Fanny by Gaslight

---

Cockles and

mussels alive alive-o

Alive alive-o

Alive alive-o

Cockles and mussels alive alive-o

Cockles and mussels alive alive-o

Alive alive-o...

Catch this one.

Cockles and mussels alive alive-o

- Butterfingers.

- You made me miss it.

Come on. Throw it to me.

Here you are. Harder.

Higher this time, higher.

That's no good, silly. Watch me.

- Now look what you've done.

- It's your fault for not catching.

- Go and get it.

- I daren't go down there.

Why not? The place belongs

to your papa, doesn't it?

Yes, but you know I'm

not allowed down there.

You can do anything you

like on your birthday.

- You're afraid.

- I'm not.

- Yes, you are.

- I am not.

There.

Well, anyway, you're

afraid to look inside.

You're a cowardy, cowardy custard.

All right.

Well, I'll be...

Look what's here.

Hello, duckie. What do you want?

- Nothing, thank you.

- Then take it and hop it.

Shut up. Come in, dearie,

and have a sweetie.

Ooh, thank you. It's my birthday today.

Is it?

- You'd better have two.

- Ooh, thank you. I'll keep one for Lucy.

- Who's Lucy?

- She's my friend. She's very pretty.

Fanny's gone down there

and she hasn't come back.

Papa is giving me a hoop.

It's supposed to be a surprise

but I peeped into the cupboard.

Fanny? Miss Fanny?

What are you doing? You know

you're not allowed down here.

Upstairs with you. Go on.

Go on, duckie, do as you're told.

You tell her ma to

look after her better.

She's too nice to go poking

her nose into places like this.

Go on. Up them stairs.

- Was there a ghost?

- No, silly.

Only an old woman scrubbing a floor and two

ladies with dressing gowns on. Actresses.

- How do you know?

- They told me.

Look, the fair lady gave me these.

- Who gave you them there goodies?

- The pretty lady down there.

- Don't you dare to eat 'em.

- Why not, Chunks?

- They may be poisoned.

- Oh.

Now, if I dies a violent

death, it's poisoned.

If I don't... it ain't.

It ain't.

- Buy yourself some more.

- Thank you, Chunks.

Up with you to your ma. Go on. Don't

let me catch you down there again.

- Isn't it wonderful? Nine candles.

- I shall have ten on mine.

You can't. You'll only be nine.

It's not fair, your

always being older than me.

Anyway, my cake'll be bigger.

You'll get on in life, Lucy.

Papa!

And how's the birthday girl, hm?

Hello, Mr Hopwood. How

do you like my new sash?

Oh, very nice.

Can't stop long. We're very busy.

The kettle's just boiling.

Sit down, all of you.

One, two, three, four...

...and one for the pot.

A gentleman to see you,

ma'am. A Mr Seymore.

- Where have you put him, Mary?

- In the morning room, ma'am.

I'm sorry, Lucy, you'll have to wait

for your tea. Fanny, you come with me.

- Why?

- Go with your mother, Fanny.

- Come along, dear.

- Who is Mr Seymore?

How's business, Mr Hopwood?

Not so bad, Lucy, not so bad.

What's that place you've

got called The Shades?

- Eh?

- The Shades.

I took you at your word, you see.

So this is Fanny.

- She does you credit, ma'am.

- Thank you.

Fanny?

- I don't suppose you remember me.

- No, sir.

Mr Seymore's been in foreign parts.

- With black people, sir?

- Well, no, not exactly.

How do you like your school, my dear?

- Well...

- I think she likes her lessons, don't you?

- I don't like arithmetic.

- Neither did I.

Come and see my birthday cake.

Thank you for your invitation

but I'm afraid I can't.

Won't you stay and have tea with us?

Much as I'd like to, I have

a meeting with my chief.

They say you'll be prime

minister one of these days.

You mustn't believe all

you read in the newspapers.

I hoped it was true.

It'd make it all seem more worthwhile.

I've brought you a birthday

present. May I give it her?

Of course.

Aren't you going to say thank you?

Ooh, thank you.

When you're older, wear it

sometimes and think of the giver.

Yes.

Well, goodbye, Mrs Hopwood.

Remember me to your husband, won't you?

- Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

When I drive in Hyde Park, all the common

people will get up on their seats and watch me.

Papa, look what the gentleman gave me.

Oh, very pretty. Mm.

Lucy, look, isn't it wonderful?

Quite nice.

When I'm a famous actress, I shall

have lots and lots of jewellery.

- Much better than that.

- I don't want anything better.

Now for tea.

Oh, look.

Don't the candles look lovely?

Yes.

I bet you can't blow...

Lucy tells me Fanny's been straying

into The Shades after her ball.

She's growing up. We'll have

to send her away to school.

I suppose so.

Come on, then, Fanny.

All out at one blow.

One, two, three, blow!

- Pretty?

- You've done it beautifully, Lucy.

We must hurry.

She oughtn't to be long now.

Chunks.

One lump for luck, to give Miss Fanny a warm

welcome on her return after all these years.

- That'll be her!

- Must be. Is it?

- Yes, it's her!

- It is! Come on, Chunks.

- How much? - Half a crown and

threepence for the basket.

Here's three shillings.

You can keep the change.

Thank you, missy.

I'll give you a hand for that.

Are you just home for the holidays?

Home for good. Left school today.

Is that so? Just beginning

life, as you might say.

Yes. Isn't it wonderful?

Fanny?

Lucy!

How you've grown!

And Chunks. You haven't changed at all.

A little bit older, miss.

I'll go and tell your pa.

Mama!

Let me look at you.

How pale you are.

It's a good thing I have

come home to look after you.

We've got a lovely

supper waiting for you.

Oh, happy birthday.

Dear me, with all the

excitement I forgot.

Many happy returns of the day, darling.

- Thank you, mama.

- Come on.

Sir John's compliments, sir. Will

you take a glass of sherry with him?

- Delighted. Sir John.

- Hopwood.

Miss Fanny's arrived, sir.

- Good. I'll come straight up.

- Right, sir.

Ah, Hopwood.

I want to take a friend

down to The Shades.

Is he safe, my lord?

As a church.

I'll take you down.

- My word.

- Thank you.

Cancan

My word!

Hello, darling.

- Good evening, Hopwood.

- An honour to have you with us.

- Won't you join us? - My regret, sir.

I've a family celebration tonight.

- My daughter's come home from school.

- Daughter, eh?

I didn't know you had one.

I'll wager Hopwood doesn't put his

precious daughter in the business.

17, 18, 19 candles.

Isn't that wonderful?

I'm only 18, and I'm going to stay

18 for years and years and years.

- Oh, Papa.

- Sorry, my dear.

I was kept downstairs.

- Very pretty. - It's my

first really grown-up gown.

- And my hair's up too. Look.

- My hair's been up for years.

Very nice.

How does it feel to be let loose

from Miss Kennedy's seminary?

Wonderful. It's lovely to be home.

I never want to leave it again.

- Happy birthday, my

Happy birthday.

- Many of them, I say.

- Thank you, Chunks.

- I'll get back to work.

- Thank you, Chunks.

My love?

- What are you going to do now you're home?

- I haven't really thought yet.

I'm not good at anything

really, only sewing.

Are you still going on the stage?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes