Earthbound Page #3

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Why?

Why?

Why not?

You're not really

supposed to ask that.

Supposed to ask that.

Really?

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's not exactly the done thing

it's not exactly the done thing

when you're asking

when you're asking

someone out.

Okay.

How should I have done it?

You're not really

supposed to ask that either.

Sorry.

I've never actually

I've never actually

asked anyone out before.

Asked anyone out before.

If I didn't do it right,

I'd just like to know

where I went wrong because,

where I went wrong because,

well, I don't think

well, I don't think

I'm ever gonna meet anyone

I'm ever gonna meet anyone

like you ever again.

Like you ever again.

But, if I did,

but, if I did,

I wouldn't want to

I wouldn't want to

ruin my chances again.

Ruin my chances again.

That's really sweet

that's really sweet

in a potential serial killer

in a potential serial killer

kind of way.

Kind of way.

Look, you seem really nice,

look, you seem really nice,

it's just I just got out of a

it's just I just got out of a

really messed up relationship.

Really messed up relationship.

He's actually my

he's actually my

psychology lecturer

psychology lecturer

and he's the one that got me

and he's the one that got me

the job at the hospital

the job at the hospital

and I still see him every day.

And I still see him every day.

Quasar.

Quasar.

Do you ever play quasar?

Do you ever play quasar?

You know, with the guns.

so, you play this a lot then?

So, you play this a lot then?

Not for a while.

Not for a while.

I'm a little bit rusty.

I'm a little bit rusty.

Ah!

Ah!

That would explain it.

That would explain it.

Oh look, it's orion.

Can you see it?

Can you see it?

It's the one with three stars

it's the one with three stars

in a row just there.

In a row just there.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah, I know.

Oh.

Oh.

Me and my dad

me and my dad

used to be real star gazers.

Used to be real star gazers.

Used to be?

Used to be?

Well, I kind of

well, I kind of

stopped looking when he died.

Stopped looking when he died.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to upset you.

I didn't mean to upset you.

No, it's fine.

No, 'cause I know that

speaking about death

speaking about death

makes people sad.

Well, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was always

looking at the stars

looking at the stars

when I was young

when I was young

because I couldn't really

because I couldn't really

go out during the day.

Go out during the day.

I used to get these really bad

I used to get these really bad

blisters from the sun.

Blisters from the sun.

I got better though.

I got better though.

I adapted.

I adapted.

Don't you get

don't you get

rickets from that?

Rickets from that?

Yeah.

But then I just used to

drink milk with vitamin d in it,

drink milk with vitamin d in it,

and then I found out I had

and then I found out I had

a lactose intolerance, so...

A lactose intolerance, so...

Oh.

Oh.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What else are you allergic to?

What else are you allergic to?

Nothing much.

Nothing much.

Just peanuts, and eggs.

Just peanuts, and eggs.

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm.

Bee stings, shellfish,

bee stings, shellfish,

wheat, soy, latex.

How you discovered

the latex allergy.

Should you be eating that then?

I shouldn't, no.

I shouldn't, no.

No.

No.

Okay.

Okay.

It's too cold anyway.

It's too cold anyway.

Yeah, isn't it?

Yeah, isn't it?

well, joe, that was

well, joe, that was

one of the more unusual dates

one of the more unusual dates

I've been on.

I've been on.

I had fun though.

I had fun though.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Well, that's good.

Well, that's good.

Just so you know,

just so you know,

most of my dates

most of my dates

are much more normal than this.

Are much more normal than this.

Look, you're a really

sweet guy.

Sweet guy.

And it's not that I don't,

and it's not that I don't,

it's just...This probably

it's just...This probably

can't go anywhere, and...

Can't go anywhere, and...

And it wouldn't be fair

and it wouldn't be fair

to lead you on.

To lead you on.

Okay.

Maybe I'll call in some time

and see how much the she-ra

and see how much the she-ra

is selling for.

Can I ask you a question?

Mm hmm.

Mm hmm.

Was it worth it,

was it worth it,

selling all of your toys

selling all of your toys

to hold onto your flat?

It's a really nice flat.

It was the responsible thing

to do, so...

You still have most of them,

don't you?

Don't you?

I mean, you haven't sold

I mean, you haven't sold

all of it, have you?

All of it, have you?

Wait here a second.

Wait here a second.

I thought you might not

I thought you might not

want to go through with it.

I didn't sell them.

I kept them.

Father.

I think I've found her.

and so my

And so my

ultimate mission began.

my relationship

my relationship

with the earth female, maria,

with the earth female, maria,

progressed well

progressed well

when after extensive research,

when after extensive research,

I impressed her

I impressed her

with my vast knowledge

with my vast knowledge

of human courting rituals.

Of human courting rituals.

What?

What?

do you see your dad

do you see your dad

a lot then?

A lot then?

not in person though.

Not in person though.

On skype?

On skype?

Yeah, that sort of thing.

- Yeah, that sort of thing.

- For the first

For the first

time, I experienced

time, I experienced

how earthlings co-existed

how earthlings co-existed

within conventional

within conventional

human relationships.

Human relationships.

No fish.

No fish.

No dairy.

No dairy.

No wheat.

No wheat.

No soya.

No soya.

And no latex.

- And no latex.

- It was good.

It was good.

Oh no.

Oh no.

I don't eat rice.

I don't eat rice.

The courting phase

the courting phase

of human relations is expensive.

Of human relations is expensive.

You need lots of

you need lots of

what they call money.

What they call money.

And to get money,

and to get money,

you need what they call a job.

You need what they call a job.

It's like slavery, I suppose,

it's like slavery, I suppose,

except you can get fired.

Humans have a saying.

Honesty is the best policy.

Honesty is the best policy.

But my studies show

but my studies show

that the way to succeed

that the way to succeed

in their society

in their society

is to tell your superiors

is to tell your superiors

exactly what they want to hear.

Exactly what they want to hear.

Well joe.

Well joe.

With all your

with all your

computer experience,

computer experience,

I think we'll have you running

I think we'll have you running

the daily metrics report

the daily metrics report

on paradite on cross reference

on paradite on cross reference

with all the subsiduent systems

with all the subsiduent systems

across the global platform,

across the global platform,

and then use those to calculate

and then use those to calculate

the disbursements

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