Down to Earth Page #9

Synopsis: It seems everyone is trying to get into heaven; at least those whose time is up. For Lance Barton, a struggling comedian and bicycle messenger, it's the last thing on his mind. His due date upstairs is 50 years away. In the meantime, he's got big dreams to pursue on Earth, such as landing a slot at the final Amateur Night Contest at the famed Apollo Theatre. Lance's has one little problem though - he ain't that funny. Thanks to an over-cautious emissary from heaven, Mr. Keyes, he's going to get hit (literally) with a much bigger problem. Showing that even God has difficulty finding good help these days, the inept minion mistakenly plucks Lance from a traffic accident - before it takes place. Transporting him to the Pearly Gates, or more accurately, the velvet roped-lines of the hottest club around, the error is finally addressed by Mr. King, the streetwise, no-nonsense head angel who manages the place from his plush windowed office. Since returning to his own body on Earth is impossibl
Genre: Comedy, Fantasy
Director(s): Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz
Production: Paramount Pictures
  3 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.4
Metacritic:
32
Rotten Tomatoes:
20%
PG-13
Year:
2001
87 min
$63,095,559
Website
453 Views


The funny thing | about reincarnation, kid:

Even when you're not you, | you're still you.

Don't worry. | I got a good feeling about this.

Don't worry? | I had a hard enough time...

trying to get this girl | as a rich white man.

Do you know how hard it's gonna be | to try to get her as a broke black man?

See you around, Joe.

That's what I'm talking about. | You and me on the road.

We could blow up, son! | Joe, are you allright?

Lance.

L- Lance.

Hey, Lance, come on, man. | Let's celebrate.

- I got some big plans for us. | - What are you talking about?

Lance, come on. | Nobody else is around.

- Why do you keep calling me Lance? | - Uh-

Look at me for- | for a second, will ya?

- Lance. | - Joe Guy.

Oh, you mean your boy, | Lance Barton.

Oh, I'm sorry. | You're still dealing with that, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah, I, uh... guess I am.

- Look. Mr. Daniels- | - Whitney.

Okay. Whitney, | I don't have a manager.

Would it be cool to come by | your office and leave a tape?

You know, like maybe | you could take me on?

Yeah. Sure.

Call me tomorrow, huh?

You're, uh-

You're a good kid.

Thanks a lot. | I'm gonna call you tomorrow.

- Right. | - Joe Guy.

- Don't act like you don't know me. | - No, man.

And you know what? If you don't like | the tape, keep it to yourself.

- Right, right. | - It's gonna be all right.

Oh, um, excuse me. | I'm looking for Whitney Daniels.

Uh, Whitney Daniels? | Yeah, just go straight.

Make a right | and go down the stairs.

When you get by the dressing rooms, | he should be there.

Thanks.

Oh, I'm sorry, but do you think | they'll let me back there?

Yeah, sure. | The show's been over for about an hour.

- Do I know you? | - No.

No, no, seriously. | I'm not joking.

I just feel like | I've met you before.

Joe.

- Joe Guy. | - Sontee Jenkins.

Sontee.

Thanks.

Oh.

Last call at the Apollo. We better | get out of here before they lock us in.

Give me your hand. | I know my way around here.

Don't be scared. | Everything's all right.

What did you just say?

Everything's all right. Like the song. | Everything is all right

It's just that | when you said that, it-

- You're a comedian? | - Do I sing that bad?

No. You were on tonight. | How'd you do?

They didn't boo. | You know, they got this after party-

- Sorry. I didn't mean to hold you up. | - No, no, no, no, no.

I don't feel like going to the party. | You wanna get something to eat?

Are you asking me out?

No, I just want to feed you.

Yeah. I'm starved.

- Nice shoes. | - Thankyou.

So what do you do?

- I'm into medicine. | - What are you, a drug dealer?

Watch it. No. Actually, | I own Brooklyn Community Hospital.

You own a hospital? | I know Brooklyn Community.

My uncle went there for a new liver, and | they sent his ass to the supermarket.

Hello, Sontee. | How're you doing, sir?

- This your ride? | - Yeah.

Well, ifyou want to keep it, | you better get it out of here.

- This is nice! | - Cisco.

What kind of mileage | you get on this?

Oh, pretty good.

Cocktails, Miss Jenkins?

- So are you the maid? | - The maid?

- Do I look like the maid? I'm the paid. | - This is my friend Wanda.

And look at you. Let you out of | the car, and you're pickin' up strays.

- Did you know your coat's bleeding? | - Mind your business.

Hey, girls, did you know | That pretty boys they need no more

You better find you a love | you can trust

And expect to like his mother

Hey, fellas, you better find | A girl who loves you more

- You okay, Sontee? | - I'm okay. You okay?

- I'm okay. | - Cisco, you okay?

- I'm okay. Wanda, you okay? | - Hell, no! I spilled my drink.

You know what? | You drink. I'm gonna drive.

Didn't I tell you | to keep an eye on him?

I was tying my shoe, and when I looked | up- It won't happen again, sir.

Cisco, you got any music?

Here you go.

With my mind on my money | And my money on my mind

Rollin' down the street | smokin' Indo

- Sippin' on gin and juice | - Laid back

With my mind on my money | and my money on my mind

Rollin' down the street | smokin' Indo

- Sippin' on gin and juice | - Laidback

With my mind on my money | And my money on my mind

I got me some Seagram's gin

Everybody got they cups | but they ain't chipped in

Now, this type of sh*t | Happens all the time

You gotta get yours | But, fool, I gotta get mine

Everything is fine when you | listenin' to the D-O-G

I got the cultivatin' music | that be captivatin' he

You think you're slick in every way

Changing up the codes | On your phone everyday

Is there something that you're | trying to hide from me

I never gave you reason to run and | Take your calls in the other room

Am I the only one | Or is somebody else getting at you

Is it my imagination

Things ain't always | what they seem

'Cause I don't wanna be

Just another name | In your little black book

Just another face in the crowd | And it's got me shook

I gotta mean | a little more to you

Than a space in your list | Of your things to do

Another G-Shock done | In your Benz

Another dime piece | That you can show all your friends

You can call me crazy | say I'm insecure

But I don't wanna be

Oooh, oh, ohh

Ohhh

Mm, mm

Strange how you claim | to tell the truth

When the passenger's seat | In your car's been moved

And you swore that there was | no one else but you, you

And something else | you can't explain

Why'd you call me | By somebody else's name

You say it's history | Your playing days are through

Or so you say

Is it my imagination

Things ain't always | what they seem

'Cause I don't wanna be

Just another name | In your little black book

Just another face in the crowd | And it's got me shook

'Cause I gotta mean | a little more to you

Than a space in your list | Of your things to do

Another G-Shock done | In your Benz

Another dime piece | That you can show all your friends

You can call me crazy | say I'm insecure

Tell me, are you lying | Or is it my suspicious mind

I gotta know the truth

If I am just another girl

You're treatin' wrong

Another one | You string along

Is it you and me | Is it two or three

'Cause I don't wanna be

Just another name | In your little black book

Just another face in the crowd | And it's got me shook

I gotta mean | a little more to you

Than a space in your list | Of your things to do

Another G-Shock done | In your Benz

Another dime piece | That you can show all your friends

You can call me crazy | say I'm insecure

But I don't wanna be | just another girl

In your little black book

Just another face in the crowd | And it's got me shook

I gotta mean | a little more to you

Than a space in your list | Of your things to do

Another G-Shock done | In your Benz

Another dime piece | That you can show all your friends

You can call me crazy | say I'm insecure

But I don't wanna be | just another girl

Just another face in the crowd | And it's got me shook

I gotta mean | a little more to you

Than a space in your list | Of your things to do

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Chris Rock

Christopher Julius Rock is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, producer and director. After working as a stand-up comedian and appearing in supporting film roles, Rock came to wider prominence as a cast member of Saturday Night Live in the early 1990s. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Down to Earth" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/down_to_earth_7192>.

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