Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules

Seventh-grader.

Sounds a lot better

than sixth-grader.

This is a Greg thing.

I don't see why I had to come.

Because, Rodrick,

this is a family event,

and like it or not, you're

part of the Heffley family.

Yeah. That and we already

paid for your ticket.

I'd like to give a warm

welcome to Westmore seventh-graders!

A new year of school starting.

Hi!

Rowley!

Greg!

Alakazam!

Alaka-zoo-wee Mama!

What are you doing?

It's a magic wand.

Do you want

to see a trick?

Only if the trick is to

make the thing disappear.

Just

put it in your pocket!

You don't want to give away

your best tricks in public.

So, how was your summer?

That sounds

pretty rough.

The only good thing

that happened

was I got rid of

the Cheese Touch.

Who'd you give it to?

The new kid.

Jeremy Pindle.

Cheese Touch!

Hey, guys!

Anyone for pizza?

Hey! Thanks, Fregley.

You know,

I can't believe people leave

perfectly good food just lying around.

I'll save that

for later.

Let's skate.

I'd like to give a

shout out to Taylor Pringle!

Uh-oh, dork alert!

Happy birthday, Taylor!

Five years young.

I hope your

party's a blast.

Rowley,

stop pulling me down!

Ho, ho, ho

It's magic

You know

Who is that?

Her name is Holly Hills.

She just moved here.

What grade is she in?

Seventh.

She's an all-star

soccer player,

has done

professional modeling,

and was her sixth grade

class president.

She moved here from Oregon because

her father got a big promotion.

They drive a hybrid SUV,

live on the north side of town

in a cul-de-sac near the park.

What? I googled her!

She's a picture of loveliness, is she not?

She's almost as

pretty as my mom.

She's going to be

very popular.

Sit here!

Sit here!

Please, everyone, sit

down. We have our seats.

It's magic, you know

Never believe it's not so

Excuse me.

What?

I said, excuse me.

You're blocking the exit.

Oh, sorry.

That's okay.

I'm Chirag Gupta.

And I'm single.

Wow. My name is...

We know exactly

who you are.

Holly Hills of

432 Embury Lane.

No, we don't know who you are.

We have no idea

who you are.

Okay! Well, I think I'm

going to go skating now.

Please congratulate your

father on his promotion from me!

"We know exactly who you are"?

You trying to scare her?

Does it really matter?

A girl like that is out of

your league anyway, Gregory.

She's new. She isn't out

of anyone's league yet.

She doesn't know

the social pecking order.

If there was ever a time

for me to make a move,

it's now.

Hey, Greg!

Can you break a leg or

something so we can leave?

Oh!

That'll never happen.

Not a chance.

There's no way that girl

will ever talk to you.

Yeah, well,

I just talked to her

and we'll probably

skate later.

Really? Okay.

Well, you see

that clock?

They play a slow song at the top

of every hour for couples skate.

If you're so confident,

ask her to skate.

Maybe I will.

What you waiting

for, wimp?

You the man!

Look, if we can

get out to Holly

and be standing right next

to her when the clock changes,

then I can ask her to skate

and she'll have to say yes.

I don't know

about that.

Oh, honey, hi!

Remember when we were

young like this,

and we used to dance and go to

parties, and things like that?

Whoo!

I'm going in.

Cover me!

Girl you are to me

all that a woman should be

And I dedicate my life...

All rockers and

hardcore skaters off the rink,

unless you're

looking for love.

It's time for

couples skate.

I'm making my move.

Stop! Enough of that total

lameness! Who's ready to rock? Yeah!

Come on, let's get

out of here. Come on.

What are we gonna do? Stay calm.

All we have to do

is just stay here.

Whoa! Whoa!

Rowley! Hang on!

Greg Heffley!

This is your mother.

Everything is

going to be okay.

Stay where you are, and your

father is going to come rescue you.

I repeat, everything

is going to be okay.

Okay, here he comes. Here comes

Frank. I see him. He's on his way.

Dad!

I know, I know.

Okay. All right, everyone,

go back to skating!

You all right?

Hey, Romeo! How'd it go with the new girl?

Whoa!

You ruined my birthday!

You jerk!

Hey! Hey, ow! Ow! Ow, that hurt!

Rodrick!

Here, catch!

Let me start by saying that having

a brother is really overrated.

Rowley always says he

wishes he had a brother,

and, boy, do I wish I

could give him one of mine.

I've looked into it and,

unfortunately, it's not legal,

I mean, Manny has been telling on me

ever since he was

able to speak.

Bubby did it.

Bubby did it.

Greg!

And Rodrick is

the king of laziness.

Except when it comes

to torturing me.

My mom has

started writing

an advice column

for the local paper.

She wrote an article

last week

about how your brothers

will always be there for you.

Well, that's exactly

what I'm afraid of.

Hey, Bubby.

Got to go, Mom.

Later, Mom.

Yeah, see you, hon.

Okay, okay, wait.

Hold on.

Wait a second.

I need a moment

for a family meeting.

Now, your father and I

have been talking.

Things between you two have

really gotten out of hand.

Can I just say...

You may not

realize it now,

but having a brother is one of the most

important relationships of your life.

I mean, one day you're gonna be Uncle Greg

and Uncle Rodrick

to each other's kids.

That's important. So you need

to get to know each other.

What?

What?

You need to spend more time together. What?

So that's why I've come up with a new program

that's going to reward you

for spending time together.

I'm calling it...

"Mom Bucks"!

You're paying us with fake money?

Yeah.

Okay, now, for every hour that you

spend together without fighting,

for example, let's say you

give Greg a drum lesson,

you each earn a Mom Buck,

which you can then trade

in for one real dollar.

Oh.

So to start you off, I'm

giving you each five Mom Bucks.

Now, if you're smart, you'll

save up your Mom Bucks...

Can I cash out now?

Well, Rodrick,

if you save...

But can I cash out?

Yes, but...

I want to cash out.

Frank?

I know.

Uh... Okay. Yes, you can. All right.

Okay. All right, great.

We should get going,

because you don't want to be

late for school. All right?

Yeah, gotta go. Let's go. Okay, all right.

This Mom Bucks thing

is a gold mine, muchacho.

You better not

ruin it for me.

Most kids hate it

when summer ends,

but I have to say, right now, school

is starting to look pretty good.

Welcome back.

It's nice not to be

the new kids this year.

I agree.

I know. Look at all

the tiny sixth-graders.

I'm so glad that's

not me this year.

Just a little higher.

Just a little higher.

Whoa, Greg!

Look who's in our class!

This was my chance.

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