Door to Door Page #4

Those two are like an old married couple.

They've been together forever.

What do you mean?

That's not right. That's a sin.

If you can find somebody to love,

I think that's a good thing.

We don't believe in it.

God made all of us, Shelly.

He doesn't make mistakes.

How's Kimmy?

She's doing good. She's good.

Her father's got her this weekend.

Listen, Bill,

tell him to put a timer on his porch light.

I chased some kids out of there.

He rattles around in that house.

I don't know why he doesn't sell it.

Is he seeing anyone?

I'm sure I don't know.

I think Rhonda's death

was really hard on Bob.

We all take our knocks, don't we?

Life goes on.

What's with her?

It's kind of a long story, but...

You see that tree?

I'll pick you up at a quarter to.

No.

Will you stop?

I'll be here at a quarter of eight.

You better be ready.

I don't want you spending your money-

I can't hear you.

I'm putting on a dress,

for your information.

I think his parents are very...

- Thank you.

- Happy birthday.

Wait.

It makes your wish come true.

Make a wish.

- Come here, birthday boy.

- Thank you.

You know what?

What?

I'm really proud of you tonight.

Why?

You haven't tried to sell laundry detergent

to one person here.

I was gonna hit them up on the way out.

You're the best thing

that's ever happened to me, Shelly.

Do you know that?

Don't get all mushy on me.

Come on.

Where?

Come on.

No.

I don't want to. I don't think so.

Come on!

Watch me, okay?

Joseph Sloan.

Shelly Soentpiet.

Steven Squall.

It took me six years, but I finally did it.

- I'm so proud of you.

- Thank you.

I wanted you to meet John.

Who's John?

Hey, missy!

- We did it.

- Yeah.

Mom and Dad

are gonna take you to the restaurant.

I thought I lost you there.

- Hi.

- Congratulations.

Thanks. John, this is-

Bill Porter, of course. The "boss. "

It's great to finally meet you.

It's nice to meet you, John.

Two degrees, isn't he annoying?

You know what? We should go.

We're gonna ride with John's dad, right?

My folks will take you over.

Okay.

Thanks for coming!

- We'll meet you at the restaurant.

- Okay.

- 'Bye.

- 'Bye.

Bill, this is turning into a science project.

I don't even know what that was.

Has John decided

which offer he's going to take?

He's leaning towards Bendix.

Where are they?

Chicago.

Chicago?

I know. I can't even think about that.

When?

I don't know.

Damn it!

What?

The "B" sticks.

Get rid of that thing.

We should get a computer.

I can't afford a computer.

Yes, you can.

John could get one real cheap.

We could do everything on it.

I don't like them.

We have electricity

and indoor plumbing now, Bill.

We should just toss that piece of...

Hey, I did those already.

What?

The orders. I already did them. Here.

- Why?

- I had some time, so-

I do the orders.

I know that, but I just-

I do the order forms!

But it takes you so long,

I just thought that-

I don't want you to do them.

All right.

- I have my own way.

- All right.

I have to read them,

so I have to write them.

You're not helping me, Shelly.

If you think you're helping me, you're not.

I'm sorry.

It's just, I have a certain way.

I'm not talking about the forms.

Thanks very much. I appreciate it.

Hey, Bill.

Chuck, congratulations.

Thanks very much. Peter!

Peter.

I'd like you to meet Bill Porter.

- Peter Schaefer.

- Nice to meet you.

Peter's taking over for me.

Welcome to Watkins.

Thank you.

We're gonna miss this guy.

Hey, Porter!

Excuse me.

What's he do?

He's a salesman.

Seriously.

I am serious.

Did you see what happened to Frigidaire?

He's a salesman.

Kelvinator!

What, for us?

Whose idea was that?

Mine.

You are so...

If you made a dollar a year for 5,000 years.

Congratulations, Chuck.

Thanks, Tom.

And thanks everybody for 43 great years.

Thank you.

Chuck, you stay retired.

I don't want to catch you over at Fuller.

Only if they pay me to fly-fish.

like Bardot. Maybe not exactly, right?

But her lips...

I take the lid off, and she leans...

over the couch to smell the stuff,

and her robe kind of...

And I'm staring at two

of the most exquisite...

perfectly shaped, porcelain white ta-tas.

I look up, she's smelling the stuff,

and I say to myself-

Bill Porter.

It's you! You won!

What?

Salesman of the Year. Get up there.

Come on up here, Bill.

- Congratulations.

- Thank you.

We are so proud to have you

as a part of this company.

This past year, Bill had sales...

of $42,460.

Bill Porter. Salesman of the Year!

I love being a salesman.

My father was a salesman.

I wish he could be here.

And my mother, who taught me...

patience and persistence.

And who would never let me be ashamed.

I wish she could be here today.

Thank you.

Take it to that house over there, okay?

You got it? It's not too heavy?

Wait, hold on.

This is messed up.

Bill, you labeled that wrong.

It's all right.

No. You've got Bob at 825 Elm.

That's Charlotte's.

No, it's all right.

What do you want me to do with the box?

To Bob.

Should I change the label?

- No.

- Bill!

Could someone tell me

where to take this box?

Please take it to that house.

Thank you, Michelle.

Okay.

Okay, fine. It's wrong, but fine.

This must be yours.

Bill got the address wrong.

I'll just leave it right here.

Wait.

It's just junk mail,

but you might want it or whatever.

Want me to take this in the house for you?

Okay.

I got a wall there. This is better.

Larry took that down.

I see you get the barbecue sauce.

Yeah.

Have you tried the lemon garlic?

No.

Is it good?

I don't know. Bill says it is.

Put it on that table.

Yes?

I'm looking for Mrs. Sullivan.

Are you a friend of hers?

She's a customer.

I'm with the Watkins Company.

I'm her daughter-in-law.

Gladys passed away last week.

I didn't know she was sick.

I'm sorry.

How did she die?

It was an accident.

Some kind of reaction

to the medication she was taking.

It was vodka and sleeping pills.

Frank, they don't know that.

Are you Bill Parker?

Bill Porter.

Come here. I want to show you something.

She talked about you...

a lot.

Every year, at Christmas,

no matter what else we'd get...

we'd get the Watkins spice collection...

the soup bases, the liniment.

Dog biscuits...

Damn dog died years ago.

Excuse me.

Hey, Bill. What do you think?

Very nice, Richard.

It was supposed to have been done

months ago. You guys are up on two now.

Okay.

You got a card? You need a security card.

Could you take your hat off, please, sir?

You got to do it fast.

Bingo!

Have a good one.

Pretty cool, huh?

Hello, Peter. What is this?

This is all the 800 number.

Makes us door-to-door guys

look like dinosaurs.

You know, each operator

is selling $300 to $500 an hour.

They're taking orders. They aren't selling.

When you cash a check,

George Washington looks the same.

There's Clark.

A lot of the door-to-door guys

are moving over.

I've never done well on the phone.

Women find my voice sexy,

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