Eight Legged Freaks Page #8

Bret leaps onto his MOTORCYCLE and FIRES it UP. Several

more jumping spiders bound across the parking lot.

BRET:

Ride!

The kids scramble, leaping onto their bikes. One rider

is picked off by a spider. The others kick up rooster

tails as they accelerate away. The spiders chase them

into the dunes.

EXT. SAND DUNES -DAY

A wasteland on the outskirts of town. The sandy waves

are "surfed" by the noisy MOTORCYCLES. The jumping

spiders keep after them, leaping a dozen feet in a single

bound.

A biker is ripped off a motorcycle. The BIKE CRASHES.

Larry ends up with a jumper on his bike. Another biker

tries to kick it off, managing to knock the critter into

the motorcycle’s spokes. The spider gets munched. But

then the courageous biker crashes and is set upon by a

hungry jumper.

Larry continues riding. But a spider lands on his back

and sinks fangs into his spine. Larry yells bloody

murder.

(CONTINUED)

44.

CONTINUED:

Bret sees Larry go down in a cloud of gore and sand.

Bret is the only human left. A jumper comes after him in

mid-air. Bret does an X-Games style rocket air, kicking

backward with booted legs. He knocks the spider away and

keeps on riding.

EXT. HIGHWAY -DAY

Three familiar trucks cruise down the highway. This time

they are devoid of any toxic waste cargo.

INT. THIRD TRUCK -HIGHWAY -DAY

Pig Pen stares fixedly at the endless road ahead of him.

SELF-HELP TAPE (V.O.)

I will live every moment of my

life as if it were my last.

PIG PEN:

I will live every moment of my

life as if it were my last.

Suddenly Bret Hale wheelies across the road. A jumping

spider explodes against the windshield. Spider guts

splatter everywhere. Pig Pen screams as he JAMS on the

BRAKES.

EXT. HIGHWAY -DAY

The TRUCK jack-knifes into a line of telephone poles.

Knocking them over and rolling multiple times before

EXPLODING. Several jumping spiders are caught in the

blast. Bret Hale rides on with several more jumpers

behind.

INT. PALMER HOUSE -MIKE’S ROOM -DAY

The black and white classic: Tarantula, plays over an

old TV and VCR. Mike is at his computer, downloading a

spider encyclopedia into his PDA. A message flashes

across the screen: CONNECTION LOST. Mike picks up the

telephone.

MIKE:

Hello? Hello?

The line is dead.

45.

EXT. DESERT -DAY

Bret rides into a dead-end canyon with the spiders very

close behind. Bret steers for the mouth of a hillside

mine shaft.

INT HORIZONTAL MINE SHAFT -DAY

Bret speeds inside. He looks over his shoulder to check

for his pursuers, they’re gone. Bret looks relieved. He

faces forward as... whack! A support beam knocks him

from his bike. The bike continues on into the tunnel

alone. From the sound of things it travels pretty far

before crashing.

Bret lies on the ground as dust settles onto his face.

He looks up at a support beam which begins to crack.

Bret moves clear just as the ceiling caves in, sealing

him in the mine.

EXT. MAIN STREET (TOWN) -DAY

Several locals put up more signs for missing pets.

INT. DINER/EXT. MAIN STREET (TOWN) -DAY

Harlan is kibitzing with Travis. Pete and Emma console

each other over dessert. Wade sits alone at a table for

two. The attractive WAITRESS on roller-skates give him a

fresh beer.

WAITRESS:

The phones went down for some

reason. Maybe that’s why Bret

didn’t call. Did you want to go

ahead and order?

WADE:

Just give me the usual.

WAITRESS:

One ostrich steak, comin’ up.

Wade reacts glumly to the word "ostrich."

INT. MUSEUM -KITCHEN -DAY

Gladys smokes as she puts together the fixings for a

large meal. She has a cookbook out. Pots and pans.

Chris enters. Gladys quickly drops her cigarette in the

disposal.

(CONTINUED)

46.

CONTINUED:

GLADYS:

What are you doing home?

CHRIS:

Need some rat traps.

GLADYS:

Try the basement.

CHRIS:

What is all this?

GLADYS:

I wanted to surprise you with a

special dinner. Turkey De La

Gladys.

CHRIS:

I’ll have mine without Nicotine.

GLADYS:

Not as good that way.

Chris goes through a nearby door to the basement.

INT. MUSEUM -BASEMENT -DAY

Chris comes downstairs. He rummages through some junk.

comes up with several rat traps. He turns around to

discover an odd hole in the wall. He ventures over for a

look.

CHRIS:

Rats...

Chris leans into the hole, his jacket restricts his

entry.

Chris pulls out of the hole, standing to reveal a large

male tarantula on his back. Chris is oblivious as he

takes off his jacket. The coat lands in a heap atop the

spider.

Chris gets back down and places one of the rat traps in

the hole. He doesn’t notice the jacket moving behind

him.

Chris backs out of the hole. He picks up his jacket.

The spider is gone. He grabs his traps and heads

upstairs.

47.

INT. MUSEUM -DAY

Chris passes through the kitchen. He eyes Gladys warily.

CHRIS:

Have you been smoking?

GLADYS:

No.

Smoke pours out of her nostrils.

CHRIS:

Gladys...

GLADYS:

Get back to work. I’ll see you

tonight.

Chris starts out.

GLADYS:

Sam called for you.

Chris hesitates.

GLADYS:

She wants you to come by the

station.

CHRIS:

She really has it in for me.

GLADYS:

Oh please.

CHRIS:

What?

GLADYS:

You two should just sleep together

and get it over with.

CHRIS:

Me and Sam... Hook up...

GLADYS:

I may be older than electricity,

but I used to be a nice-looking

piece of tail.

CHRIS:

Too much information.

(CONTINUED)

48.

CONTINUED:

GLADYS:

I’m not kidding. I got more

action than those chicks on VIP.

So when I tell you Sam thinks your

butt is U.S.D.A. choice...

CHRIS:

This is where I throw up.

GLADYS:

Don’t tell me you don’t think

she’s a fox.

Chris mulls this over. Testing his own feelings. He

opens his mouth to ask another question. And then heads

out.

GLADYS:

See you for dinner.

Gladys doesn’t notice the basement DOOR CREAK open

slightly.

INT. POLICE STATION -DAY

Sam is on the phone at her desk.

SAM:

Nothing yet. I’m sorry. We’re

still trying to get...

Chris enters.

SAM:

Let me call you back.

(hangs up)

This has been one crazy day.

We’ve got missing pets, dead

ostriches. God only knows what’s

next.

CHRIS:

I’m sorry about yesterday. Wade

is... He knows how to push my

buttons.

SAM:

I wanted to ask you...

CHRIS:

On a date?

Sam freezes for a second. Chris laughs.

(CONTINUED)

49.

CONTINUED:

CHRIS:

I’m kidding. What did you want to

ask?

SAM:

Have you noticed anything strange

in the mines?

CHRIS:

Define strange.

SAM:

I had spiders in my house. Hector

had roaches in his basement. Some

mice...

CHRIS:

How about stampeding rats?

SAM:

Were they running away from

something?

CHRIS:

Could have been. Never saw them

do that before. I guess it

qualifies as strange.

Sam thinks this over.

CHRIS:

Sam... Do you want to go out

sometime?

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