Double Dare Page #5

---

a land in turmoil cried out for a hero.

This is our--number six.

Four for me.

I'm been to about

fifteen Xena conventions.

She was Xena.

And I just think it's the greatest thing

that ever happened--

this whole series.

I'm really going to miss the show.

This show has changed my life

in so many ways.

The power.

The passion.

The danger.

Her courage will change the world.

Zoe Bell!

Thank you. Thank you very much.

- Oh, yeah, totally.

- We're mobbing you.

I'm loving it. Are you serious?

We will continue

our love affair with Xena.

Me? No.

I'm unemployed at the moment.

Do one more sideways.

Sideways, yeah.

Sideways, of course.

Thank you.

OK, take care.

Oh, I need a glass of water

or something, you know?

- Have a good time. See you.

- OK. You, too.

I will.

We're looking for a gown

for the Stunt Awards.

It'll be May 20th.

It's like the Academy Awards,

only it's for the stunt people.

Yeah. A little too conservative.

You have to at least try it on for us.

Tracy...

She might want to wear it.

This is not me.

You would be uncomfortable in that.

You can't wear this.

It actually doesn't look bad

on you, though--if it fit.

You're kidding, right?

There you go. Put the belt on.

Oh, God, I hate getting old and fat.

- It's OK.

- Just OK?

Oh, no.

I don't think so.

Well, we tried.

- Thanks.

- You're welcome.

- Bye.

- Bye.

Do you want to come with us?

Oh, that would be excellent.

Well, get yourself a dress.

Come over to my house.

You should come over

and get all fixed up.

Eurlyne's going to be here,

and we're all going to go in a limo.

Yeah. We'll do that.

So, why don't you get settled in,

and we'll sort out all the details?

Absolutely. I will do.

It was good to talk to you.

Well, you, too.

I'm looking forward to meeting you.

And I'm looking forward

to meeting you, Zoe. Take care.

- Bye.

- Bye.

Oh, I feel all safe...

and under the wing

of a big mother duck and stuff.

I love that feeling.

Cheers.

Damn, that's strong.

I'm stuck.

I can't get it on or off properly.

All right. I've got it. I got it, I got it.

Nice.

Oh, it's totally too big, eh?

Bummer.

What do you think about the dress?

It's amazing.

It's, like, formal. It's really nice.

It shows your physique.

It's $250.

Which is 500 New Zealand dollars.

Is it too tight on my ass?

All right, f*** it. I'll get it.

New Zealand. Thank you.

Where'd you put the champagne?

How weird.

I'm just going to meet her at the door.

OK. I think I froze this poor baby.

Zoe!

- How are you?

- How are you?

Good. You look gorgeous.

Oh, thank you. Me? You.

- Me? I have a pimple.

- Yeah. Oh, you have a pimple.

Well, we have a make-up artist

here to fix that.

Perfect.

- Hi. This is Zoe.

- How you doing?

- Good. Nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you, too.

This is Eurlyne's dress. Come on in.

I just got my period.

Do you have stuff?

Yeah. But that is just so uncool--

the one day.

Guess what? When you get my age,

you don't have it anymore.

That is so cool.

That is cool.

I mean, I'd rather look your age...

and have the body functions

that I have...

but it doesn't work that way.

Well, it's one advantage.

It's a give-and-take situation, isn't it?

Yeah. I'll be right back.

Yeah. You go back

and get that taken care of.

I got it.

- Are you excited?

- Yeah.

How can I not be? I've got my heels on.

Do you ever wear heels?

No. I had to work in heels once.

But aside from that, no.

Everybody, cheers.

- Cheers.

- Cheers.

How do you talk

with that thing in your lip?

Oh, I was going to put

the other one in.

I just talk like normal.

I don't even notice.

How do you give a blow job with that?

I do great blow jobs with it--

Oh, my God, we're miked!

Hey, Eurl,

I have a feeling she's one of us.

- Yep.

- Yep.

There's so many phonies

in Hollywood. Let me tell you.

- Yeah, I know.

- Oh, God.

- Arnold.

- Arnold.

Arnold? Arnold?

Arnold.

Fix my dress.

Is Erica with

Merv Griffin Productions here?

- Arnold.

- Arnold. Arnold. Arnold!

It would be nice if there were

separate categories for women.

Women do a different variety

of stunts sometimes, and--

But they did make

a women's category this year...

so we're making headway.

We're here to make Hollywood history.

These stunt artists are the ones

taking the greatest risks...

often with the least amount

of recognition.

But tonight, we plan to change all that.

Best Overall Stunt by a Stuntwoman.

And the Taurus Award goes to--

duh-duh-duh-duh--

Debbie Evans

for "The Fast and the Furious".

Thank you. What an honor.

Thank you to Jeannie Epper,

my good friend and mentor...

Donna Evans,

my beautiful and talented sister...

Gary Epper for teaching me

how to stunt-drive.

Last but not least,

I'd like to thank God...

for protecting me for all these years.

Thank you very much.

It's a great honor.

You know what my favorite game

is for stunt people?

What's that?

It's Tickle and Pee. Let me show you.

Another great game to play

is Scratch and Sniff. Come here.

No, you're not scratching me.

What is that?

What is that?

And what are these?

Imagine having one of those

on your mantle piece.

I'm going to have to leave TV

and go to features.

You want to go with me, Zoe?

What are you doing?

You going to jump through it?

I'm going to go through it

and go to the other side.

You're going to just walk or jump?

Go, go, go, go.

One, two, three, go!

Oh, sh*t!

Let's go.

Who needs class?

We got none.

Oh, my gosh. You were right here.

Go to the kiwis.

No sh*t.

Vicki Pratt wants me to ring her...

and, like, double her

on her show in Vancouver.

She used to be Miss America

or something...

and she's been on Xena before.

I'm so going to have to work out.

You got to see this woman.

Oh, you wouldn't believe.

She's the bomb.

It may not happen.

Jeez, damn.

Are we good tongue doubles?

We do!

I know.

Oh, my God!

I can shake my harness hips.

You look good in your harness.

I don't know if anyone

looks good in the harness.

You do.

All right, all right, so...

- So, I'll see you Tuesday.

- Yes.

Oh, my God, I'm so excited.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I get Zoe. I get Zoe.

I'm sorry to keep you up so late.

I felt myself grow up in a split-second

when I had to make the decision...

to not take that personally,

to be an adult about it...

and accept that he's got his reasons...

or they've got their reasons for doing it.

And it's just one step and a part of life.

And you've got connections,

and you can go home now...

you know what I mean?

It's a good thing, but--

Rejection's a big issue in Hollywood...

and you have to be able

to overcome a lot of rejection.

Whether you're working

in front of the camera...

or behind the camera...

people can just erase you.

When I was in my late forties

and maybe my early fifties...

it was really hard, because

you'd go through these issues...

of "They don't want me anymore.

My phone isn't ringing like it used to".

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes