Diary Of The Dead

- Not here.

- The f***in' usual.

So no big deal these days, right?

Some guy, what's his name?

- Uh, I don't know.

- Who knows, who cares.

Who cares.

F***in'.

Shoots his wife and kid,

and eats the f***in' licorice.

Sticks it in his mouth

and blows his f***in' brains out.

This guy has no ID,

no f***in' papers.

He probably squirreled over

the goddamn border.

Hey guys.

Channel 13.

Listen up, you're kind of blocking the shot,

can I get you to move forward a bit?

- Yeah sure.

- Thanks.

- You Ready?

- Yeah, almost.

Two minutes. (inaudible)

and we'll roll.

- Can't get close enough for an Emmy.

- Screw the Emmy!

- Settle for a f***in' paycheck.

- Story of my life.

We downloaded this video off the internet

sometime over the last three days,

I can't remember

exactly when.

Look at this guy.

Look at this f***in' guy!

Chowing down while his buddies are

shoving a corpse in the back of the van.

Some of this footage

was never broadcast.

It was secretly uploaded by

the cameraman who shot it.

It was his way of trying to tell the truth

about what was happening.

Bree Reno, reporting live

from Homestead,

where tragedy be-felled

an immigrant family.

An unidentified man has shot his

wife and 16 year old son to death

before turning the

gun on himself.

- Jesus!

- What?

- I don't believe this!

- What?

Is there something wrong with

the camera, just fix it!

She's still moving!

For Christ sake, Willy,

I'm right in the middle of...

- What?

- Jesus f***in' Christ!

For god's sake!

- I thought they were dead.

- They're supposed to be, they are!

I don't know, she's moving on

the freakin' gurney man!

- Get out of the way, come on.

- I need some backup here.

Get off of him!

- Are you all right?

- Jesus, what the f*** was that?

- Keep still.

- The other ones moving!

Another one coming up too.

Take them out!

He's not going down.

He's not going down!

Holy sh*t!

Freeze!

You must shoot

them in the head!

No! No!

This can't be happening!

This can't be f***in' happening!

We downloaded a lot of what we found

off on television, on the net, off blogs.

Images and commentaries

over those first few days.

Most of it was bullshit.

None of it was useful.

This is what we were getting

from the news networks.

None of us can

claim to know exactly

what has caused the chaos,

that we've stand from experience.

A natural calamity or sort of

a massive or monstrous hoax?

I'm old enough to

remember Orson Wells'

'War of the World's,' possibly the

greatest hoax ever perpetrated.

That was just radio.

Now, its 24/7.

This is some kind of...

we are led to believe

almost anything...

We made a film,

the one I'm going to show you now.

Actually, Jason was the

one who wanted to make it.

Like that camera man

from Channel 13,

He wanted to upload it so that people,

you, could be told the truth.

The film was shot with a

Panasonic HDX-900-and a HVX-200.

I did the final cut

on Jason's laptop.

I've added music occasionally

for effects, hoping to scare you.

You see, in addition to

trying to tell you the truth

I am hoping to scare you,

so that maybe

you'll wake up.

Maybe you won't make any of

the same mistakes that we made.

Anyway, here it is:

Jason Creed:
The Death of Death.

No!

Cut! Cut!

How many times have I told you

that these things don't move fast?

You're a corpse,

for Christ sake!

If you run that fast,

your ankles are gonna snap off.

She's going fast, I have to go fast,

otherwise how am I supposed to catch her?

You're supposed to catch her later.

This is the beginning of the f***in' movie.

You catch her now,

it's all over.

All you're supposed to do

is grab her dress, till...

...till my tits fall out?

Ain't gonna happen!

You know, can somebody

please explain to me

why girls in scary movies always have to

fall down and lose their shoes and sh*t?

It's totally lame.

And why do we do have to get

our dresses torn off?

Actually, I'm looking

forward to that part.

- Flashing!

- I swear...

Thanks.

Ah sh*t man, look at this,

your makeup is all unglued.

Give me a break!

Yeah, maybe you can see now,

because you're in way too tight.

All you're supposed to do

is run into the f***in' shot.

No, not run...

shamble.

The script says the mummy

shambles into the frame and stops

for a second...

for one second.

You're telling me in one second you can see...

- The camera can see

and what the camera sees,

the audience will see.

What f***in' audience?

There's always an audience for horror,

believable horror.

But who's gonna believe a mummy

if his makeup is all unglued?

Who's gonna believe a

mummy in the first place?

Here's a thought, genius.

Try zooming out, maybe

your f***in' shot will work.

I know what I want here, Tony,

and I know what I'm doing.

That's right, you do,

don't ya?

We're only what, four days over

a three day shooting schedule?

Great, you're doing fine.

I hope we'll get f***in' credits.

- You'll all be in the credits.

- Talking about college credits.

Leave those to me.

- Did we get the shot yet?

- No, we're still dickin' around.

Five credits for the each of you,

that's a pledge.

Mr. Creed has a vision.

Hey, I'm just trying to

make a scary movie here.

Yes, you are,

Mr. Creed.

Jason always wanted to

be a documentary filmmaker,

but for his senior class project,

he decided to try to make

a horror film instead.

In fact, that's what he was

shooting on that first night.

The night, when...

everything changed.

Stupid f***in'

horror movie.

With an underlying

thread of social satire.

Jason, can I

take a minute?

- I have to pee.

- Oh sh*t. Alright.

- Jason...

- What?

I have to pee, too.

Jesus Christ, this whole

thing is falling apart.

Hey guys, uh, there's something

on the news. It's pretty...

well, I mean...

you might want to check this out.

...but it does seem to happening.

Two news agencies in two separate

counties in the tri-state area

are reporting accounts

of the dead returning to life.

In one of the cases, the one

in Summerset, the dead man,

identified as a

the victim of a drive-by

shooting yesterday,

sat up on the autopsy table and actually

attacked Somerset medical examiners...

- Horseshit.

- Shut up, Tony, it's on the f***in' news.

The news is always horseshit. Always makes

things sound worse than they really are.

That's how they

sell soap.

And the next morning what happens?

"Oh sorry, our mistake. "

and when they say that, who's gonna

believe this sh*t, two dead people...

There are now

five dead people and...

here's another.

They're coming in from everywhere.

A corpse at Hope Memorial,

has apparently survived.

Thats six separate reports.

Six?

How could there be six mistakes?

For Christs sake, we hear

those sort of thing every day.

Yeah, the hurricane,

the planet gettin' too hot,

and the terrorist that was gonna dump a dirty

bomb on the Whitehouse or your house.

Somebody gonna put some germs

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