Frances Ha Page #3

- What time you get in last night?

- Late. Like 1:
00.

Why didn't you come in

and say hi?

I'm sorry.

I thought you were asleep.

I wasn't asleep.

I heard you come in.

Then you knew

what time I got in?

I'm working on some sample skits

for Saturday Night Live.

A producer said I could probably

get a job writing for them.

- Cool.

- Such a lie.

- Guys, this is Nessa.

- [Benji] Hey.

Hello. I'm Frances.

Lev and I were gonna make

bacon-egg bagels. You want some?

Oh, no. Thanks, though.

I wanted to go to the Met...

and I have to deposit this check

and drop off my laundry.

A whole Sunday planned.

- [Lev] Ever ridden on a motorcycle?

- [Nessa] Once.

[Lev]

It's an '85 Honda Shadow VT700.

- Are you impressed?

- Very. Mm-hmm.

So why do you want

to live together?

Well, I met Benji

through my friend Sophie.

- Where is Sophie these days?

- Busy with work.

- Which Sophie?

- Sophie Levy.

Get out!

I f***ed her little brother.

Oh, you f***ed Thomas.

- Yeah.

- You f***ed who?

- How do you know her? - We went to college

together, and we're the same person.

- You're that Frances!

- But we have different hair.

That's what we say.

Yeah, I'm that Frances.

- She speaks so highly of you.

- Well, we're best friends.

She's been to my house

for Christmas three times.

- Why doesn't she go to her own house?

- She's Jewish.

- She was saying last week she loved you.

- You saw her last week?

- When did you f*** her brother? - Where

were you guys? - I met you last night.

- We were at that restaurant, Po.

- Who were you f***ing last week, Lev?

Is that a good restaurant?

Was she with -

Who was she with?

Me and Thomas and that guy

she dates, Patch.

- Double-date.

- And some girl. Lena?

- Lisa. C*nt.

- Who were you f***ing last week, Frances?

- I make love.

- Frances:
undateable.

- Aren't you a lot older than Sophie?

- No. We went to college together.

- Hmm. You seem older.

- I'm a couple months older.

Like, a lot older...

but less, like, grown up.

It's weird.

You have an older face.

But, like, you don't have

your sh*t together.

Nessa can't come from sex.

Only 69.

That's a crazy helmet.

Got to. Motorcycle law.

Can you leave that rent check?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I'll just put it on your desk.

- 950, right?

- Nope, 1,200.

[Frances]

I don't, um -

When I moved in,

we said 950.

Nope. The whole space is 4,000,

but the little room's only 1,200.

No, she's right. We said we could pay

that much until she got more cash.

Remember? Because when I do

the Christmas show...

- I'll make more because I'll be doing

ten shows a week. - Oh, right.

So we're good with 950'?

That's okay? I'm really sorry.

No prob.

Catch you on the flip side.

[Sighs]

He leaves so easily.

Well, transportation's his thing.

Bike, skateboard.

He has a car too.

I can't even get

out of the house on my feet.

You know what Virginia Woolf book

this reminds me of?

Frances:
undateable.

Want to watch a mo vie?

- Now?

- Yeah. Let's do a movie afternoon.

I already wasted the whole day.

I already feel bad.

I think it's a great day.

I ate an egg bagel

that Lev's slut made me.

I Internet-acquired three pairs

of very rare Ray-Bans.

I'm doing awesome.

I thought we were both broke.

I caved and finally took

a loan from my stepdad.

Bastard.

I need a f***ing job, though.

- What about SNL?

- Yeah, maybe.

It's gone so downhill.

Till then, it's after 3:00.

I can drink.

Let's do something fun.

- We could go to a movie.

- Movies are so expensive now.

Yeah, but you're at the movies.

I should be saving

so I can pay full rent.

Well, I'm not gonna force you.

I have to work out, at least.

I cannot get fat.

Do I look old to you?

No. Yes.

- How old?

- Older than I am?

- Older than 27?

- No.

Twenty-seven is old, though.

[Mo vie Playing On TV]

[Frances]

Isn't this place amazing?

- Is that an Eames chair?

- Yeah.

- Isn't this great?

- Total rich-kid apartment.

The boys just have good eyes.

They find stuff all the time.

Do you know who

Lev Shapiro's dad is?

He doesn't get along with his dad.

Lev and Benji are artists.

Exactly. The only people who can afford

to be artists in New York are rich.

I'm an artist.

I'm not rich.

You are rare.

We need whiskeys.

It's just, this apartment

is very... aware of itself.

Everyone who comes here loves it.

I love it.

The three of us

are hilarious together.

We're like a sitcom:

My Two Husbands.

Oh, that's great.

I'm really happy for you, Frances.

Thank you, Sophie.

Ladies.

Lev Shapiro, you know Sophie?

Of course.

Still beautiful.

- How is the publishing business?

- You know, not good.

How's sculpture?

Amazing-ng-ng.

Oh. My boyfriend likes

that artist you work for.

- Tell your boyfriend he can talk to me

if he wants to buy something. - I will.

Are we buying art now?

Is that the point we're at?

- I need to get clean. Ladies.

- [Sophie] Bye.

- Lev would totally date you.

- I have a boyfriend.

But isn't he charming

and so handsome?

You could be over here all the time.

it would be great.

Then you wouldn't have to spend

all that time with Lisa.

- Right. I could f*** him just to

not hang outwith Lisa. - [Door Opens]

Don't mind me.

I'm just trying to get your attention.

How could you not want to date him?

He's kind of magic.

Because I'm with Patch.

Patch is the kind of guy...

who buys

a black leather couch...

and is like, "I love it. "

- What are we doing with our day?

- I got to get going around 5:00.

- I thought we were hanging out.

- We are.

- All day. - I have plans with

Patch tonight. I told you.

- No, you didn't.

- Yes, I did. I texted that to you.

- No, you didn't.

- Yes, I did.

- Here.

- We're not doing that.

That's shitty.

It's not court.

- I did text you, though.

- I believe you.

- You don't have to believe me.

I did text you. - Want to see my room?

I kind of have a crush on this boy,

but his name is Georgie...

so I don't really know

how far it's gonna go.

- Can't f*** a Georgie.

- "I want you inside me, Georgie. "

- Have you been dating anyone?

- Nope.

- Oh, Frances.

- It's fine.

- What about Benji?

- Benji thinks I'm undateable.

It's really funny when he does it.

You and I are both undateable.

Guys can't handle us.

We're gonna end up spinsters.

You better break that to Patch.

Boys are easier.

Girls are passive-aggressive.

Boys are just like,

"Clean up your sh*t. "

You're still messy.

I've been busy.

No, it wasn't a criticism.

I meant it as a nice thing.

You will always be messy,

and you will always...

...look at yourself

too much in the mirror.

- When did I look at myself in the mirror?

- Always. You just were doing it.

There are so many mirrors

in this apartment.

I don't want you to change.

I like your clothes everywhere

and your mirror thing. It's sweet.

- You have stuff too.

- What?

You judge people who aren't

as moderate as you are.

- I do not.

- You do, and you don't read.

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