Faces

---

- Anyone inside?

- Not yet, sir.

- Good morning, Mr. Forst.

- Good morning, Mr. Forst.

Good morning, Mr. Forst.

- I have some correspondence

and some papers for you to sign.

- Don't bother me with that stuff.

- Would you like some coffee?

- No.

- You look lousy.

- You're not in a good mood?

- Anything I can do for you?

- I'll give you a list of my maladies.

You better give me a cup of coffee.

I don't want to yawn in Mrs. Miniver's face.

- Yes, sir.

- Hmm?

[No Audible Dialogue]

- Here you are.

- Will you take this thing out of my mouth?

- Okay.

- Thanks.

- Good morning.

- [All] Good morning, Miss Whiteford.

Hello, Nita.

How'd they get you out of bed?

Aw, shut up.

Harry. Oh, you know Harry Selfrine.

[Forst] Do I know Harry Selfrine?

Do I know Harry.

Good morning.

- Jim Mortensen.

- [Whiteford] Nice boy.

Kazmier, Edward.

Do you know Richard Forst, our manager?

Hello, darling. Lang. L-A-N-G.

How are you, dear?

[Kisses Hand]

- Good morning, Mr. Draper.

- [Whiteford] All right.

When I was a kid,

we used to play a game called...

"Your mother wears army shoes."

I'm not your mother.

Sit down.

- [Laughing]

- Do you know Frederick P. Draper?

Thank you, Emily Dickinson.

- Here you are.

- Thank you very much.

Thank you.

What are you gonna

sell us this time, Harry?

Money.

- Actually, it's a very good film.

- We call it the, uh...

Dolce vita

of the commercial field.

- Is that so?

- I don't mean to insinuate it's a crude film.

We were trying to capture

several approaches.

- WhatJim means is that we really

- No, no. That's not what I mean at all.

We were talking facts and figures

until we practically went out of our minds.

Losses, gains, ratings, schmatings.

You can lose your mind

if you keep analyzing things like that.

Then we came up with

an impressionistic document that shocks.

- Is that so?

- I don't think it so much shocks as it's honest.

It's honest,

but it's a good piece in itself.

So, you see, we're a a little nervous

about hitting you with this.

Oh, now, they've got nothing

to be nervous about.

It's a shot in the dark,

but it's strong and it's attractive.

It better be

better than the last one, Harry.

I think I'll loan you my sleeping pills.

You know, I have insomnia...

and I stay awake all night looking at pictures,

worrying about pictures.

I walk all over the place.

- Let's see it,J.P.

- I'd rather hear 'em talk about it again.

- [Man] We'll talk about it later.

- [Forst]J.P.

All right, Arnold. Roll it.

[Man Making Kissing Sound]

[Man] You're after my money, huh?

[Makes Kissing Sound]

[Chuckles]

You're not gonna drink this?

Too bad.

- Never let good liquor go to waste.

# Never let it go to waste #

- Oh!

# Never let it ##

Ida. Ida, I adore you.

Never let good liquor go to waste.

- Arrivederci! Ciao!

- [Man] Go on. Beat it.

- "Scusa pleasa." Bye-bye.

- [Man] So long, sucker.

I'll drive. I'll drive.

Give me the keys. Give me the keys.

Give me the keys.

I'll drive.

[Man Humming]

[Glove Compartment Opens]

[Engine Starts]

[Laughing]

[Chattering]

[Forst]

Don't make any noise, Jeannie. Here, Freddie.

- [Yells]

- No, no, Freddie.

- Drink, drink, drink.

- Freddie.

- [Jeannie] Shh, shh.

- Drink, drink, drink, drink.

- Come on.

- No, I don't care if we wake 'em.

We'll get 'em all a drink.

Let everybody come in and have a drink.

[Laughing]

- [Chimes Jingle, Door Bangs]

- Shh. Shh, shh, shh.

- Shh. Shh.

- Ha!

- # I got drunk tonight #

- Shh!

## [Muffled Singing]

# I got drunk tonight

like I never got drunk before #

#When I'm drunk I'm happy as can be #

# I am a member of the souse family #

#The souse family is the best family #

#That ever came over

from old Germany ##

[Yelling]

Oh. Oh, boy.

- [Knocking]

- [Jabbering]

- Shh!

- Ah!

# Deck the halls with boughs of holly #

# Fa, la, la, la, la

la, la, la, la #

- What are you doing?

- # 'Tis the season to bejolly #

#Fa, la, la, la, la

la, la, la, la #

#Troll the ancient yuletide carols #

- # Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ##

- [Forst Laughing]

What the hell are we doing here?

[Laughing]

[Jeannie Sighs]

There's just

All of a sudden...

we just joined the clan

of I-don't-give-a-damners.

Wake up, and have a good time before

the bad fairy comes and makes it midnight!

Say, listen. If there's anything

I can't stand, it's a bad fairy.

What the hell do you know

about Cinderella?

Look, now. Sit down.

I wanna tell you something.

Just sit down. Sit down.

Don't let this sophisticated

exterior fool you.

I believe in Aesop's Fables

and Walt Disney.

All right, Freddie.

Okay. All right.

"All right" my left eyeball.

We met at a bar.

- Right, Jeannie?

- Right.

And it was love at first sight.

Right, Jeannie?

- Right.

- We were thrown out by Morey.

But we had laughs.

- Right?

- Right!

Shut up. Who asked ya?

Listen...

I think...

Forst is a holier-than-thou.

- I am not.

- Who asked ya? Now, cool it.

You go to a psychiatrist,

don't you, Dickie?

- No, I don't.

- Well, you look Freudian.

- I never even met a psychiatrist.

- He looks like Sigmund.

- Yes, he does!

- [Freddie Laughs]

Do you know that Freud said if you go

to the bathroom, it's supposed to be sexy?

Oh! Oh! Oh!

Sick, sick, sick, sick! Sick!

[Freddie Laughing]

Come on, now.

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute!

What the hell are we talking about?

- [Jeannie] Who cares?

- Who cares?

Yeah. For a minute or two we act stupid.

We have a good time.

Who does it hurt? I mean,

who makes up the rules anyway?

I mean, always play it cool,

always put everybody down.

Standing in a corner looking out the side

of your eye, see if anybody's lookin' at ya.

- Listen. Hell, fellas. I'm 28

- [Forst] Uh-oh! Uh-oh!

I'm 23 years old,

and it's time for me to forget myself, right?

Right!

[Muttering]

- Down with the middle class!

- Right.

- Down with the white-collar workers!

- Down, down, down!

- Down, down with the

- I'll give you the swiftest pain in the behind

that was ever invented!

Down with the, uh, uh,

lecturers and do-gooders.

- You know who I hate?

- Down with squealers.

- On television!

- I hate cheap people.

Down with hospitals that keep people

waiting until they get paid.

- Right.

- Some hospitals are okay.

Down with hospitals!

- Don't bully me!

- Don't bully her!

- You shut up.

- Down with gossip columns.

[Forst]

And to hell with politics. It stinks!

Kill the finks for something!

Down with Sunday schools!

[Cackling]

[Jeannie]

I like Sunday schools.

- [Cackling]

- Hey, I got one.

- [Forst] What is it?

- Down with friendship. I think it's phony.

[Yells]

Attagirl!

Oh, wait a minute. You don't know

what you're talking about.

Fr-Friendship Friendship is a tradition.

Friendship is useful.

- Dickie, I got the most terrible friends.

- I don't care.

- Sometimes you need a friend.

- So buy a dog!

Oh, I'm talkin' about us, stupid!

Why are you so stupid?

You know how long

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