Funny Face Page #7

Lousy, rotten good-for-nothing!

''Having an evening of international

philosophy, poetry,

song and meditation tonight

at my salon.''

''Would be delighted if you would

join us. Emile Flostre.''

That's where she'll be tonight.

Not showing my collection.

I'm ruined.

I'll go to Flostre's tonight

and bring her back.

And take someone who isn't

emotionally invoIved. Like me.

You'll never get in.

Empathicalists have a very firm way

with hostile vibrations.

Let's turn into

a couple of friendly vibrations.

UntiI we get in. As they say,

if you can't lick 'em, join 'em.

- Do I look grubby enough?

- Yeah. How's the beard?

- Full of pizzazz.

- Come on.

Oui? Qui est vous?

Nous sommes voyager ici

pour la meditation.

Quels noms?

La.

Ah! Monsieur et Madame Barker

de Florida.

- Florida.

- That's us. De Tallahassee.

Bon. Entrez.

- Come on, sugar.

- AIright, darlin'.

- Ou est Flostre?

- Pourquoi?

I don't know. I just asked.

On me demande

- (woman sobs)

- Pourquoi je l'ai tue

C'est triste!

- What's the matter?

- The song's a bundle of laughs.

Un moment de passion engageante

Je le detestais

She stabbed her lover

because she hated him.

Mais quand je l'ai vu

Mort, froid, et massacre

Now that the poor thing is dead...

Tout d'un coup, je savais bien

Queje l'ai aime

Now that he's dead, she loves him.

Ma tete eclate

Je suis completement derangee

This kid's a little confused.

Et maintenant

Il n'y a plus rien

Il n'y a qu'un seul remede

Now she's gonna get even.

- Je vais mejeter sur la rue

- She's gonna kill herself.

Corbillard

(man) C'est tragique!

- C'est tragique!

- You can say that again.

Hey!

Look up the airstay.

We're on the wrong floor.

Un moment, s'il vous plait.

Suivez moi.

Il me semble qu'il y a une erreur.

Il y a un autre couple

qui s'appelle Barker de Florida.

Oh-oh, the real Barkers.

Now what's this all about?

- They are not from Tallahassee!

- They ain't even from Miami.

I've never seen these people

in Tallahassee,

and I have been in every corner

of Tallahassee.

- Is this some sort of a gag?

- I know who he is!

- Il est un photographer de fashion.

- Fashion?!

She's a fashion editor.

Get 'em out!

At once,

or Mr Flostre will hear about this.

Now, wait, we're spiritual singers

on a tour and...

Now the hostile vibrations

have gone...

Attendez!

We are ready for your show.

- Command performance!

- Come on, Mama. We're on.

Let's give 'em the oId pizzazz.

Ring-a dem bells

Ring-a dem bells

We is goin'

Don't know where-a

All we know is

It's up there-a

Somehow we gotta

Climb that stair-a

Ring-a dem...

Ring-a dem...

Bells

(rings)

(music moves up tempo)

Come, all you children,

gather around

Gather around, you children!

And we will lose

that eviI spirit called voodoo

Nothing but trouble

If he's found you

If he has found you, children

But you can chase that hoodoo

With the dance that you do

Let us lead the way

Jubilee today

He'll never hound you,

step on the ground you...

Children!

Clap your hands

Slap your thighs

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Everybody come along

And join the jubilee!

Clap your hands

Slap your thighs

Don't you lose time

Come along

And shake your shoes time

Now for you and me

On the sands of time

You're only a pebble

Remember trouble must be treated

just like a rebel

Send it to the deviI

Clap your hands

Slap your thighs

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Everybody come along

and join the jubilee!

So ring-a dem bells

Ring-a dem bells out

Ring-a them, ring-a them

Ring-a them, ring-a them

Bells!

(music moves down tempo)

Well, Mr Tallahassee, how we doin'?

Why, we's the two most friendly

vibrations you ever seen.

Hey, diddle diddle,

the cat and the fiddle.

The dish ran away with the spoon.

Do you know why

a chicken crosses the road?

No, why does a chicken

cross the road?

- To get to the second floor!

- You is a genius!

Roses are red,

the violets are blue,

the dresses is gotta be showed.

Let's get this show on the road!

Clap your hands, slap your thighs,

gimme that beat, boy...

Gimme that, gimme that

crazy knocked-out beat!

You gotta...

if you wanna get to the promised land

You gotta clap your hands

Clap your hands, slap your thighs,

gimme some heat, man!

Gimme some,

gimme some Dixieland beat!

When you hear that Dixieland,

you gotta clap your hands

Clap-a your hands

Clap-a your hands

Hallelujah!

Hallelu... Hallelu...

Hallelujah

Come along and join ourjubilee!

(applause)

(Jo) Intellectual gratification

is nonexistent.

- Only you can fuIfiI that potential.

- This is it.

- Flostre, there you are.

- Professor, we need you.

What are you doing here?

You look ridiculous!

We've come to see Flostre. Professor,

Maggie and I need guidance.

We realise what futile lives we lead.

- When did you realise this?

- Today. At about two o'clock.

- Just after lunch.

- Professor, don't believe them.

We want to sit at your feet

and learn.

We sit at your feet,

ignorant, but so willing.

You leave his feet alone.

Professor, they want to make

a fooI of you.

- Are you making a fooI of him?

- Me?

You're making things difficuIt.

You don't own empathicalism.

It's in the public domain.

- Why don't you trust these people?

- Because I know them well.

I know what they're here for

and it is not guidance.

Don't listen to her. She is a child.

They came to see me, not you.

To get me over to Duval's

to model their collection.

- I should have known.

- You should've heard what he said.

If we'd come a few minutes later,

you'd have found out for yourself.

You've said enough, Mr Avery.

Not yet. I haven't toId you

what a phoney you are.

- Get out of my house.

- I'm not ready to leave.

I think I can change your mind.

- Catch!

- (Jo screams)

Oh! Oh, no!

Look what you've done!

Bursting in here like a hoodlum.

- I never touched him.

- Go away!

It's time you woke up

to your responsibilities.

Will you please leave?

Duval can't show his collection

without you.

You can't do this to him,

or to all the others.

Hundreds of people.

I'm not interested in your people.

- Your empathy is a little one-sided.

- Get out!

AIright!

I assume you mean me, too.

On you it looks cute, sugar.

Well, you fixed everything!

If you can't lick 'em, join 'em

and if you can't join 'em, lick 'em!

- Tell Duval I'm sorry.

- Where are you going?

There's a plane to New York

at 10:
30pm and I'm on it.

You can't do this to me! Come back!

How dare you leave me in the street

like this! Taxi!

- Have they gone?

- They've gone.

- And you're still here?

- I'm still here.

Are you alright?

Well.

In fact, I feel wonderfuI.

I can't tell you how sorry I am.

I had no idea they were coming,

or what got into Dick.

My dear, you mustn't assume guiIt

for something that was unavoidable.

They've gone.

You are here.

That's all that matters now.

Nice of you to say so,

but it was me...

You have the most penetrating eyes.

I can still see them

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