Domino Page #11

So, today, Domino and her team are out

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to nab four criminals for forging checks

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with counterfeit driver's licences.

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What can you tell us about

these 4 creeps, Domino?

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Apparently, they call

themselves the First Ladies.

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Domino:
Jackie Onassis...

his real name was Lester Kincaid.

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Yo, yo, yo yo, yo

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# I gotta strip, I gotta give some lip

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# I gotta make my tip

# My tip

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Hey, Rochelle.

Oh. Put your mama on the phone.

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Hey, what's happening, baby?

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Lester Kincaid, you're going to jail.

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What the f*** is this sh*t? Hey, man!

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I need clearances.

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Boom! Aah!

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Pow!

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- Go, go.

- Cho... Chocko... Choco.

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Jesus. This guy's a psychopath.

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Man:
What do we get for $10?

Woman:
Everything you want.

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Domino:
Nancy Reagan turned out to be...

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a sex addict named Howie Stein.

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My name is Howie, and I am

a recovering nymphomaniac.

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Man:
Yeah!

Crowd:
Hi, Howie.

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# Oh, me so horny,

oh, oh, me so horny

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# Oh, me so horny,

me love you long time

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[Turns off]

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Now, if 2 Live Crew

has taught us anything,

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it's that horniness in today's society

is out of control.

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And at one point

within the next decade,

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mark my words, ladies and gentlemen,

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society will have reached

something I call...

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[# "Hail to the Chief"]

APATT...

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"All porno, all the time."

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Pornography will have become

an epidemic in this country.

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Phase one... masturbation.

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- Who's this chump?

- That's Howard Stein.

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He's an entertainment lawyer,

some sh*t firm.

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Love him.

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He's so attractive.

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And to our female friends here today,

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We must not abuse of our dogs with

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the lure of a peanut butter snatch.

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We must channel our horniness

into extracurricular activities.

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Howard Stein, you're under arrest.

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Whoa! Look, he's got him by the eyes.

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# Oh, me so horny,

me love you long time

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[Siren blaring]

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Domino:
Barbara Bush

and Hillary Clinton were next.

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[Dance music playing]

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Domino:
Frances and Charles Cigliutti.

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Their father was mob boss Anthony Cigliutti.

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They were Mafia kids.

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We found them at their frat house,

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and they'd been under FBI surveillance

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for the past six months.

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[Tuning in to frequency]

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[Chattering, music playing]

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[Honks horn]

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All right, boys, we're in business.

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Yeah. The bounty hunters have arrived.

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They're driving Winne...

driving Winnebagos?

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What is this sh*t?

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Is that the guy from

Beverly Hills 90210?

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- I f***in' loved that show, man.

- Well, he hasn't aged well.

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We're looking for Frances and Charles!

Are they here?

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[Laughter, cheering]

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We're from a new reality TV show.

It's called Bounty Squad.

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[Cheering]

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Jesus, look at that.

She just tells it like it is.

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It's... It's... we should sign her.

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Crowd:
Frances! Frances!

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Frances! Frances!

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Frances! Frances!

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All right, 60 seconds.

Here's the question.

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Which one of you is Frances?

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[Crowd shouting]

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This girl is gonna be a star.

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We should sign her

to a talent holding deal.

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Stay down!

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F***er!

[He gags]

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[Barking, car alarm chirps]

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Oh, f***!

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Wow.

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Oh, f***.

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I told him back off.

It's too psychotic.

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[Cell phone rings]

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- Hello?

- You get all four?

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- Yeah.

- Good.

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Deliver them to the Needles DMV,

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sundown,

the Sam Kinison Monument.

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Why in the f*** out there?

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Listen, I can't even find any warrants in the system

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for these four.

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The system hasn't been updated is all.

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- Hey.

- How you doing?

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- This is all an act, isn't it?

- What is?

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This... this whole tough chick thing.

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What makes you so sure?

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I'm an actor.

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