it's just procedure.

And their procedure's

screwing up my life.

- Yeah?

- Yes, I have an audition of a lifetime.

With Sterling Brock.

He did Going Nowhere Fast

and Oil Slick.

Anyway. I'm gonna miss

meeting with him tomorrow.

- Can't you reschedule?

- No. He wants to meet me tomorrow.

But if he wants to meet you,

then he'll meet you when you get back.

You don't understand.

So, what are you doing?

You boy cotting your dad?

He always takes us

on these little trips.

This year he takes me on this...

Americana road trip.

Roadside attractions.

He insists on stopping at

every no-name little sh*t town along...

- F***. I'm sorry.

- Don't worry about it.

Nobody ever comes to Baxter

for anything.

It's your home.

It sure is.

My dad wants to stop and see

the Jolly Green Giant statue next.

Oh, traitor!

You weren't joking.

You've got lots of albums.

Yeah. My dad was a big music lover.

But he hated television.

He always said that music doesn't force

itself on you the way television does.

Your mind is free to grow

and wander through...

whereas TV just sort of

brainwashes you.

- It does, huh?

- I don't know.

- Your show would be the exception.

- Where is this dad anyway?

He passed not too long ago.

I'm sorry about that.

No. Cookie?

- What's your name?

- Blue.

Your name is Blue.

No, it's not.

Yeah, it is.

Do you know what my name is?

What? Green?

No. Skye.

Kinda weird.

What do you do

around here for fun?

What is this?

Oh, no, she's gonna...

Hey! Chill out.

That's disgusting.

What are you doing?

Yuck!

You're disgusting.

You're disgusting.

Don't throw up.

I'm taking a piss.

This is Skye.

This is Cale, Ely and Haley.

Blue sky.

The code blue.

There you go.

- It's all right.

- She don't drink?

You can't be worried

about cooties now.

If you got contaminated,

it's over.

We got those shots.

That made them feel better. If we died,

they'd feel like they did something.

Is this like your guys' hangout?

You can call it that.

It's the movie star!

And action!

This is Pete. He's a pretty funny guy.

We're not sure how he got funny.

That's just how it is.

What's this thing?

- That's the aqueduct.

- It takes water to Los Angeles.

That's where you get your Evian!

- What makes you think I drink Evian?

- Bright lights, big city.

That'd be New York.

All right. Who's up, man?

Somebody drink a brew.

- I'm all right.

- That's right. I forgot.

You drink too much of this, then you

have to pee, and we all see you squat.

- Do you wipe also?

- Yes, I also wipe.

F***! Every time?

That sucks.

I'll take one.

The movie star has a nut sack.

Yeah.

- You should see me pee.

- I'd like that.

You can find yourself extra linens

in the cupboard by the bathroom.

Got it, thank you.

Thanks very much.

Yes.

- Blue, you ready to die, man?

- I hear it's a really bad death.

- Shut up. From who?

- Keeler.

He said first you get all hot,

start sweating profusely...

and everything gets real clear...

and tense, and then

you get really paranoid...

like all your worst fears

start coming true.

It's like the devil's inside of you

screaming, "I told you so!"

Then a billion worms hatch inside

your lungs and burrow out until you die.

- Where do you come up with this stuff?

- It's true.

They don't even know what it is.

They know, and it's bad.

I didn't want to have to do this.

What are you doing

throwing gunpowder in the fire?

It's not gunpowder. I boiled down some

Empire Cola sh*t. That was the residue.

- Holy sh*t.

- We're f***ed.

Just because it's flammable

doesn't mean it's lethal.

We could go anytime.

That's not funny.

That's not funny!

- Relax.

- F***ing dork.

Where did that giant ice cream cone

come from?

My dad built it

to attract people to the town.

It was a major mining town

when he was a kid.

When the gold ran out,

all the people left.

After he built the cone,

the other towns started copying him.

Now we have

the biggest of everything.

There's the world's

tallest thermometer...

the world's largest hubcap collection,

bottle cap collection...

even the largest ball of twine.

You name it,

they have it out here.

Hey, there.

Sorry. I was snooping.

It's okay.

I wouldn't put it out...

ifl didn't want people

to look at it.

Oh, thanks.

Did you see that one?

- That?

- Yeah.

I saw it, but I can't make

heads or tails of it.

It's a UFO.

- Really?

- Yeah. Look.

I took this three years ago

in the hills. You can't see the hills.

But there it is. My husband says that's

the government testing a new aircraft.

But he was not there

when I took it.

I have to admit something. I have read

everything your husband ever wrote.

Really. How he jump-started this town

back into existence with the big cone.

Then he started the ocean park.

He was a real trendsetter.

- You can't believe everything you read.

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