From Prada To Nada

- Dad!

- Dad!

Oh, my God!

Nora, you just hit me.

Don't take sides, Juanito.

I'm the one who thinks you're cute.

It'll live.

It's just a car, not a baby.

Nora, you don't hit

a new bimmer.

Mary, it'll be fine.

Pablo, that topiary

looks just like Dad.

This one's for you,

Juanito,

- and can you get the case

out of the trunk? - Yes.

- Nora?

- What?

What is this, Tijuana?

Oh, my gosh.

- Oh, my gosh, you are so slow.

- You're gonna make me drop the cake.

It's heavy, okay?

You, nina,

keep away from my stove.

- Do you need any help?

- It's not even done yet.

Oh, my God,

that is really thick stew.

For your father's birthday.

They say it brings a bride.

Well, in that case, Carmina,

you can just throw it all out.

Will you lighten up, please?

Nora!

Mary, when we're gone,

who will he have left?

Well, Mom.

Well, she's not very talkative now,

is she?

Well, she's beautiful,

and she'll never age.

Beauty is not everything.

Okay, how would you know? You're 24,

and you seriously have not been kissed.

- Okay, thanks a lot.

- You're, like, Amish.

- Really? Amish?

- Girls!

Girls, are you fighting?

On my birthday?

- Dad...

- I hope it is important.

She crashed my car.

- She did?

- Yes!

It'll cost you less than one

of your shopping sprees on Rodeo Drive.

You should go with your sister

on a spree one of these days, you know?

- See?

- See?

- Dad.

- What?

You know what? There are

more important things to do

- than going shopping with her.

- Like giving me a kiss for my birthday.

- Come on. Okay. Like dancing.

- Happy birthday.

- Like, one, two, three.

One, two, three. - Dad...

You can't dance

to tacky ranchero music.

- Why not?

- Rancheros are not tacky.

- Yes, it is.

- It's not.

A perfect funeral for him.

Even the mariachis are drunk.

Okay. It's not a criticism.

I can say that.

We are family, no?

And that's what counts.

Aurelia.

Who are they?

Do you know them?

He is your brother.

- We have a brother?

- We have a brother?

His name is Gabe, Jr.

- That's impossible.

- How?

Your father had an affair

before you were born.

Your mother forgave him.

But he's illegitimate.

Mary!

I'm sorry, I just meant...

You don't need to be sorry.

Yes, she does.

And we know what you meant.

But the will says

we get a third of his assets.

- "We"?

- Ladies, please.

The will is meaningless.

He didn't want you to know,

but Mr. Dominguez

was in bankruptcy.

Bankrupt?

No way.

Listen,

your father was a wonderful man,

but a risk-taker.

He wasn't prepared

for the economic crisis.

Okay, so what do we have?

A huge amount of debt.

Well, what about the house?

- Let us buy it.

- No.

It's not for sale.

Look, this could benefit us all.

We actually re-sell homes

for a living.

And you can stay in the house

with us, if you want to.

Until you're ready to go.

Oh, no! Not the playhouse!

I bet that's Mary.

If you stopped smoking pot,

you wouldn't be...

You do know that possession

of marijuana is illegal?

It's a silly law.

Oh?

Legalize cannabis and tax it,

create a revenue stream for the state.

Conservatives have created

a formidable opposition to it.

Well, someone has to keep us

in the dark.

Sorry,

I thought you were my sister.

Do I look like your sister?

No.

You're taller, and on time.

I'm Edward, Olivia's brother.

Nora, newly discovered sister-in-law

and law student.

Nice to meet you.

Edward?

- Oh, my God! Look at you.

- Hi.

Olivia, don't infantilize me

in front of this beautiful woman.

Have you met my brother,

the ruthless attorney?

Yes, he looks like

he could shred things.

Excuse me.

Does it really look like him?

You never met him?

Did you ever try to?

My mother told me

he abandoned us.

That's strange.

I mean,

family was so important to him.

Okay.

So, you're poor.

No more shopping.

I'd kill myself.

No high-protein diet.

Poor people only eat carbs.

Wow.

What time is it?

Sh*t, I'm late.

Sorry that I'm late.

This smells so good.

Your lips are way red.

Hi.

I'm Edward, her brother.

How is that possible?

'Cause, like, you look so nice,

and you're, like, so...

Got it. Well,

it was very nice meeting you.

Nice to meet you, too.

Edward is staying the night

with us.

Your room has the best view

of the mountains,

so he's going to use it.

Really? Well, there's not really

that much room in my bed,

but I think we can make it work.

After lunch, could you and your sister

please pack your things?

You're joking, right?

No, not at all.

I've been planning on moving you both

to the basement anyway.

I need to re-do those rooms,

and...

Wait, what?

I'm not going to the basement

of my own house.

Former house.

- Olivia.

- Gabe.

I have been patient enough.

We have the house, but we cannot

keep the orphans that came with it.

Olivia, please.

Let's discuss this in private.

I'm not going anywhere.

Why not?

I mean, who wants to be

humiliated like this?

Let's go.

But...

I mean, we...

There's so much stuff.

We're gonna need, like, a truck.

Don't bother. Everything in this house

stays. We own it.

That is correct.

And I suggest you sell it,

and see if you can buy yourself

some class.

- Mary, let's go. Right now.

- But... But...

How is everything hers?

Nora, what are we gonna do?

Move out now. Come on.

At least the bimmer's in your name.

She can't stop us

from taking that.

Okay, then after that?

I have a plan.

Bye, Carmina. I'll miss you.

- See you later.

- Take care.

This was your father's.

Thank you. Thank you.

So, where are we going?

East LA.

East LA?

I am really scared right now, Nora.

Like, we're gonna get shot.

Would you just calm down?

This place is perfectly safe.

Welcome to the barrio, mija.

- Drive. Just drive.

- Oh, my gosh.

Hey, it's fine.

Just calm down. Just drive.

Oh, my God.

Really?

What?

Nora, I can't.

Come on, look how happy she is.

She looks like the warden at a jail,

and we're the new meat.

Seriously, I will just go

and move in with Carrie, okay?

Her parents will adopt me.

You'd leave me here alone?

Well, no.

I would visit you on Sundays.

Okay, you know what? You're going

nowhere without me, all right?

I am taking the keys, all right?

Seriously, it's not funny.

- Nora!

- You need to come right now.

- Nora...

- Stop being so immature.

Nora!

- Don't leave me.

- Come on.

What do you think?

Fifteen minutes, and you are

on the other side of the border.

My God.

Hasn't changed in 10 years, no?

I can't thank you enough.

No, no, no, no, no.

Sorry, I don't...

They don't speak Spanish.

Is she planning living in there,

o que?

That's my stuff.

Yo, yo, relax.

I ain't the barrio killer.

Are you homeless?

No. Are you?

Sh*t, I need mace.

Look who's here.

There is a gang member

on your lawn.

No, mija, that's Bruno,

my neighbor.

Okay, well, he's creepy.

Not everything that stinks is caca,

mijita.

- Go home. Okay? - Hurry up,

before they charge you. Go.

- She is Nora.

- Hi.

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