Dial M for Murder Page #4

I then change them for those

at my leisure.

-Might I see your bank statement?.

-By all means.

Don't touch.

Turn back a page.

Your balance has dropped

by over 1000 during the year.

Suppose the police

ask you about that.

I go dog-racing twice a week.

They'll check your bookmaker.

Like you, I always bet on the tout.

Satisfied?.

When would this take place?.

Tomorrow night.

Tomorrow! Not a chance!

I've got to think this over.

It has to be tomorrow.

I've arranged things that way.

Where?.

Approximately where you're standing now.

-How?.

-Tomorrow evening, Halliday...

...the American boyfriend,

and I will go out to a stag party.

She'll stay here.

She'll go to bed early and

listen to theater on the radio.

She always does when I'm out.

At exactly three minutes to 11, you'll

enter the house through the street door.

You'll find the key to this door...

...under the stair carpet here.

-The fifth step.

-That's the one.

Go straight to the window...

...and hide behind the curtains.

At exactly 11:
00, I'll go

to the telephone in the hotel...

...to call my boss.

I shall dial the wrong number,

this number.

That's all I shall do.

When the phone rings, you'll see the light

go on under her bedroom door.

When she opens it, the light

will stream across the room.

So don't move until

she answers the phone.

There must be as little noise as possible.

After you've finished...

...pick up the phone and give me

a soft whistle and hang up.

Don't speak, whatever you do.

I shan't say a word.

When I hear your whistle,

I shall hang up and redial...

...the correct number this time.

I shall then talk to my boss as if nothing

had happened and return to the party.

What happens next?. Go on.

You'll see the suitcase here.

It contains clothes of mine

for the cleaners.

Open it and tip the clothes

out onto the floor.

Then fill it with a cigarette box

and some of these cups.

Close the lid,

but don't snap the locks.

Then leave the suitcase there,

just as it is now.

As if I'd left in a hurry.

That's the idea.

Now, the window....

If it's locked, unlock it

and leave it open.

Then go out exactly

the same way you came in.

-By this door?.

-Yes.

And here's the most important thing.

As you go out, return the key

to the place where you found it.

-Under the stair carpet?.

-Yes.

Yes, but what exactly is supposed

to have happened?.

Well, they'll assume you came in

by the window.

You thought the apartment was empty,

so you took the suitcase and went to work.

She heard something.

She switched on her light.

You saw the light under the door

and hid behind the curtains.

When she came in here, you attacked her

before she could scream.

When you realized you'd

actually killed her...

...you panicked, bolted through

the garden and left the loot behind.

Just a minute.

I'm supposed to have come in

through these windows.

-Suppose they'd been locked.

-It wouldn't matter.

She often walks around the garden

before she goes to bed.

And she usually forgets to lock up

when she gets back.

That's what I shall tell the police.

Yes, but she may say--

But she isn't going to say anything.

Is she?.

All right.

I leave the apartment.

I put the key back under the stair carpet

and go out by the street door.

Suppose the street door's locked.

-How do I get in, in the first place?.

-The street door is never locked.

-What time will you get back?.

-About 1 2.

I'll bring Halliday back for a nightcap.

We'll find her together...

...and we shall have been together

since we left her.

And there's my alibi.

-You've forgotten something.

-What?.

When you get back

with what's-his-name, Halliday...

-...how will you get in the apartment?.

-I shall let myself in.

But your key will be under the stair carpet.

He'll see you get it.

It'll give the show away.

No. It won't be my key

under the carpet.

It will be hers.

I shall take it from her handbag

and hide it out there...

...just before I leave the flat.

She's not going out,

so she won't miss it.

When I come back with Halliday,

I'll use my own key to let us in.

Then, while he's out searching

the garden or something...

...I'll take the key from under the carpet

and return it to her bag...

-...before the police arrive.

-How many keys are there to this door?.

Just hers and mine.

-Mavel Z4-double-9.

-Tony, it's me.

Hello, darling. How's it going?.

Wonderfully. It's really a dreadful play.

We're enjoying every minute.

I ' m sorry. I mean, I ' m glad.

- You will join us, won 't you?

-I don ' t think so.

I hardly seem to have started.

Darling, just a moment.

I think there' s someone at the door.

You can be seen

from the bedroom window.

Sorry, darling. False alarm.

Look, why don't you

take Mark to Gerry's.

-How do we get in?

-Well, just mention my name.

I don't know about the band,

but the food's good.

By the way,

Maureen called after you left...

...and wants us

for dinner on Wednesday.

You've got something in your diary

for Wednesday, and I can't read it.

Looks like "Al Bentall."

Who's he,

another one of your boyfriends?.

Albert Hall, you idiot.

The Albert Hall, of course.

I'm so glad we don't have

to go to Maureen's.

-She's such a filthy cook.

-Well, there's the bell. I must fly.

All right, dear.

Enjoy yourself.

Tony, don't make

that martini too watery.

Now, where's the picture

of the maharajah?.

When are you going to finish

pasting in those clippings?.

I shall find time one of these days.

Here it is.

This is the maharajah.

-Isn't he dreamy?.

-He had four Rolls-Royces and jewels...

...to sink a battleship, but all he wanted

was to play at Wimbledon.

The poor darling was so shortsighted,

he could barely see the end of the racket...

-...let alone the ball.

-You should--

Thanks, Tony.

You should write a book about all this.

Why don't you two collaborate,

a detective novel with a tennis background.

What about it, Mark?.

You provide me...

-...with the perfect murder.

-Nothing I'd like better.

How do you go about

writing a detective story?.

You forget detection and concentrate

on crime. Crime's the thing.

You imagine you're gonna

steal something or murder somebody.

Is that how you do it?.

Interesting.

I usually put myself in the criminal's shoes

and I keep asking myself:

"What do I do next?."

Do you really believe

in the perfect murder?.

Yes, absolutely.

On paper, that is.

I think I could plan one

better than most people...

...but I doubt I could carry it out.

Oh?. Why not?.

In stories, things turn out

the way the author wants.

And in real life,

they don't always.

No. I'm afraid my murders

would be like my bridge:

I'd make a mistake

and never realize it...

-...till I find everybody looking at me.

-Drink up, Mark.

-Yes.

-What are you doing tomorrow?.

-Nothing.

-Why don't we drive...

-...to Windsor for lunch.

-That's a good idea.

Come along early, but not too early.

-We may be nursing a hangover.

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