Eight Legged Freaks Page #3

HARLAN (V.O.)

Isn’t this just your latest get-

rich quick scheme?

At one end is the Prosperity Mall. A huge windowless

rectangle in the sand. Permanent signs tout the many

outlet stores inside: Victoria’s Secret, Home and Garden

Supplies, Sport Chalet, etc. Hand-painted signs reveal:

"GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE. EVERYTHING MUST GO. FINAL

CLOSE OUT." On the roof of the mall is a very tall radio

antenna.

HARLAN (V.O.)

Your mall has more employees than

customers.

INT. PICKUP TRUCK (TOWN, MAIN STREET) -DAY

Chris smiles as he listens to the RADIO.

(CONTINUED)

14.

CONTINUED:

WADE (V.O.)

I may have overestimated the need

for 100,000 square feet of outlet

shopping.

EXT. BEVERLY’S HOUSE -DAY

BEVERLY (40’s) is tending to her garden as she listens to

a transistor radio.

HARLAN (V.O.)

And your ostrich ranch?

WADE (V.O.)

If the government subsidies hadn’t

dried up, I’d still be rolling in

cash.

EXT. HARLAN’S TRAILER (MAIN STREET, TOWN) -DAY

An airstream at the far end of town. Signs identify it

as:
"FREEDOM RADIO." A brand new humvee is parked out

front.

INT. HARLAN’S TRAILER -DAY

Walls decorated with clippings about aliens, monsters,

and conspiracies. Two men sit at a home built

transmitter.

HARLAN GRIFFITH (40s) wears an "Aliens Go Home!" T-

shirt. He eats from a box of Frosted Flakes and drinks

Jolt cola.

WADE HALE (40s) is the mayor of Prosperity. A slick-

haired dandy who looks more like a Vegas lounge singer

than a Mayor.

WADE:

With one phone call I could put

together a deal that would make us

all very rich.

HARLAN:

They say money doesn’t buy

happiness.

WADE:

They probably don’t have any.

15.

INT. POLICE CAR (HIGHWAY) -DAY

Sam and her kids listen to the radio.

WADE (V.O.)

Money pays for kids to go to

college. It pays the mortgage.

INT. DINER (MAIN STREET, TOWN) -DAY

An attractive waitress on roller-skates. A harried CHEF.

Locals chow down. The RADIO BLARES in the b.g.

WADE (V.O.)

It puts food on the table.

Haven’t the people of this town

lived hand-to-mouth for long

enough?

INT. BARBERSHOP (MAIN STREET, TOWN) -DAY

FLOYD and LEROY are the Jurassic era barbers. Floyd cuts

Leroy’s hair. The two men listen to the RADIO.

WADE (V.O.)

We’re all gonna die in this hell

hole.

FLOYD:

Yeah, of boredom.

INT. POLICE STATION -DAY

DEPUTY PETE sits with his feet up on the desk reading

Playstation magazine. He listens to the RADIO.

WADE (V.O.)

Wouldn’t it be nice not to worry

about surviving retirement? Or

taking a shot at that life-long

dream?

INT. HARLAN’S TRAILER -DAY

WADE:

Think about it, Harlan, you could

buy a commercial transmitter and

start broadcasting to a national

audience.

HARLAN:

It would be nice to get the

message out. Let people know the

aliens walk among us.

16.

INT. PICKUP TRUCK -DAY

Chris slows to a stop in front of the McCormick and Son

Mining Company. This stately edifice was once the

driving force behind the local economy.

WADE (V.O.)

If Chris McCormick refuses to sell

his mines. The rest of us are out

of luck.

Chris frowns.

INT. POLICE CAR (HIGHWAY) -DAY

WADE (V.O.)

I don’t think it’s fair for one

person to wield that much power.

But he’s just like his father.

Selfish. Greedy. And more than a

little bit nuts.

SAM:

Uh-oh.

Sam flips on the SIREN and accelerates.

INT. DINER -DAY

The locals stop eating and look toward the radio.

WADE (V.O.)

That family has been digging in

those tunnels since the twenties.

If there was something down there,

don’t you think they would have

found it by now?

INT. BARBERSHOP -DAY

Floyd and Leroy stare at the radio.

WADE (V.O.)

Common sense does not apply to

crazy people.

INT. PICKUP TRUCK -DAY

WADE (V.O.)

Might as well be chasing a

leprechaun’s pot of gold at the

end of the rainbow.

(CONTINUED)

17.

CONTINUED:

Chris is furious as he PEELS OUT and speeds toward

Harlan’s.

INT. DINER -DAY

The locals watch Chris’s pickup speed by.

WADE (V.O.)

... lunatics...

INT. BARBERSHOP -DAY

Floyd and Leroy watch Chris speed by.

WADE (V.O.)

... certifiably nuts...

INT. POLICE CAR -(MAIN STREET, TOWN) -DAY

As Sam pulls into town. She sees Chris skid to a stop in

front of Harlan’s trailer. He leaps out of his pickup.

WADE (V.O.)

... at the very least...

INT. HARLAN’S TRAILER -DAY

Chris yanks the door open in time to hear...

WADE:

... those McCormicks are just

plain-old dumb.

Wade stands up to protest. But it’s too late. Chris

punches him in the nose. The mayor tumbles back.

CHRIS:

I’ve warned you not to talk about

my family!

HARLAN:

We have a surprise guest in the

studio.

Chris drags Wade to his feet, shoving him against the

wall.

CHRIS:

My family built this town!

(CONTINUED)

18.

CONTINUED:

WADE:

Am I supposed to be grateful?

Chris draws back his fist for another shot. Sam runs in

and grabs him from behind.

SAM:

That’s enough!

CHRIS:

Stay out of this, Sam!

She manhandles Chris toward the door.

EXT. HARLAN’S TRAILER -DAY

Practically the entire town has gathered outside. Sam

drags Chris through the door. Wade and Harlan are close

behind.

CHRIS:

Did you hear what he said?

SAM:

I heard.

WADE:

I want him locked up!

SAM:

Let’s all calm down.

Wade tries to take advantage of the assembled audience.

WADE:

We have no economy! People are

barely scraping by! And now we’ve

been offered the deal of a

lifetime. You don’t have the

right to stand in our way!

CHRIS:

Those mines are full of gas. One

spark in the wrong place could

blow this entire valley sky high.

Do you really want to load that

gun with toxic waste?

WADE:

Chem-Tech did seismic analysis,

vapor checks, groundwater reads,

soil sampling. They found

isolated methane pockets, but no

benzene or hydrogen sulfide.

(CONTINUED)

19.

CONTINUED:

CHRIS:

How could they run tests? I

didn’t give them permission to go

into the mines.

Wade retreats toward his shiny new Hummer.

CHRIS:

I asked you a question, you greedy

son of a b*tch!

WADE:

I’m greedy?! You’re the one

keeping us down so you can search

for gold!

Chris tries to go after Wade. Sam holds him back.

SAM:

Don’t take another step.

Chris stares at her.

CHRIS:

You’re taking his side?

SAM:

I’m trying to keep the peace.

WADE:

You’re crazy! Just like your

father!

Wade drives off in his humvee. The crowd begins to

disperse.

CHRIS:

(sotto)

He wasn’t crazy.

SAM:

It’s okay.

Chris heads off to his truck. Sam watches him go. Her

eyes drifting down his body. Ashley steps up beside her

mom.

ASHLEY:

Maybe you’re not gay after all.

SAM:

What are you talking about?

(CONTINUED)

20.

CONTINUED:

ASHLEY:

You can’t take your eyes off his

butt.

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