Eastern Plays

Mr. Dimitar Jelev

is running for mayor of Triaditsa.

Hello, Mr. Jelev.

You still here?

I talked to people in the neighborhood.

Don't you hear me?

Why aren't you at school?

I have class this afternoon.

I have also come to realize

that people need change.

Come on, I'm sick of waiting for you.

Too cool, you shaved it.

Man, I can't do it.

I gotta go to school.

Are you kidding me?

No, I have a test today.

You're crazy.

Kitty, you want a drag?

How long are we gonna wait?

What did he say?

You know why...

there are no Arabs in Star Trek?

Why?

'Cause it takes place in the future.

You get it?

Yeah.

You never laugh!

Lvan got kicked out last night.

My wife voted as well.

I told her it was so damn stupid.

Why do you send text messages?

The results are rigged.

F***ing Music Idol!

Beans and a beer.

For me, beer,

chicken soup and bread.

Hi, ltso.

Hello.

Yeah, yeah.

With Georgi.

Georgi, from the neighborhood.

From the block.

Yeah, you know him.

We have to join them at the "Rally".

Who was it?

Drega.

See how I got f***ed up.

Some rednecks from the provinces!

I got drunk and woke up

with these guns and flags on me.

F***ing a**holes,

they really f***ed me up!

Don't look at that, it's crap.

Why? This is cool.

Cool? No one's gonna get that.

I think it's cool.

Get an eagle

or a dog with a cross.

What kind of dog?

A dog or two, or three.

With some crosses, I don't know...

Come on, let's go.

Ok, if you don't want to do it.

You guys want your d*cks pierced?

Ltso!

How you doing, buddy?

It's been a thousand years!

What's up?

I'm ok.

It's been ages!

Since the Art Academy.

You working?

Yeah, making furniture.

I mean, on your own stuff.

Let's go and see it.

I was gonna have a beer, but, ok.

It's a five minute walk.

We'll grab a beer later.

Why'd you come back?

Don't you like living in Holland?

I wanna try my luck here.

In Bulgaria? Are you crazy?

I'm divorced. I have two daughters.

Rumpy is a total mess.

I asked him to lend me 50 leva.

He was dropping cigarette ash

all over his car.

He almost crushed a fag

on my forehead.

Come on in.

What's up?

Hi.

Roommates... It's the worse.

Very cool.

This is my heart.

There's another one over there.

Adam and Lilith.

Great!

Bravo.

Let's do something together.

Sure.

In Holland.

Forget about Holland. Let's do it here.

Hurry up. It's getting late.

I f***ed up!

Why did they wrap you up

with that plastic?

So you f***ed up, big deal!

Come on!

- I'm going home.

- Why?

'Cause my father'll get pissed off.

Are you crazy?

What do I tell Drega?

That your dad doesn't want you out at night?

Whatever.

What's up?

What's up?

You tell me.

Who's that?

Georgi, from the hood.

Don't you remember?

You remember?

Yeah.

You look like Rambo with that haircut.

Rambo has long hair.

Look at his fingers.

Are you a piano player or what?

No.

What? A tennis player?

Kinda.

You know that guy...

Ivo the Cork?

Lvo the Cork.

I know a guy named lvo, but he's tall.

They don't call him the Cork

'cause he's short, but...

'cause he shoved a champagne cork

up a transvestite's arse.

For real?

That's what they say.

Have you tried with a cork?

No, but I think I know the guy.

Who? The transvestite or the Cork?

The Cork.

Can you find him for me?

I can try.

It's nice and quiet here.

It's boring.

It's boring, but there's no one around.

It's great.

Baking their asses.

While I bust my ass in that woodwork shop.

Let's find a workshop

and do something together.

Come on!

We'll call the others.

It'll cost a lot of money.

We'll split the rent

I'm all for it.

I really wanna do it.

Hi!

This is Niki.

Sex!

What?

Nikolina. Niki.

Nice to meet you.

Itso...

A friend from the Academy.

No. Design.

It's the same.

I knew you'd say that.

I want a beer too.

Can't you talk?

One beer.

What do you do?

I study theater

with professor Danailov.

She talks like a radio show host.

- Cool. Which year?

- Second.

It's very cool. We do fragments.

Fragments? What's that?

She can't really express herself.

Itso!

What about you?

- He already told you: Design.

- Yes, design.

I'll ask some friends.

Perfect.

But don't count on it in the city.

It can be elsewhere.

That's a great idea!

Awesome.

Itso dreams of making a living off his art

instead of working with those toxic sprays.

He probably told you.

Thanks.

What do you do?

Design.

Between 2003 and 2005,

Since 2005,

that surface has been multiplied by 100.

Why are you back so late?

Young man, I don't approve this.

Wait.

The Prime Minister announced

that all Sapard projects would be verified.

Goshe, is that you?

Stop calling him Goshe.

What?

Georgi!

We aren't gonna wait for you.

What happened to your hair?

You look like a monkey.

I asked him the same thing.

But he won't say anything.

As if I were to blame.

When did you ask me?

There's no salt.

Why are you so late, you little sh*t?

You know what time you need to be home.

You need a good thrashing to grow up.

Goshe, how was school today?

Ltso. Hi.

How are you?

Super, but I'm late for work.

- What was your number?

- 187.

I'm thinking of cutting it down, but...

You should.

I gotta talk to the doctor first.

I can't pee.

Just a little bit.

- Could you let the water run.

- Ok. Come on.

That'll do.

Is that you?

Hi!

What's up, ltso?

I'm bored.

Let's go out.

Why not?

Obviously, you forgot.

What?

Today's my birthday.

I'm such an idiot.

I wish you the best.

Thanks.

And get rid of that clown.

What clown?

What are you talking about?

Christo...

Are you listening to me?

I'm talking about me.

You need someone better.

I reserved a table for dinner

and I want to enjoy the evening.

Not fight with you, for once.

OK.

Good evening. Are you ready to order?

Beer.

- What kind?

- Bulgarian

We don't have Bulgarian.

- You got Swedish?

- Yes, we do.

A Swedish beer?

Any kind.

What about you?

Don't you want to eat something?

I can't read the menu. It's in English.

And bread!

Is it good?

There's no salt.

Itso, people go to restaurants

to eat and to talk.

Clearly, we've run out of things to say.

What?

Talk.

What is wrong with you?

What are you missing?

Salt.

And pepper.

Why do we have to have fun?

Because it's my birthday.

Big deal!

One more beer!

Goddammit!

The prices seem ok.

What are you having?

I don't know, maybe a salad.

- Are we having wine?

- I'm not drinking.

I'll have a glass of red wine.

It's nice here.

And the people look ok.

It's a quiet city.

Compared to Istanbul, everywhere is.

'Cause you've never been to China.

Please, don't talk to me about China.

You know the Chinese eat everything.

They even eat Tibetans!

One country conquering another?

Don't be so naive. It suits everyone.

Who is everyone?

The big players.

The States can't do much

without China.

Let's change the subject.

How's your dish?

It's delicious.

I wonder what

the ordinary Chinese thinks of Tibet?

Is it black pepper?

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