Destry Rides Again Page #6

What? Well, he may

have had his faults,

but at least

when he gambled, he won.

I'm sick of Callahan!

I'm sick of hearing his name!

Worse, I'm sick of wearing

his name!

All I want to do

is to be a cowboy

and wear my own pants.

Well, you won't get 'em.

Just sit there and gaze

on them features.

Let 'em be a lesson

and a guidin' star to ya.

[Door Slams]

Ai yi yi.

[Speaking Russian]

Here's your pants.

Please watch them

a little closer after this.

You watch your husband.

I'll watch my pants.

[Woman]

Mrs. Callahan!

Whoa! Ohh!

Mrs. Callahan! Aah!

[Gasp]

Oh, my land,

Mrs. Drewitt. You look

like you'd seen a ghost.

Sophie and Lem Claggett

are outside.

That no-good Kent has

put 'em out of their home.

Oh!

[Indistinct Chatter]

[Sophie]

We'd have been all right

if we'd kept on shootin'...

instead of sendin' for him!

They had the law

on their side!

The law!

I got something

to say about that.

It's none

of your affair.

Kent's got ahold of

every ranch in the valley...

and he wants to charge two bits

for every head of cattle.

All you men do

is talk,

and when the time comes,

you do what Kent says.

Lily Belle, maybe Destry

knows what he's a-doin'.

It's time the decent people

of this town got rid

of them hoodlums.

Start in with that

watery-eyed sheriff...

and that gun-shy,

lady-fingered deputy ofhis.

I heard what you just said,

Tyndall.

What are you gonna do about it?

The first thing

we'd better do...

is ask Mrs. Callahan

if she'll take care

of the Claggetts.

Don't turn your back

on me, you.

Jack, please.

I ain't one of your

weak-livered citizens...

and I ain't gonna pay

Kent's fancy prices.

Now what do you aim to do?

Nothin' at present.

That's what I thought.

I'll get somethin' done,

if I have to take the law

in my own hands!

Nobody's gonna set themselves up

above the law around here,

ya understand?

I got somethin'

to say to you.

Maybe I could

illustrate it better

if I told you a story.

I used to have a friend

that was an opry singer,

but he went into

the cement business.

One day,

he fell into the cement.

And now he's the cornerstone

of the post office

in St. Louis, Missouri.

He shoulda stuck

to his own trade.

You'd better stick to yours.

That fella Tyndall

is gonna make trouble,

sure as I'm standin' here.

What are we gonna do?

What do you say

we get ready for supper?

How can you talk of eatin'

at a time like this?

'Cause I'm hungry.

'Cause you're hungry.

I suppose I'm supposed

to stand he... Ohh!

Uh...

Well.

Believe it or not,

I'm waiting for

a stagecoach.

Uh-huh.

What are my pants

doing on your legs?

These are the legs

of a Stavrogin

of Bardicheff.

Let your pants

remain on them

and earn their gratitude.

Refuse and take their curse.

I think I'll take

both the curse and the pants.

Oh.

Well, take 'em off.

You mean, right now?

Yeah, right now.

The whole world's

against me.

Uh, wait a minute.

Might make a deal with you.

How well do you know

this country around here?

Oh! Like a field mouse.

I know every inch,

every pebble.

There isn't a twig, bird

or a tree that...

I'll give you the pants

if you do a job for me.

Agreed! What can I lose?

Only the job! Command me!

I want you to find something

for me.

I'm a weasel,

I'm a hawk.

I've got the memory

of an elephant.

I don't

need the whole menagerie.

All I need is

one human bloodhound

who can keep his mouth shut.

I'll be your bloodhound,

sniffing and silent.

What's missing?

The body of Sheriff Keogh.

Take back your pants.

What do you want to find

the body of Keogh for?

We can't prove a murder's

been done if we can't

produce a corpus delicti.

Corpus delicti.

I thought you were

lookin' for Keogh.

Boris is gonna make

a very good second deputy.

Sure! I might as well have

two loony deputies as one!

A deputy!

Deputy Stavrogin!

Observe my brain

in action!

Where would I go

if I were a dead body?

Would I stay out

in the open?

No. No privacy.

Wouldn't go in the river

if you can't swim.

Oh.

Why didn't I stay

in the gutter where

I was well-off?

That's right!

Would I go under the ground?

No, there's no future in it!

Miss Frenchy, honey,

you know that blue dress?

Mm-hmm.

Well, you can't

wear it no more.

It's got beer on it.

All right, you can have it,

if it fits you.

It does.

[Door Opens]

Now, Mr. Kent, if you're

mad at me about your...

Shut up!

Did you have any callers

at the house today?

Men, women or children?

Start acting smart

and I'll slap you around.

Did ya or didn't ya?

Who, for instance?

Destry, for instance.

Why not?

When I ask a question,

I like a direct answer.

What was the conversation?

All of it?

All of it.

Well, let me see.

I said hello.

No, he said hello.

Then I said,

won't you sit down,

and then he said...

What did he come for?

Get to that part quick!

Because he's a gentleman.

That's a lie.

I could prove it

to anybody but you.

Are you actin' smart?

He came to apologize.

Is that all?

That's all he had time for.

He was in a hurry to go.

Just like you are... now.

If I ever catch you

stackin' 'em on me,

I'll personally

put the lights out,

then I won't know you from

anyone else in the game.

My, my,

hejust ain't got...

no personality at all,

is he?

Where you goin', Miss Frenchy?

I'm going outside and see

what fresh air smells like.

[Piano Plays]

Watch close and follow

any of that gang

that comes out.

I don't get you.

All right, we can't find

the missing body, can we?

The next best thing is to have

the missing body find us.

Oh.

Keep your eyes open.

Oh, when I was a deputy,

I could think.

Now I'm sheriff,

I'm all fuddled.

You're fuddled, I'm fuddled,

he's fuddled.

Let's go home! Please!

Take your hands off of me

and do as you're told.

He knows what he's doin'.

[Frenchy]

Got a match?

Hello there. Sure.

What, have you been

throwin' things again?

How did you know?

I read a book once that said

women always look their best...

in the peace and quiet that

follows a storm of violence.

That's pretty good.

Would've been much nicer

if you'd thought

of that yourself.

Well, as a matter of fact,

I did.

- Going in the saloon?

- Yeah.

Business or pleasure?

Business.

So you won't take

my advice, huh?

You mean leave town now?

I'm just beginning to like it.

Take my rabbit's foot.

Keep away from dark corners.

I see now

why you don't need guns...

and why I can't get

my cattle through.

Let me tell you somethin',

Destry.

Nobody's gonna rob me.

I'm takin' 'em through

in spite of you, Kent,

or anybody else.

Oh, I wouldn't do that

if I were you.

You know,

that's trespassin'.

You're cuttin' in on Kent

two or three different ways,

aren't ya?

Whoopee! Quiet.

You'll live.

Evenin' there, Slade.

Sorta hopin' to find you here.

I'd like to have

a little private talk with ya.

Sit down, son.

Now... you got me

surrounded here, huh?

What's on your mind?

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