Gator

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1

Bull barsh! Whimpering excuses!

Incompetent crap!

Wait a minute, don't print that.

Incompetent crap!

That's all I ever get from

that one lousy county!

I've had to eat so much crow...

the conservationists are claiming

the species is practically extinct!

Governor, sir, from the

standpoint of public relations...

You'll make me look like the same jackass

I've looked like for the last three years.

Face it, gentlemen. You've been here,

watching these press conferences.

What do they ask me about?

Dunston County!

I get my picture on the cover

of Time magazine.

And what's half the damn story about?

Dunston County!

Next I'll be on national TV,

at the convention.

And the delegates and people

all over the country...

what do you think they'll be

thinking about? Nomination? No way!

They'll say, "That's that dumb

cracker who can't even clean up..."

- Sir?

- What do you want?

Governor, I...

- What do you want, Bruster?

- Bridger.

Bridger, yes.

Sir, I have a man outside who may

have the key to Dunston County.

He's on loan to us from the U.S.

Justice Department, New York.

One of the top men in their strike force.

His name is Irving Greenfield.

Wait, did you say New York?

- Yes, sir.

- Bridger, come here.

New York?

Irving Greenfield?

Jew?

Why?

He's the man who broke

the Joey Gallo case, sir.

Why didn't you say so?

Don't make him wait.

Go get him. Bring him in.

Do you believe it? Do you believe that?

Way up there in New York City,

the U.S. Justice Department...

worrying about me,

the poor little Southern governor...

who can't seem to solve his problems.

Up in New York they have

nothing to worry about...

but this Southern governor,

so what do they send from New York City?

They send me down a New York...

Come in, Mr. Greenberg.

- How are you?

- Greenfield.

- Greenfield. Fine. How are you?

- I've been waiting for weeks to see you.

- It's wonderful to have you. New York City?

- Yeah.

New York is a fine state.

The Big Apple.

Been there many times myself.

Saw Fiddler on the Roof three times.

Tell the Governor, Mr. Greenfield.

Governor, the Justice

Department has run a check...

and we found out that the whole county

of Dunston is run by one man...

Bama McCall.

We knew about that.

Then you're probably aware he grew up

with a moonshiner named Gator McKlusky?

- We weren't aware of that.

- I didn't think you were.

It seems McKlusky's just been released after

serving 26 months in the state prison.

- It was a second offense.

- Go on.

I want to bust him.

Put him in with McCall.

And if McKlusky cooperates,

we'll have enough evidence to prosecute.

Why would this Gator

McKlusky want to do this?

We have reason to believe

he's still making illegal whiskey.

And a three-time loser has a way

of cooperating, if you know what I mean.

One question. When?

When?

Just in time for the

national convention...

and your TV report on the squeaky-clean

government of Dunston County.

Sold. What do you need?

Since that boy got back

from that place...

he ain't been worth a tinker's damn.

He wants to be like an old tomcat.

He wants to prowl all

night and sleep all day.

Ain't got a lick of work out of him

ever since he got back down here.

Since when you ain't using beet

sugar instead of cane sugar...

like we're supposed to?

- Gator said.

- I've made quality whiskey all my life...

and no place in the book does it

says sugar beet's as good as cane.

Is that what they taught

you up in that place, boy?

What else did they teach you up there?

I think that's what I missed

the most in the morning.

Your bitching and moaning.

You want some breakfast, girl?

I done ate before you got up.

What time did they wake

you up in that place?

You hang around with murderers, thieves,

crooks and Lord knows what else.

Them ain't nice people for

you to hang around with.

I'll try to remember that, Pop.

That's a good idea.

You done lost all your

respect for quality.

Now you name me one thing of

quality that you can do today.

- License plates.

- License plates?

I can make quality license plates.

I was gonna make one of them

personalized ones for you.

- But I didn't know how to spell "senile."

- Senile, am I?

I'm gonna have to take

you down a notch or two.

How'd you like I put a Dutch

rub on you, right now?

Do it, Grandpa!

And you, young lady, mind your manners.

Gator, this child's been

out of school too long.

Two years.

She's beginning to revert to the wilds.

Is that right, girl?

You reverting back to the wilds?

- I ain't.

- I'll tell you what else she needs.

She needs to hang around young'uns

her age, instead of an old codger like me.

And I ain't going to

school this year, either.

You ain't? You is going back to school.

Come September,

you're gonna be in school, girl.

Can I play football?

Yeah.

- And wear pretty little dresses, too.

- Don't like no dresses.

Your momma sure did.

Hello there, puppy.

Hello, chopper.

This is Greenfield.

We're lost.

Down there! I think we got something.

What's that?

- What is that, Pop?

- It's a darned helicopter.

I know that, but who's in it?

Looks like Fish and Game.

Not in a helicopter.

Them's whiskey agents. Come on.

Mr. Greenfield, we got him. That's him.

When you see him,

drop a smoke bomb, and circle!

Do you read me?

Drop a smoke bomb, and circle!

Head the boat towards the marker.

I can't.

- What?

- I said, I can't, sir!

- Sheriff, head the boat towards the marker.

- Can't do that, Mr. Greenfield.

We'll have to go around.

I said turn the boat towards

the gosh damn marker!

Right.

- Hate to lose a load to those bloodsuckers.

- We won't.

Looks like they're serious this time.

- I'll give 'em a run for their money.

- Do that.

Don't you worry, Suzie.

They ain't gonna catch your pappy.

I ain't worried, Grandpa.

If they get too close,

Gator'll hit that jet in his boat...

make 'em think they've

been hit by a tidal wave.

- So don't worry.

- I ain't worried, Grandpa.

If they get too close, I'll shoot

'em in the butt with a full load...

if they mess with us. So don't worry.

- I ain't worried, Grandpa.

- I am!

They're bombing us now.

It's the first time they've done that.

You did it.

You can't get it off.

What does it mean, you can't get it off?

It means we're gonna be here for a while.

Maybe you'd like to call a cab.

A cab.

Cute.

Sir, did you fire that shotgun?

It went off accidental while I was

cleaning it. While I was fishing.

You're a liar, Pop.

- Now take it easy, Tom.

- Don't you call me no liar.

I'll shove this shotgun up your butt!

Get over there!

Don't let him talk like that

in front of my granddaughter.

You rat-faced bastard!

- Take it easy, Bob.

- Don't you hit that child!

I'm not gonna hit her.

I just don't want to feed her.

We got the old man and the

girl over here. This is Cobia 2.

Ned McKlusky, you're under arrest.

You have the right to remain silent...

Stop that!

Boat 4 and 5, come in.

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