Ex-Lady

---

I'm sorry, but consider yourselves

evicted from the premises.

Why, the evening's getting going.

I'm afraid we're being

politely ordered to leave.

If you say, "politely"...

- I'll get my things.

- Alright.

My dear, you better wake your husband.

He seems a little "hors de combat. "

Wake up, darling.

Oh... good evening, all.

Must we really go?

Hate to drive you away, but I've

got lots of work to do tomorrow.

Tomorrow's Sunday.

That's the only way I know it's Sunday:

I do twice as much work as other days.

- What are you working on now, Helen?

Illustrating that What's-His-Name's

book for children.

I finished that. I'm doing a

cover now for the Home Journal.

- Ladies'?

- Ladies'.

- Let's go.

- I laugh every time I think of it...

- Goodnight, Helen. -The subject

of the lecture was La Vivandi're...

Well, to make a long story short,

after the lecture was over...

...Aunt Lucinda went up to the lecturer

and told him how much she enjoyed it.

Good night Helen. Come over and see us

soon. Pick any night you want.

- Well, the old gentleman decided...

- Soon as I get breathing time I'll call.

Well? Are you going, or coming?

I'd like to stay a while,

- Nick, I've got to get to bed. -So what?

You know I'm not that kind of a girl.

- I know you're nice. -And is

that being nice? Go on home.

You know, something's got to be done

about you and me sooner or later.

Goodnight, Nick!

- Is that you? -Who

else do you expect?

Gosh, it was a long evening.

Darling, we need such evenings. It makes

things you love not go stale on you.

And what things do you love?

My work.

Is that all?

Yes.

Yes?

Yes.

Oh, come on. Help me clean up.

- Must you really work

tomorrow? -No way out.

I promised the cover for Monday.

Ah, confound the cover!

Yes. But don't confound the 300 dollars.

You're a successful woman.

I ought not to like it.

You're a pretty successful man.

I ought not to like it.

[In unison:
]

"I'm a man. "

What a boring evening.

Oh. Boring?

Its always boring when we're not alone.

Say:
I'm hungry. You want

to turn in right away?

No. Only said that. I'm hungry

too. Let's see what we've got.

You know... I'm just about

fed up with sneaking in.

- Sneaking?

- Yes, sneaking.

Let's get married. So I'll have

the right to be with you.

What do you mean, "right"? I

don't like the word "right. "

Oh, let's not quibble

about words.

No, I'm not quibbling.

"Right" means something.

No one has any rights

about me, except me.

How about a Welsh rarebit?

- You know my weakness.

- No. Tell me.

Rarebits.

Hello, Father. What brings you here?

Excuse me a minute. I'm cold.

I want to put something on.

Wait outside. It's better you

should not listen to this.

Where's Mother?

No use shutting the door. I saw him.

Cheap. Cheap! My daughter, cheap!

I'm not cheap.

I just don't want to make an unholy

drama out of this. There's no drama.

I had heard, but I didn't believe.

Now I see it. My daughter. My child.

Oh, don't let's get dramatic about

this. Don't let's start arguing.

We've been all over this.

I don't believe in what you believe.

That's all. I don't want to get married.

- I don't want to get married.

- You don't want? YOU don't want?

The whole world is wrong! You are right!

We've been all over this 100 times.

If you came in here to start a scene

or make an argument, I wish you'd go.

- Alright, I'll go. But

first... -What are you doing?

I'll show you what I am doing!

Don, I'm sorry.

That's alright.

I want to talk to this lump alone.

- Come on out, Don. -Let me talk

to him. I want to talk to him.

- Alone! -Yes, alone.

Do you mind, Helen?

You dirty, low...

Can't you skip all that? I want to

talk this over with you, reasonably.

Reasonably! Reasonably! Better

I shouldn't talk to you at all.

Better I should do what a father

ought to do:
I should kill you!

I bring up a child to be a good girl, to

hope someday she will meet a good man.

She should be married.

She should have children.

When comes along a scoundrel,

a dirty, low scamp!

There's no use talking

like that, Mr. Bauer.

Helen and I don't feel

the way you do about it.

We're in love with each other,

and we don't want to get married.

You're hopelessly

old-fashioned, Mr. Bauer.

Old-fashioned!

That's a good word. That's a compliment.

Why, thank you! What's

good is old-fashioned?

- You dirty, low... -This isn't

going to get us anywhere.

- Come. -Adolph, maybe... -Come!

Let's have breakfast. I'm starved.

Let's talk.

- Let's eat. -No,

let's talk.

Let's eat and talk.

Helen, I'm willing to kid about this,

but we can't go on kidding about it.

- We ought to get married.

- "Ought... " Ouch!

Yes, ought. We ought to get married.

There isn't a reason in

the world why we don't.

And you call my father old-fashioned!

It isn't that I'm stuffy,

Helen. I've been around.

Just a playboy.

Now, you know what I mean.

The funny part of it is, when

we first met, when, we, uh...

Dash, dash, asterisk...

I didn't feel this way about it at all.

I think if you had suggested marriage...

...at the time, I'd have run

rapidly in the other direction.

Now, I know you're going to say

this is sentimental, Helen.

But I like to feel we belong

to each other forever and ever.

I want to marry you.

Aww, Don, we've been over

it. Over it and over it.

I went away from home to be on my own.

I don't want to be like my mother,

a yes-woman for some man.

I want to be a person on my own.

If I like to live a certain way, and

have a certain kind of furniture...

...do a certain kind of work, and

wear a certain kind of clothes...

I want to do it. And not have somebody

tell me I ought to do something else.

No one is going to tell you.

Oh, yes you are. If you're married.

That's what being married means.

You must do what the other person

wants. You must please them.

Marriage means... oh, I've said

it 50 times, Don. It's dull.

I'm not going to say it again. Toast?

- Helen, I feel strongly

about this. -Stop it.

It's either marriage, or...

It's dull!

Where are you going?

It's dull!

You're just as stubborn as

your father. Just as stubborn.

We have a different sense of

values. I don't want babies.

When I'm 40, I'll think of babies.

In the meantime, there are 20 years

in which I want to be the baby...

...and play with my toys, and have

a good time playing with them.

A career.

Oh, it isn't just that. Sure, I want

to do good work. But it isn't that.

I want to stay young for a while & have

a good time. And not be dull and set.

I don't want to be a wife.

And I do want to be a husband.

Wants to be a husband!

I don't see anything funny about that.

I want to marry you, and

that's all there is to it.

Alright, that's all there is to it.

Alright, that's all there is to it.

Oh, don't be a fool.

Be a fool!

- Hello, Helen.

- Hello!

Oh, you don't want to see me.

Well, this is strictly business.

Somebody told me you're a good artist.

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